To Grow Wings And Fly

Slamming the door behind her, Carol leaned her back against it and closed her eyes.

Why did she do such a stupid thing?

She lost her composure due to such an insignificant thing.

"Haahh…" As she sighed, the girl slowly slid onto the floor.

She's the daughter of the great General Rochester.

She's the sister of a prodigy.

There's a pride she needed to uphold.

She can't afford to make a mistake.

She needs to be worthy of standing beside the people that surround her.

She needs to be the best, so that people would recognize her as a Rochester and look up to her.

She can't show emotion so easily.

She has to judge who to be her friend with great caution, so that she wouldn't tarnish her family's reputation.

But she went against those rules.

She exposed her true thoughts in front of a servant; she wasn't the best; she made the wrong group of friends; she…

She was unfit to be a Rochester.

How will Father look at this incident? He's bound to be disappointed. Angry perhaps?

Will he punish her?

Imagining his icy stare full of disapproval, Carol trembled.

"I'm sorry… I'm sorry…" As she mumbled, tears silently rolled down her face.

Ah… Why am I crying?

As she was hit by this thought, it was a like a dam had burst inside of her; and the tears came down like a waterfall.

N-No. Don't cry. Don't cry…

You can't cry.

The girl rubbed her eyes with her sleeve, trying to rub away the tears in vain.

She cried even harder, sobbing into her hands.

You are unable to defend against the slightest provocation. What if Father abandons you because you are so weak? What can you do then? Huh? She scolded herself.

Even worse, what if Carlos abandons you?

Struck by this horrifying thought, Carol was so frightened that she stopped crying.

N-No. That can't happen, she frantically denied. I'm always so good to him, so he would never…

But what if?

Even though that mutant isn't suitable to be his friend, at the end of the day, you still yelled at HIS belonging, HIS servant, HIS bodyguard, HIS friend. In addition, you have never directly told him about your affection for him; with that dense personality of his, he probably doesn't even realize your love.

Carol shuddered.

The second miss of the Rochester household hadn't always been so doting on her younger brother as she is now.

When they were young, she had been left with him and the nanny. When Carlos had been a few months old, Mrs. Kleinen wanted to develop Carol's caring side by teaching her how to take care of her younger brother.

At this point, the young girl was eight years old. She had already developed her own personality, which to the nanny's dismay, was snobby and cold.

As such, it wasn't a surprise that Carol refused her offer. She preferred to play by herself and disliked having anything by her side that would drag her down.

But one day, she passed by the crib where the infant was in, and with time on her hands, she decided to take a look.

Looking at the sleeping infant's long delicate eyelashes and his little hands furled into tiny fists, the young girl was mesmerized.

Then, when the baby opened his eyes that were so much like her own yet a little different, sparkling emerald, Carol was completely swept away.

Her little brother had reached out his stubby little arms in an attempt that seemed like he wanted a hug!

But Carol, who had never learned how to properly hold a baby, was reluctant to do it. She was afraid that she would accidentally hurt him.

It was… the first time she felt this way!

Just then, the nanny had entered the room. Seeing how for the first time, the young girl showed interest in her brother, Mrs. Kleinen had immediately taught her the basics of taking care of babies.

When Carol gently swayed the laughing Carlos in her arms, she felt an inexplicable sense of joy.

As she felt the infant's fragile body against her hands and his levelled breathing against the rhythm of her heartbeat, it was the first time the young girl acknowledged that something was precious. But it was only the start.

Ever since that day, Carol would frequently visit and play with her younger brother. Although she still acted very condescendingly cold to everyone else and acted very 'normal', her world view had drastically changed.

Her world had grown more colorful.

She had someone to care for, to protect. She had someone she loved with all of her heart.

So she couldn't lose him. She couldn't afford to. She relied on him to an extent so large that it was amazing to think of.

Suddenly, Carol heard a knock behind her and flinched, waking her up from her thoughts.

"Carol?" It was a familiar yet unfamiliar female voice. "Are you in there?"

It was Eyrie, her older sister. Carol's eyes dimmed as she slowly backed away from the door without making a sound.

"Carol, are you in there?" Eyrie repeated, a slight panic in her voice. "I'm going to open the door, okay?"

After saying so, the door opened a crack. But before it could open further, the girl in the room immediately pushed it closed.

Carol silently cursed at herself. Damn it! Why didn't I lock the door?!

She heard her sister let out a breath of relief. "So you are in there. I came to ask if you wanted to go to The Saint Rita's Cathedral with the rest of us. They have some sort of event going on."

"… No, I'm fine." She gritted her teeth.

"Carol, are you okay? You don't sound too well."

"I'm fine." Ah. That came out really cold didn't it? The younger girl looked at the door in nervousness.

There was a brief silence. Finally, Eyrie spoke quietly, "Ok. But you know? You can always talk to me if something's bothering you."

"…" You are closer to servants than to your own sister. Until recently, you always stayed away from everyone in the family. How do you expect me to believe you? Carol silently rebuked her sister in her head.

Listening to the sound of fading footsteps, she carefully slid towards the door once again. Leaning her back against it, she absentmindedly stared at the drawn curtains that covered the clear French windows.

After an unknown period of time, the teenaged girl finally withdrew her gaze. She stood up and wobbled her way towards them. With a wave of her hand, she pushed the curtains aside and looked at the setting sun on the horizon.

It was beautiful, like a scene from another world. The glowing sun melted away the fleeting cotton clouds and tinted the gleaming skyscrapers with the color of fire. Everything that the eye could see was bathed in red and orange.

Carol reached out her hand in an attempt to reach into the sky, hoping that somehow, she could grow wings and fly off, never having to care about secular matters again.

But a pity.

Even as the sun disappeared from view and darkness fell upon the sky, she didn't grow any wings.

But even as Carol was disappointed, part of her felt relieved too. After all, her little brother wasn't here.

If she ever had the ability to fly away, she decided that would selfishly bring Carlos along too.