Chapter 1

“I amnot getting on that thing.”

Steven smiled.“Come on,try new things in your life.I did and look where it got me.From cop to civilian in sixty days.”He turned the horse in a circle,his long legs snug around her.Overhead,gulls cawed and laughed.The horse’s hooves kicked some sand and she tossed her head,nostrils flaring.She snorted.“Conrad,meet Lady.”

“Is this the big surprise?”

“Well,she’s big isn’t she?”

“And this is not gonna work.”I took a half-step backwards towards the safety of the motel room.

I smelled her,the rich horse-y scent wafted over with the sea breeze.Her coat was a burnished gold,almost the same color as Steven’s hair.His sunscreen had a touch ofcoconut in it and that made my stomach rumble from hunger.“I’m not sure about this.She’s…she’s huge.”

“Yeah,she is.She’s Belgian and they’re normally cart horses but I needed a horsewho could handle four hundred pounds.Her trot is kinda clunky but her other gaits are perfect.”

I just shook my head.

“Look,she’s really cool.Watch this.”Steven dropped the reins and lay back on the horse’s broad butt.He put his arms out,and Lady stood still,calm.Steven’s chest gleamed in the morning light,belly taut.He had a few freckles on his neck and shoulders.I wanted to lick down his torso.

Eight months together and he still does it to me.Every time.

About the horse though,I wasn’t convinced.“I dunno.”

I’d grown up in the city,running the streets of Jacksonville,playing the urban thug-lite card as a teen.I ran street raves once I got out of high school,putting together killer music for people who wanted to X their way through the night,DJing real parties and weddings for cash,upgrading my sound system every other week.Without realizing,I hung out with the wrong crowd,and it was Steven who had worked undercover to bust my friend,Marco,who was dealing.

But now,Steven wasn’t a cop anymore.Because of me.Part of me felt guilty that Steven had taken the heat for letting me run the night of the bust;part of me was grateful that I hadn’t gotten hauled in with the rest of the ravers.

And part of me was falling in love.

“Tell you what.Let’s eat breakfast here and you can get to know her.Then decide.”Steven slipped off Lady’s back and looped her reins over the brown railing.

She looked weird among the gleaming cars in the parking lot,two steps from our room.

Lady promptly put her nose down and began snuffling at the sparse grass in the sandy coating over the asphalt.

Steven had picked an inexpensive motel for our little vacation and it had a rustic look—brown timber frames around a brick walkway,cedar shakes for siding.We left our room’s door open,moved the table and chairs outside,and ate breakfast four feet from Lady.Peaches over Cheerios,a favorite since childhood.I’d mentioned itone night in bed,just talking,and Steven came back from the grocery store the next day with both.

After breakfast,he nudged me.“Come on,give her a treat and say hello.”Steven gave me a handful of Cheerios.

I stood an arm’s length away from the horse.She was enormous:her back as high as mychest,her head looked to be three feet long,and full of teeth.Lady’s wide nostrils quivered as we stepped closer.Her feet—hooves—were as big as dinner plates.She stomped one on the sand and I jerked back.

“Here’s how to say hello to a horse.”Steven leaned down and breathed into Lady’snose.She huffed back,her muzzle moving.“Come on,a little closer.”

I stepped a little forward,fingers clenched on the dry cereal.

“Open your hand,have your palm flat when you feed her.That way she won’t get a finger by accident,”Steven said.His blue eyes were soft and understanding.

I put out my hand and felt Lady’s quivering whiskers first,stiff as a broom,then her soft muzzle.It tickled as her delicate lips gathered in the cereal.I let my palmrest under her chin and stroked her.So soft,living velvet.She nuzzled my arm and her wet lips brushed my belly.“Wow.”

“Yeah,she’s wow.Let’s go for a ride.”

“I’m not sure…”

“Okay,then,I’ll just head down the beach,and find some other hunky guy to wrap his arms around me,and nibble on my neck all morning.How’s that sound?”But Steven’s voice was tender and joking.

“You’ll go slow?”My belly quivered.Keeping five hundred people dancing,drinking,high,and happy was a breeze.Getting on this animal’s back and trusting her not to throw me off and then stomp on me?An entirely different proposition.

Control.I always wanted to be in control.

Steven leaned over and planted a soft kiss on my neck.“I promise,we’ll go as slow as you want.”

“Okay,then.Let’s go.”

“You gotta change,you can’t wear those jeans.”

Steven was in swim trunks,neon orange today.We’d both gotten some sun since arriving on Sunday and Steven’s skin was a warm,golden tan;mine was now a deeper olive-y brown.“Put on some trunks,you’ll be more comfortable.Trust me—chafage,dude.”

A minute later,I stepped back outside,shirt and jeans off,trunks on.I handed Steven the sunscreen.I’d long since given up arguing that I didn’t need it with my Hispanic heritage and dark skin.It felt free and easy to be so open with Steven in this strange town.If people stared at us for sitting side by side in a restaurant booth,or for sharing a quick kiss in public,I didn’t really care.I was vaguely aware that another room’s door opened and closed as we stood there,but didn’t mind.Steven’s hands slippery with the lotion on my back,affection in every stroke of his hands.

God,I love this.He spoils me like Donalita never did.

“All right,pardner,let’s git you up here.”A twang in Steven’s voice.He swung up on the horse;at six-foot-two,his move was fluid and easy.Lady wore some kind of pad,a thick cushion of cream fleece with a bright pink girth.“Here,let’s go over to the flowerbed.Stand on it.”

I wavered on the brick of the flowerbed,a foot off the ground and I’d still have to stretch up and over to get on Lady.I pressed my lips together,concentrating on not falling.

“You’re doing fine.Ease over with your right leg and grab onto me.Come on.”Steven’s blue eyes held me,something beyond warmth in them.Love?

I stretched over,legs spread,felt the soft fleece along my thighs,and grabbed Steven’s waist.Lady shifted once,I gripped tighter.

“You’re fine.Just sit there for a minute and get a feel for her.”

I felt stretched.Lady was wide,wider than a normal-sized horse,not that I would know.It was like straddling a barrel.I nestled my legs against Steven’s long limbsand our feet touched.I leaned closer and pressed against Steven’s back,breathing on the bruises I’d left on his neck over the past four nights.“Okay,cowboy,let’s go for a ride,”I said.

Steven clucked with his tongue and Lady walked calmly out of the parking lot and onto the beach.