7. Gain and Loss
When googling the questions popping in your head,criticising herself for feeling this way, brainstorming for a good hour didn't work she wasn't sure about what to do next. There's a short yet true saying that ' your heart knows. ' her heart had all the answers she wanted, she knew what it was but didn't want to admit it. She was too much of a coward to own up to her feelings .
The only thing that could get it through her thick skull was Karishma her very own partner in crime as she likes to call it. They got along well because of their similar nature. Both cursed at each other one moment and laughed together the next. She texted her hoping for some answers.
Texts
Kritika :
EMERGENCY REPLY IMMEDIATELY
Karishma :
WHAT WHERE!!
WHO THE HELL DIED?
Whom did you kill?
Are we going to murder
Someone?
Please say yes
Kritika :
No one died.
I didn't kill nobody.... Yet
And NO we ain't going to murder anyone.
Karishma :
Then it's not an emergency but continue anyways. 😑
Kritika :
Bitch.
I think I'm going crazy
Karishma :
Correction
You already are crazy😂
Kritika :
Hahaha very funny
I'm serious, weird things have been happening to me lately.
Karishma :
🤨 Like what?
Are horns growing on top of your head or what?
Kritika :
No
Even worse.
I told you about my tutor right?
Karishma :
Yeah what about him?
Kritika :
I..
I get all fuzzy whenever I see him. I look forward to meeting him everyday. I can't stop blushing and I feel butterflies!? I crave his warmth whenever he leaves.
Karishma :
You still don't realise it ?
And I thought you were smart.🙄
Kritika :
What?
The hell are you talking about
Karishma:
You have a puppy crush on him 😍
Kritika :
WHAT THE NO ?!!
I don't have a crush on him!
Karishma :
Yeah whatever you say 🙄
This guy has managed to turn a bad bitch into a fluffy puppy 😂 Oh my my this will be fun.
Kritika :
Don't jump in conclusions on your own.
It's not what you think.
Karishma :
For once in your life. Just own up to your feelings bitch. What the hell are you so worried about. If being with him makes you happy then acknowledge it.
Kritika :
It's not that I don't want to it's just that...
I don't know. I'm not good enough.
Karishma :
Girl have your goldfish brain already forgotten the #1 Rule
You don't look down upon yourself.
Because when you look down the crown falls. This is not you. I thought we were over this self criticism, Kritika. You got nothing to loose. If you want him go make him yours. I know you can!
Kritika :
You know what you're correct. I'm not gonna let my crown fall just like that. Fine I do like him and I'll make sure he knows it.
Karishma :
THAT'S MA GIRL
GO GET IT!
Kritika :
Don't be too hyped up we need to think about what to do yet.
Karishma :
You don't have to do anything. Just be you . If he deserves you he'll fall for you. You don't need to change yourself for anyone.
Kritika :
You're right. I don't need to change myself 😊. But you surely do need to change that ugly face of yours 😂
Byeeeeee~~
Karishma :
YOU
Come back here NOW
Ugh I hate you.. 🤬
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She knew it was risky , he was older and more mature than her. He had seen many girl a 100 times prettier than her and who knows even dated a few or is dating someone. She may have shrugged off that thought but the possibility was still there.
He saw her as a kid because of their age gap which wasn't that long according to her. 5 year age gap wasn't a problem but her being a minor and 14 on top of that was. She had just started her teen years and he was already about finish his.
She knew all of it but. Desire . Her desire seemed to have blurred her thinking. Her desire for him. Her desire for his warmth, for his care was too strong. And her love for that rush of adrenaline wasn't helping either. It was risky and she loved it. Him being unreachable just made her want to reach out for him more.
She knew that she shouldn't like him. But she couldn't help it. The way he cared for her never failed to make her feel all warm and fuzzy. It was just a crush and would probably fade away as the time goes.
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To say that he was sad would be an understatement, he was beyond devastated. Was it really that easy? Ruining such an old friendship just like that? Choosing toxic people over real friend. Was it really worth it? Gaurav wasn't mad or disappointed. He was hurt. After all he had done for Sahil that's what he got.
Gaurav and Sahil grew up together. They were more like brothers than friends. While Gaurav was more of a logical person Sahil would usually let his emotions take the best of him. Despite their differences they got along well. Both prioritized their friendship over any other.
They did have disagreements and arguments here and there but nothing could compare to this. Sahil had been acting distant since the start of their college 2nd year . He would avoid hanging out with Gaurav as much as he could. Hide things from him. And he had also started to smoke who knows even drinking.
When Gaurav noticed that as anyone would he tried to talk to Sahil about it. All his attempts to talk to Sahil never succeeded. After all this he still wasn't willing to give up Gaurav still had some hope that he could bring his friend back. But today was the last straw. Sahil himself ended their friendship. " I don't want to be friends with you " those 8 eight words finally left Sahil's mouth.
It may seem like a simple sentence but to Gaurav who treasured his friendship more than anything , those words seemed like end of his world. He wasn't able comprehend what just happened. Although we know that people come and go in our life, sometimes it still hurts.
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Now Gaurav was a stranger to his childhood friend and A crush of girl he just got know.
If Gaurav lost Sahil's friendship. He gained Kritika's liking too. It's just that he was unaware of that reality.