Alex grabbed his hand, he could see worry fill her eyes.
"No, it's not your fault but mine," she said. His hand gently touched her face and she leaned in letting him caress her.
"What's wrong, Alex, is there something bothering you," he asked.
She opened her eyes and sighed, "I know you said to tell you everything & I tried, but this is still new to me. I haven't learnt yet how to share my inner feelings with anyone, not even mother" she said.
Nathan pulled her close, "Alex I don't want you to force yourself if you don't feel anything. I don't want my feelings for you to scare you away from me"
She smiled, "So far this is the only best thing that has happened to me this year. And I don't know if what am feeling towards you is genuine to how you feel but I know I don't hate your touch".
He breathed holding her tightly, a little kiss on her forehead made her smile even more.
"Then what is it that's making you scared, love? I want to know so I can know where to help you" he said.
She looked up at him and Nathan gazed back.
"It's....." she stopped.
His light smile with his calm patient eyes down on her made her tear up.
"It's alright, Alex. You don't have to say it right now, am here and can wait until you are fully ready to tell me" he said.
"I want to tell you right now" she muttered.
"Okay, then go ahead," he said.
Alex sat up facing him, Nathan let her take her time to speak.
"This happened a long time ago, mom, Dad or Cynthia know nothing about it.....during my last year in college something happened," she said biting her lip.
He held her hands, encouraging her to go on.
"It was on the night of our graduation, Cynthia forced me to go to her graduation party. I didn't want to go but she claimed I needed to do this since I had been so anti-social through college".
He felt her hand start to tremble, "If it's hard... don't push yourself" he murmured.
"Am okay?" she said. "There was this one boy who had been pestering me since my first year & Cynthia had invited him cause he claimed to have a crush on me. He asked me to dance and after a lot of pushing from my sister I accepted".
"During the dance, his hands kept moving all over me and I found it uncomfortable, so I asked him to stop, but instead he aggressively pulled me closer... I slapped him hard across the face and ran out" she let out.
He could see tears form in her eyes, "I thought he would not approach me again and maybe I was rude, after all, it was my first time being that close to any man and I wanted to apologize. But I was wrong....."