Well, Ali Baba had them 40 thievesScheherazade had a thousand talesBut master, you in luck 'cause up your sleevesYou got a brand of magic never failsYou got some power in your corner nowSome heavy ammunition in your campYou got some punch, pizzazz, yahoo and how?See, all you gotta do is rub that lamp, and I'll say"Mister Aladdin, sir, what will your pleasure be?"Let me take your order, jot it downYou ain't never had a friend like me, ha-ha-haLife is your restaurant and I'm your maitre d'Come on, whisper what it is you wantYou ain't never had a friend like meYes sir, we pride ourselves on serviceYou're the boss, the king, the shahSay what you wish, it's yours, true dishHow 'bout a little more baklava?Have some of column A, try all of column BI'm in the mood to help you, dudeYou ain't never had a friend like meWah-ah-ah, oh myWah-ah-ah, no, noWah-ah-ah, my, myCan your friends do this?Can your friends do that?Can your friends pull thisOut their little hat?Can your friends go poof?Hey, looky here, ha-ha!Can your friends go, "Abracadabra, let 'er rip"And then make the sucker disappear?So don'tcha sit there slack-jawed, buggy-eyedI'm here to answer all your midday prayersYou got me bona fide, certifiedYou got a genie for your charge d'affairesI got a powerful urge to help you outSo what's your wish? I really wanna knowYou got a list that's three miles long, no doubtWell, all you gotta do is rub like so, hey-ohMister Aladdin, sir, have a wish or two or threeI'm on the job, you big nabobYou ain't never had a friend, never had a friendYou ain't never had a friend, never had a friendYou ain't never had a friend like meYa-ha-ha, wah-ha-ha!You ain't never had a friend like me, ha!