Desperatio, Zelotypia, Expone [5]

"I-I—" Evelyn stuttered, and then immediately punched the Theodore on the right hard on the face.

As that Theodore fell down to the ground, shocked, the other Theodore heaved a sigh of relief.

"Thank yo—"

But before he could finish his sentence, Evelyn suddenly snapped her body toward him and similarly punched him, sending him to the ground. She stared at both Theodores squirming on the ground in absolute confusion. "Huh? Why isn't it..."

A Theodore recovered from the punch and shouted with a frown. "What did you fucking expect? The doppelganger wouldn't turn back after one mere punch! Did you not fucking see us pummeling the shit out of each other earlier?!"

"W-well..." Evelyn stammered, realizing the stupidity of her action.

"Not the brightest of people out there, aren't you, cat?" The other Theodore said as he stood up again and got into a fighting stance.

Seeing this, Theodore pounced on Theodore, who countered with a punch. Theodore staggered for a bit, but recovered quick enough to return a low jab. Theodore dashed in for a headlock, choking Theodore out. Theodore thrashed around to get Theodore off him, eventually sending both of them to the ground. They tangled with each other, both of them scratched, bit, and cursed at each other to get the slightest of advantages.

Seeing the confusion mess of Theodore fighting, Evelyn shouted, "how am I supposed to know who's real?"

"I don't know, maybe both of us are real."

"Shithead, you're confusing her even further!"

"Fuck you!"

"Fuck you too!"

They continued to fight each other, until a Theodore wiped the blood on his lips with his eyes lit up, as if he had just thought of something.

"Cat, I saw you decapitate a merchant."

Though weirded out by the sudden statement, Evelyn realized that this was Theodore's way of proving to her that he was real! But just as she was about to fight the other Theodore...

"You tried to kill me in the dark wagon, cat," said the other Theodore with haste.

"What the fuck? How did you know that?" A Theodore shouted as he cladded his hands in lightning and delivered a hefty left hook.

"I'm supposed to ask that! How the fuck did you know that?" Theodore said as he ducked the attack and tried to sweep Theodore's legs, which failed since Theodore managed to jump in the nick of time.

Confused, Evelyn quickly shouted, "try to remember something more intricate and detailed! Something that the fake wouldn't know!"

Hearing this, a Theodore shouted, "I'm the one with grayer eyes."

"The fuck are you on?" The other Theodore quickly said in a loud voice, "don't listen to this fake! Cat, listen to me, I'm the one who revealed your own hypocrisy to you. Humans aren't all bad."

"What the fuck? You were there too?" A Theodore said with a frown.

"I'm supposed to be the one asking that!"

Evelyn ignored their almost childish argument and mused over their words. On one hand, one of them told her the very true and significant fact that he had made her see the truth about her hypocrisy, however forceful and painful that may have been. On the other hand...

"Aha! So you're the fake!"

Hearing this, both Theodore temporarily halted their fight and looked at Evelyn with a mixture of hope and nervousness.

Evelyn alternated her gaze between the two of them. The one on the right was the one that told her about his role in making her not hate humans; and the one of the left told her something really nonsensical.

'I can't believe I didn't realize this sooner,' Evelyn thought with a snicker.

Tensing her legs, Evelyn hurled a heavy punch toward the Theodore on the left. But just as the Theodore on the right was cheering, she stopped her fist just inches away from her original target, and kicked the Theodore on the right in his crotch.

"Ooooh, that's going to hurt," the Theodore on the left winced, though he was pitying the other Theodore more than making fun of him.

As soon as the Theodore on the right fell to the ground, Theodore dashed in and stabbed his lightning-clad hand into his chest, ripping his heart out with ease. Soon, the literally heartless Theodore convulsed, before his form slowly shrunk into that of a squirrel.

Space around Theodore's hand distorted, before the heart, which was now pitch-black, was transported into his storage. Easily, kicking the small corpse of the squirrel out a nearby window, Theodore whistled, "glad you're not completely stupid like Ria."

Evelyn nodded absentmindedly and looked out the window. Although the Void lord that tried to kill Theodore, and maybe even Evelyn herself, died, she couldn't help but to feel a bit sorry for it.

