my not so far past

i woke up after that encounter and walked into The kitchen while my father was making lunch "Woah dude you look like shit" my father had said I flashed a sarcastic smile "thanks dad"

i grabbed my plate and put some food on my plate Adam stopped me in my tracks "I smell liquor" my father said worriedly "it was just a bit" "don't lie to me please" "couldn't you have waited Till you got to The party to start drinking?" "nope," i said as I popped open a beer bottle and started chugging it in front of him, his face was of utter disgust dad was getting older i had seen and more vulnerable his beard now graying his long black hair with white streaks staining it, i walked out of The door and went to The party, Adam had heard a knock at The door he opened The door his heart sank he was staring into The mask of a project red member. meanwhile at the party which is somewhere im never at i spy Cecilia she's quite cute for a rich bitch her round harry potter ass glasses her plump body girl could be a supermodel..least in my eyes, only red flag she dated our fuckin teacher i dapped her up and asked her if she'd seen Conan or Melissa "no sir" she said softly, and there they were the wonder twins they are the youngest in our little friend group Conan being 16 Melissa being a year older, Conan's neon yellow hair with a semi Mohawk shown bright as the fuckin sun in this lit up the ass party room, they always wear this tank top with the nirvana logo and some ripped jeans, in all honesty, their transition, is working that's for damn sure. Melissa came looking cute as a button, as usual, she's small for her age but she makes up for it in the fighting abilities that even rival mine I've known her since she was a little thorn in my back love her, hair pinned back her cat-like ears flapping cuz of the loud music she has this blue crop top and short skirt on most people would cat call her but she always spends her time huddled up next to me people don't even try a good idea too cause I carry my sword on my back everyday which doesn't protocol the sword is only out when combat training is happening but since I'm graduating soon, nobody gives a fuck i walk around with my little mystery gang following me like we're in some damn scooby doo cartoon i spot my boy Niko I put my hand out telling them to wait here, I walk up to him looking like new money fresh Nike's like he just bought em blazer jacket i damn near developed another crush on him then i remembered how after dating him for a while he spoiled all other male partners cause they all couldn't compare i think he caught me lookin at him cuz he touched my face and said "ya know we can get out of here and sneak somewhere" i pushed his hand away and smirked "nah man i still tryna forgive you for what you did" "fuck did i do?" i growled jokingly "bro after you dumped me for that Bimbo Sarah i tried to date other men but they were all shitty ass partners compared to you" Niko pushed me a bit too hard almost as if my words stung him "you might wanna put your drink down Niko dont want it spilling on your new shoes" i say walking back up to him "oh so we really doin this?" "i don't know are you gonna push me again?" he growls and waves his hands in my face in a threatening motion fortunately wonder woman Cecilia comes and grabs my arm "control your man," he says "i will in return control your mouth," she said walking me back to the group "this why I fucking hate men" suddenly my phone blows up with a barrage of texts I open my phone and its texts from my father this ain't good i thought "where the fuck are you?" "hey son come home asap" I cursed under my breath and grabbed my car keys and walked off with my friends following behind i got in my dads old 1972 Ford Pinto. and put in a cd to calm my nerves my favorite songs are on that playlist but there's something about the song that played next..how to save a life by the frays reminded me of a friend Melissa caught wind of my mood and sighed "strange its only been 2 years since Pandora" she made a cutting motion that hurt my soul Pandora was one of our friends despite being the youngest of the Group Melissa had always known everyone i knew shes pretty much the founding member of our friend group. Pandora had killed herself 2 years ago, at least that's what the police report said, we believed it as long as we could but I'm sure she's still out there I turned up the music to get lost in my feelings for a bit i turned down the music and got to the house lights were off "shit" I grumbled i walked out of the car and told them to stay in the car I walked into the house with my key, i turned on the light and i saw my father gasping for air blood surrounding him "FUCK" i screamed i kneeled towards him "I'm fine" he said weakly "come on I'm gonna drive you to the hospital come on" i tried lifting him up checking his pulse the room went quiet his eyes grew pale and i could feel he was gone i cradled my father in my arms "don't do this to me dad please" I rocked back and forth sobbing quietly i walked back to the car and got in my friends are kind enough to not talk to me and all i said was "he's gone" silent terror struck their hearts they all loved my father almost like he was their father hell he was everyones father now he's gone i drove melissa home first then Cecilia then Conan i got a text from melissa i stopped the car in its tracks "i called some people to help get your dads body out of the house there gonna have to keep you away from the house for a little bit ill keep you company in my apartment i love you" she sent the kissing emoji she always sends i could only text back "ilyt" i was too sick and tired to write it out like i normally do i drove around for a bit and ended up at her apartment i knocked on her door and she opened it and welcomed me inside i looked at the couch she had made it up as if it were a bed, shes always so considerite she kissed my cheek and nuzzled me "ill be in the kitchen cooking breakfast for tomorrow" she said softly I laid down on the couch covering myself in a blanket i was haunted by night mares and flashbacks i woke up nauseous i covered my mouth and rushed to the bathroom and puked i got up and washed my hands and face i went back to sleep trying to get the nightmare from my head….