When the Dream is Over

It felt like years since I'd seen the face of that place. I hadn't realized when, despite all the complicated feeling I had yet to unravel, that place had begun to look like home. As pleasing as that warm feeling was, I pinched myself so as not to forget, so as not to get used to such a life. But I had already forgotten most of what I used to be.

Valhalla stood right before our eyes, as peaceful as always. The same scent of wet Earth, the distant voice of the waterfall and the wind sweeping through the forest all around our hidden haven. The crooked path as clear as ever, seemed so welcoming. It had been a while since I'd walked on it.

And the first thing that came to view was the mound on which Prophet lay sleeping all alone. My eyes always went to him before anything else, even though he was no longer under that stone. I knew in my heart that Prophet had already moved on. Yet, there she stood, as always, keeping him company.

The door to the church was wide open, meaning morning had already come to the Valkyries.

"Hoooome!!!", yelled Lubbock as he ran inside, throwing his arms in the air.

The heavy air that surrounded me when we left was completely gone now as I watched him go, smiling.

"Hmm, your longest time away, boy?", asked Sight.

"Hardly", I replied with a smile, remembering the centuries I had spent in the underworld with Lucifer.

Sight patted my back and started towards the church before being intercepted by Lady. She had been alarmed by Lubbock's yell and had come down.

"Where the hell...", she was fuming, as she bonked Sight's head (she jumped into the scene, catching Sight's head on the way), "...have you been?!!!"

She hadn't been expecting us. And for good reason. Anyways, I knew I was next.

"Aha, Lady", Sight went on as if the bonk hadn't happened, even though he was rubbing his head, "You are sprightly today."

"And you...", she glared at me.

A shiver went down my spine as she shot lasers from her eyes. The fact that she said no more made it even worse.

"Oi, you lot!", another voice joined in, "Long time no see!"

It was Deli. My eyes lit up just seeing her going about as usual. She was pretty much all healed up. Although she looked really weak, I had never seen her more beautiful before. I smiled a big smile in reply, totally forgetting that I was about to get it from Lady.

"Oh, welcome home, Deli", said Sight.

"That's my line, you old fool", she replied.

"Ahaha, I was just reminding you", Sight followed her inside.

I'd have done the same if I hadn't been caught by Lady. It was then that I realized why Lubbock had been the first to run inside and why Sight so casually pretended everything was fine. I should have done the same. Unfortunately, it was too late.

We ended up going back up the mound. I was sure she would give me an earful and stab me with her hateful, condescending words but surprisingly, none of that came to pass.

"So where have you all been?", she asked, "Is the matter resolved?"

I reported to her all the events of Agartha and Shamballa and how we'd run into Sight. Of course, I didn't tell her about Kiria or how Mer Claire knew my mother. Those things weren't important, I thought. It had been a very arduous month.

"Anyways, Lady, there's something I was wondering", I asked, "Why did you send Lubbock there? You already knew what that place was, didn't you?"

"Hmm. It just so happened that everyone was busy. I intended to send Deli there. But...", she gave me a menacing glare, "Someone got to her before I did."

"Ah...ahahah...I see", I averted my gaze.

"But it's better that it was him that went there. Things might have been messier if not for him", she then looked at me with a smirk, "Why? Did you think I was making him face his past or something?"

"Err...", I nervously chuckled. I had indeed thought that.

"Well, if it was someone else, I might have done so. After all, there is no atonement until you stare your sins right in the face. But that is not the case for Lubbock. Regardless of what it is, facing it won't have any effect on him. He doesn't regret anything and he isn't afraid of anything. Unlike us, he isn't looking at his past at all, he is only awake to the present and the future."

That sounded very Lubbock, indeed. He was just that easygoing.

"He once told me...", Lady seemed to be remembering something, "At that time, he looked to me like a person filled with nothing but hate. But he said to me that he hated no one. Even now, I find it hard to believe those words, even though I know very well they are true."

"Why did you send me with him then? You didn't even say anything when we left."

"I didn't say anything because this isn't special. For Lubbock, this wasn't personal at all. Just a mission he needed to accomplish. As for you Seraph, if not you then who would see everything they are. If you want all the colors to shine, you paint them on a blank canvas. You should remember everything, every color and someday write our story. A proof that we were here."

A blank canvas? Is that what I am to her?

"If that is what you want, you could just reveal yourself to the world. I'm sure with all you guys have done, you'll never be forgotten. You'll all be heroes of justice", I answered, rather uninterestedly.

She chuckled, perhaps realizing how I was taunting her morals.

"Justice? It doesn't exist. And if it does, it certainly isn't something as great as they make it out to be. We will never be heroes. And that is because there are no heroes. And that is because there is nothing we humans can build without first destroying something else. A world full of hope, justice, peace...a paradise. I think you saw for yourselves what an attempt to find paradise would lead to. Don't you think it would be pointless for God to exist if humans really were capable of building a paradise?"

I'd have liked to ask why, despite all that, she was continuing to fight. But I didn't say anything.

We stood there in silence for a while, listening to nothing but the wind that blew across. I took it in, the familiar view and the scent and just being there.

"Feels like home", I muttered without realizing. Then I felt her eyes on me, she was smiling wide. When I looked at her, she looked away again.

"When this dream is over and we're all back on our own paths, I wonder what we'll all be like then...where we'll all go...?"

I wondered if such a time would come. I had never entertained the possibility that this could all be over someday. But the red sky that hung above our heads seemed to be telling a different story. I sighed. More than anyone else, I wondered where she'd go, if she had a place like home. Jean V.? He was already...

Then perhaps Chopper. But he'd already given up on her and ran away. I wondered if this person that was a home to all the rest of us had a home to return to.

"Lady, I remembered something", I said, "That little girl we were talking about earlier. I'm sure now, that she is someone from my own memory, after all."

"You remembered?!"

"Not really but...hmm, I'd like you to help me remember her somehow. I really feel like I need to. At the very least, she isn't something that I want to forget. I don't know how it happened in the first place but I just get the feeling that I shouldn't let it happen again. So, help me. I want to remember who she is."

"I see. Then I'll do my best."

That was a promise. With that decided, we headed back inside. I still needed to meet Deli and everyone else.