As if knowing what Evelyn was thinking, Theodore tapped on her shoulder and attempted a joke to brighten her mood.

"Now you understand what I felt like when you fought Primel."

Hearing this, Evelyn chuckled. That was exactly how she knew which Theodore was real. During the days when they were in the city, looking for Primel, Theodore had made it some kind of inside joke that he often used to make fun of her.

Then, Theodore fell to the ground with a pained groan. He massaged his cheeks, which were swollen, and his body, which was brutally bruised.

"Can you give me some Recovery potions?" He said after his hand disappeared into empty space and reappeared again. "I'm out of them."

Evelyn nodded and threw him a medium-grade Recovery potion, which she took out from her Space pouch. Watching Theodore dumping all of its content onto his body instead of drinking it, she asked, "anything else you need?"

"Mmmm... Mana potions."

"Don't have any," Evelyn replied after briefly checking her pouch.

"Figured," Theodore shrugged. "Looks like I'll have to make do with purely my physical strength."

As Theodore was about to stand up, Evelyn quick said, "you're injured!"

"So?" Theodore ignored her and stood up anyway. "The other Void lord could escape at any moment. I don't want everything I did to come to naught. Besides, it's not like I'm going to recover my Mana quick enough."

Evelyn wanted to retort, but she couldn't. Everything Theodore said made sense. Thus, she could only follow him silently as he made his way deeper into her old home.

With every twist and turn, Theodore travelled with confidence, as if he had been the one who spent his entire childhood living here, not her. Evelyn swallowed the urge to ask the obvious question and decided to silently follow Theodore, for now.

***

'Damn... I'm glad the novel focused on fucking useless details.'

I had, in fact, never been here before. However, the novel went into excruciating and painful detail of every corner of this mansion when Arthur visited it, and Marcos, with his photographic memory, had no choice but to remember the entire layout of this place.

There was another reason why I could move with such confidence, that was, my Saintly senses. Since [Despair] wasn't even trying to hide his foul-feeling aura, I could feel where he was rather easily. And, of course, he was in the basement of the mansion.

'I wish every Void lords were like this idiot.'

After all, if every Void lords were to not even make an effort to conceal their aura like this, then Arthur would've been able to sense them without the need of direct physical contact.

Pausing my thoughts there, I focused on getting to the Void lord as soon as possible without wasting much of my strength, and eventually, I arrived at the basement's door.

As I was about to turn the door knob to get in, I froze.

'Hey, the cat's here anyways.'

I stepped to the side and gestured toward the door with a polite smile. "Ladies first."

Evelyn scowled but eventually relented and moved toward the door. She conjured up layers upon layers of plate armor made of rocks, preparing for whatever that was behind the door.

However, I knew that if the Void lord had set up a trap, no amount of rocks that she could currently conjure up could protect her fully.

'Well, if she dies, she dies.'

The plot would definitely be fucked beyond repair, but at least I could still keep my life. The only reason why I ordered her out of the city earlier was because I was confident that I could take on the 2 Void lord alone(ish) anyway. But now that Weizer decided to be a dick and used his Skill right when he was going to me summoned, I needed every help I could get.

Oh, and Adel would definitely blame me for the plot going awry and hunt me down if Evelyn died, but at least I could have a chance of surviving.

Leaving whatever consequences to my future self, I held my breath as I watched Evelyn open the door. Surprisingly, it didn't blow up in her face. Even more surprisingly, she was able to enter the basement just fine. I followed her suit, and, after a minute of walking through the dark stairways, I could finally see [Despair].

There he was, standing in a middle of a ritual circle, reciting ominous chants, candles surrounding him. He noticed our presence, because of course he did, and look up at us in surprise.

"W-Where's m—"

"Dead." I interrupted him, knowing what he was going to ask. "Heart's ripped out. Don't even think about reviving it.

As soon as he heard me, the Void lord's face darkened as his entire body trembled with rage. Rage that wasn't directed at us, nor at himself. Instead, it was at...

"USELESS!" He screamed; his scream so loud that several candles were put out... somehow. "ALL THE RESOURCES I POURED INTO YOU, AND YET YOU...YOU...YOU—" He crushed the candles nearest to him under his feet, though that did little to alleviate his anger. "—FAILED TO STOP TWO KIDS!"

