DaoistFreddieG
I’ve read a lot so if I critique your book, just know it’s just tough love and I’m most likely gonna keep on reading... unless your novel is trash and the grammar sucks
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DaoistFreddieG1hComentado porMight as well, just give him the full-blown speed force
First: for when they go to the fantastic 4 and get hit with the blast of cosmic energy, Peter would develop the powers to change the properties of his lighting while having a broader range and flexibility. While Gwen's ice would be upgraded the same type of way.- DaoistFreddieG2dComentado por
It’s never too late to change
(A/N: First the Widows joined and now the Valkyrie might come to earth… If this was a harem story, Peter would be drowning in warrior women by now.) - DaoistFreddieG4dComentado por
Invest it and live off of the dividends
"Were you even listening to what I said previously, I'm going to get that amount of money annually. Which means even if you save the necessary funds, I'm still going to have alot left over, so instead of it just collecting dust in the bank, it's better you use it and make all of our lifes easier" - DaoistFreddieG6dComentado porCh 68 C68 Ruthless Castration
- DaoistFreddieG10dComentado por
Annnnnnd you turned him into Spider-Man for no reason. Quips and all.
"Wow, that went boom quickly, hey, yo, hello, blue boys, up here, I know you are all trying to be all heroic and all, but this is the part where you run away, like as fast as you fucking can, like right now, before the big guy wakes up!" Peter said in a relaxed nonchalant tone, totally out of place in their current situation. - DaoistFreddieG11drespondió a Gman1
lol rip
Expect the next chapter at the end of next month. - DaoistFreddieG13dComentado porCh 4 Powers Chp 4
- DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
Should’ve called it the crush crush fruit
[Pulverize-Pulverize Fruit - Gives the user the ability to crush anything into pieces, making them a Pulverizing Human.] - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
Cyclops has no physical enhancements. He’s basically a normal human who trained really hard, but still has squishy flesh and normal bones. he would’ve died getting punched at that speed and power. Moving that fast and punching that hard enhances the final force of the blow to the point where he should’ve had a hole blown through his chest
Scott coughed twice from where he stood, rising from the ground and dusting off his uniform. With a composed demeanor, he assured, "I'm alright." - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
I don’t think the author understands that grip strength and punching force are two entirely different things. Grip strength has to do with your forearms and finger strength. Punching force has to do with full body muscle movement to drive your fist into some thing. Punching force would be much higher than grip strength; much higher than only two times stronger than grip strength.
With a grip strength of six tons, each punch packed a force of at least twelve tons. Adding a charge would further enhance the explosive power with additional kinetic energy. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
Just say he reverse engineered it
On top of that if he were to reveal Fuinjutsu, Spirit Transformation Technique and a bunch of jutsu only once used by Tobirama, anyone would be able to see that he has a problem. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
Why is it that every author that writes a Naruto fanfiction has to come up with an epithet for the main character? It’s one of the most overdone clichés in this fandom. Just have his name be well-known, not some over achieving, chunni epithet.
"Yeah, The Blue Storm of Leaf! Truly turning out to be the difference maker." - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
What type of idiot passes up the ability to become one of the strongest people in the universe? Especially when he knows the plot and how to control said power. It sounds so dumb to pass that up.
Closing his eyes, Izuku both surprised and impressed All Might by saying, "As I am, I'm unworthy of such power. After all, while it's true that I want to help people, my reasons for becoming a Hero are fairly selfish. Leading the next generation and becoming the Symbol of Peace...I'm not sure I'm capable of such selflessness..." - DaoistFreddieG1mthrespondió a DaoistFreddieG
I stand corrected lol
With his current physical attributes, Izuku doubted he could defeat even the weakest Villain bot. If he focused on helping people, however, there was a good chance he could pass without needing to. The only problem was that the UA Entrance Exam was just the beginning. Once he became a student, Izuku would be expected to participate in combat and rescue training, exercises that would require skillful use of one's Quirk or a strong physique. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
So just put 50 in each category. Bakugo had like 25-30 points for each category, roughly. I’m pretty sure that him putting 50 in each would make him stand out and he get the traits. You’re just nerfing him for the exam for no reason.
With his current physical attributes, Izuku doubted he could defeat even the weakest Villain bot. If he focused on helping people, however, there was a good chance he could pass without needing to. The only problem was that the UA Entrance Exam was just the beginning. Once he became a student, Izuku would be expected to participate in combat and rescue training, exercises that would require skillful use of one's Quirk or a strong physique. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
So he decides not to read her mind? Learn a whole bunch of secrets? Lack of impulse control
That night, that particular basement was filled with screams of utter despair of a woman that shall haunt the building for the years to come.. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
I see you like the dumb and dense protagonist troupe. Honestly disgusting.
Ignoring the intense gaze of Illyana and whatever i sensed from her using my [Empathy], I extended my [TK Domain] and observed the houses near us and the residents within them. Seeing all of them acting normal was enough as it seems they didn't really heard the pained howls of father just now. Not bad, seems like the soundproof force-field i placed around the house was effective. - DaoistFreddieG1mthComentado por
He barely fought it for less than a minute
Minutes turned to hours as they converse and laughed along the tour trying to know more about each other. Andrew was already getting bored with the constant talk and touring as he already explored most of the big mansion's corners using his TK Domain and was already getting sleepy–fighting a gigantic nigh immortal bear is taxing if you don't know.