Realizing that this was the perfect chance, I jumped over the stair railings and dashed toward the Void lord, a sword made of Evelyn's Earth magic in hand, aiming to pierce his heart cleanly.

However, as if anticipating everything, he rubbed his foot on a certain part of the circle he was standing on, turning the ritual circle into something else. Before I could even process what he had just done, darkness enveloped me, and I was met with a familiar murky feeling of all my senses being disabled.

|Again? Seriously?|

Of course, it was Prostor.

It is I. Now, are you going to rescue me, or are you going to whine about not having enough divinity?

|I have more than enough to spare to save your pitifully fragile mind,| Prostor said as a matter of fact, |but this time, I don't even need to intervene. You'll be saved either way, so I'm just here to watch the show unfold.|

What do you mean?

|You'll see soon enough,| I could hear Prostor's tone getting a bit nostalgic, |send him my regards.|

Who's "him"?

|An old friend. You'll know when you see him.|

And with that, I left Prostor's domain. However, what greeted my wasn't the creepy basement I was in just seconds ago, but instead the raised wooden platform that I saw when I utilized the other me's memory to destroy the governor's mansion.

However, something was different. Everything felt more...vivid somehow. Oh, and [Despair] himself was standing right in front of me, his back against the thousands of soldiers and priests who were marching toward the platform.

Before I could say anything, the Void lord looked over my shoulder and sneered, "this is your biggest despair?"

"What?"

"Don't lie to me. That circle, it allows me to access your deepest pain and despair. You've already lost as soon as you were pulled in here, so humor me, what's the narrative here?"

"...?"

Seeing my confused look, the Void lord sighed, "I mean the story behind this scene. What is it that made this the lowest moment in your life?"

As he said that, a brief look of surprise flashed through his eyes. "Oh, how interesting! You had another moment like this, and it's just as painful as this one! We'll definitely be seeing that after this! Now tell me, what's the story?"

I looked at the Void lord, who were jumping up and down with his eyes shinning with excitement like a child, with bafflement. I knew that Void lords were mentally deranged, but to make shit up that didn't even make sense?

However, I soon recalled how absurd this world was and thus, decided to listen to his words, for now. Maybe I could find a way to escape if I played along with his games for a bit. As I was about to answer his question, however, I suddenly realized something. Whatever this scene was, I hadn't experienced it before, at least not personally.

'It seems to be the other me's memory.'

But why did the circle pull me into this? If its goal was to show me my worst despair, it could've used the time when I was captured by goblins, or the time when I first found the letter mom left me.

"Too shocked, huh?" [Despair] said with a sneer. Then, he walked past me with a confident gait. "Then I suppose I'll have to torture you mentally until you decide to open your mouth. Starting with...whoever this is."

I turned around to see who the Void lord was walking toward, and of course, it was the blurry woman I saw before. However, as he got closer to the hanging body, everything also slowly became clearer.

Eventually, the body became near enough that I had a hunch who that was, but I simply refused to accept it. But as everything became clearer, I had to acccept the absurd truth.

Half-closed ruby-red eyes, waist-long silver hair, white feathery wings dyed red with blood, and a face that screamed "ruthlessness" but also "innocence" at the same time, she was... Eleanor Salvant.

But to me, I could only see her as Adeliast Salvant, and—

"—my beloved," I inadvertently muttered those words out loud, though I wasn't exactly sure if "I" was the one who said that.

It seemed that the Void lord recognized who it was too, as he soon took a step back in shock. "W-what? The princess? But she's still alive!"

He then snapped his head toward me to look for an explanation. However, I merely responded by shrugging. I was as confused as he was, if not more. The only one who could explain this was the other me, but he wasn't alive anymor—

But suddenly, I felt immense discomfort inside my body, as if something was tugging against my soul. That discomfort soon turned into excruciating pain as I let out a silent scream; the gentle yet annoying tug now felt like a violent rip. Eventually, the pain disappeared completely, and I felt a suddenly presence right beside me.

As I looked to my side, I saw...me—only, a bit rougher, and had a lot more scars.

His sudden appearance, coupled with the literally soul-ripping pain I felt earlier, could only mean one thing.

"Did you just fucking come out of me?"

But he ignored my remark and steadily made his way toward Adel's body, ignoring the still-very-much-confused Void lord. As he reached her, he cupped her cheek with one of his hands and caressed it, tracing his fingers on her bloodied wings with the other.

"You want the narrative?" He said without breaking contact or looking away from Adel. "I'll give you one."

Then, the rope snapped, and the other me placed Adel's corpse on his laps, basically giving her a lap pillow. Patting Adel on her head, he said, "we met right in Kerudark, when she followed Arthur on his business."

Saying that, he looked straight at me. Immediately, I understood what he was talking about. It seemed that he and Adel supposedly met in Evelyn's character arc.

"Although I was working to keep the timel— well, I guess it'll be easier for you to call it as "plotline," in check at the time, I didn't want to interact with the main cast." The other me said as he looked at me straight in the eyes.

I nodded, knowing full well what he meant. Though, the Void lord didn't understand, and fortunately so.

"I'm pretty sure that she didn't think but of our meeting at first, and it would've been that way—her and I parting ways and never meeting each other again—if it wasn't for the fact that Arthur was worried about her safety due to the recent poisonings in the Imperial palace and hired me as her personal guard."

"..."

"Of course, I refused him on the spot," he chuckled, "but that damn tree hugger kept threatening me to take the offer. Not just that, basically everyone in his party was pressuring me. So, I reluctantly accepted; the tree hugger even whispered to me that it was okay to seduce Adel."

"..."

"I-I..." The other me stammered, closing his eyes to recall a distant memory. "...I fucked up. I walked on her muttering her plans to keep the plotline in check out loud, and she of course tried to kill me. However, I subdued her and... I didn't know what came over me at that time but, I'm glad that it did. I revealed to her my knowledge of the novel."

"Novel?" The Void lord suddenly interjected. However, he was shut up by both my and the other me's glares.

"Well, things got complicated after that. We often met each other secretly, discussing plans for the plot, but eventually, the meetings turned into dates. And, before we knew it, we were lovers."

"..."

"Things got even more complicated when Syl also fell for me," he grinned at me with a soft voice, "but that's a story for another time."

Clearing his throat, he continued caressing Adel's head before continuing, "of course, a princess and her guard being lover is unacceptable, however much the Emperor and Empress approved of it. So, Adel decided to renounce her position as the Imperial princess, and fled with me faraway, where we continued to work in the shadow to ensure that the world doesn't go to shit."

"..."

The other me then gnashed his teeth in anger. His glare rested far behind me, on the Imperial prince Gabriel, who was frozen in time, just like the thousands of people around him. "That bastard, he's a deranged paranoid. He was so convinced that Adel and I was plotting against him that he made a degree as soon as he became Emperor, stating that Adel and I were heretics, corrupted, blaming us for every little misfortune that befell the Empire."

"..."

"Eventually, Adel was caught. Do you know who caught her?" He looked straight into my eyes. "Do you fucking know who?"

"No...?"

"Of course you fucking don't. Just take a guess!"

"Umm... uhhh..." Knowing my luck, I was pretty confident in my answer. "...You caught her yourself and handed her in to Gabriel?"

"Heh," the other me exhaled through his nose, amused, "I could see myself doing that... if I wasn't already madly in love with her. No, the one who handed her in was Arthur Kilvillain?"

"Bullshit!" I shouted. "The lightbulb wouldn't—"

"You're correct, she wouldn't." He quickly interrupted me. "However, her obsession with making Arthur 'pure' and 'naive' caused all this. Arthur, he believed Gabriel's words that he would find a way to cure Adel of her corruption."

"..."

"And guess what he fucking did! He knocked Arthur out and hung Adel!" His roar full of rage was so loud that I nearly felt my ears bleeding.

Eventually, he calmed down, and continued calmly; coldly, even. "So, here we are, the lowest day in my life."

Then, he gently rested Adel's body on the floor before digging his hand into the wooden platform and breaking off a big splinter of wood. Standing up and dusting his pants, he turned toward me.

"I know what you're thinking right now. Yes, I'm real. Yes, I am—or rather—was you."

Pointing the splinter at the Void lord, he shouted.

"And yes, I'm going to kill this fucking bastard dead for trying to defile the memories of my beloved!"