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Retiring as an Incompetent Queen

“Down with the villain!” The townspeople rioted at the gates while Yu Yan calmly sipped her tea, occasionally nodding and raising her fist along with the riots like she was cheering on a football match. “Down with the villain!” she hollered along with them, on the balcony above. One of the townspeople snarled, “Do you have no shame? You kill us, and then you mock us?” Oh, right. She blinked, remembering. She was the villain. Oops. It had been two weeks since Yu Yan, a lazy millionaire’s daughter, transmigrated into the body of an incompetent Queen in a novel she read. Twenty years before the actual novel takes place, the villagers are set to riot and take over the Kingdom. “Aiyoo, if they want to riot, let them riot. If they get tired, send them water. If they need more people, go send the guards to riot with them. Easy.” She’s read enough books to know that the butterfly effect is dangerous. But this time, she won’t die. “Belluse, have you made the preparations?” “Yes, Your Majesty. The carriage is ready.” Fake her death, run away to the villages of the neighboring country to her secret mansion, die there, and hope for the best. Let the male lead sort out the country in twenty years. Of course, she didn’t expect the male lead to come find her. “Uh..Your Former Majesty…” He hesitated. “Your personal attribute says ‘Immortality.’” .... *updates every Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays* *600-1.2k words each chapter* *starting to get published on Royal Road* *contact me on instagram @enna.core for questions or just to talk*

incarnadine · Fantasía
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24 Chs

Curveballs are Thrown

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Curveball: an informal term for something which is unexpected, surprising, or disruptive.

----

Yu Yan disliked politicians. Which was ironic, since she sort-of was one.

But what she hated more were idiots who refused to see what was right in front of them.

"You're seducing my father!" screeched the red-haired Aria Carrion. "You-"

"Miss Aria, I am not seducing your father nor do I have the intention to do so." Yu Yan was casual but firm. "To be honest, I just want my pork ribs."

It was true.

Even if this world didn't have BBQ sauce, Yu Yan just wanted her ribs.

She loved eating pork ribs. It was her second-favorite food after black pepper crab.

The butcher Mavis Carrion massaged his forehead, pulling Aria back with one hand. "I'm so sorry for this, Ingrid." He looked at Yu Yan apologetically.

"It's no problem, Mavis." Yu Yan smiled, but it was distant. "But it appears I am not welcome here. This is the fifth time. I might be visiting another butcher's next time, apologies."

Mavis made a pained expression, but he didn't stop her. "It's alright, I'll wrap up the ribs."

It had been more than a month since Yu Yan had settled in Rook and had gotten the administrator position. To the citizens of Rook, Yu Yan was well-liked, and held one of the higher positions in town, equal to almost the Lavers'. Alessia had been very generous in giving her power. Yu Yan handled the logistics of Rook's system from behind the scenes, and Alessia would use her competence as a stepping stone.

Even if Yu Yan would make sure that Alessia had nowhere to step to.

But Yu Yan had made friends with a lot of people.

For a person like Yu Yan, Mavis was a nice friend who occasionally gave her discounts on pork ribs on the rare chances that she visited his shop.

But his daughter was another story.

Aria Carrion was pretty enough. But due to Mavis' first failed marriage, she quickly became known for being overly protective of Mavis, to the point where she would immediately turn into a harpy to any person who dared to approach her father.

'Did father-cons even exist?'

Yu Yan was tempted to get rid of her.

But even she had a heart. Right?

Ring-ring.

The bell at the butcher's front door rang, and Yu Yan quickly turned around, narrowly avoiding a hanging string of sausages. She squinted at the entrance, which now held a familiar face.

Belluse's flaming red hair was seen as she entered the butcher's, with an urgent look.

'Belluse?'

"Lucia?" Yu Yan asked, confused.

"Administrator Signia." Belluse was seen heaving, as if she had rushed here. "It's important."

'Belluse rarely panics…'

Yu Yan turned to the dark-haired Mavis, and smiled apologetically.

"I'll have to trouble you to save the pork ribs for a bit. I'll pick them up later."

After an understanding nod, Yu Yan stepped to Belluse's side.

The faithful maid-turned-assistant lowered her voice.

"The Delacartes are planning to visit."

---

Rook was scenic enough.

It was almost like the small towns in the anime movies that Yu Yan liked to occasionally watch.

If Yu Yan was travelling via helicopter, she would likely have seen a patchwork of colorful tiled roofs and cobblestone streets, along with the occasional farming fields. It even had good weather. Rook was far from magic, action, and Durendal. An almost perfect location, really. The only difficult people that Yu Yan had to deal with were the mayor, the merchants, and the odd flea, like Aria Carrion.

But today, the streaks of cloud against the cornflower sky now resembled pieces of shit.

"I was having a good day," Yu Yan grumbled, "why those people have to come today? Tch."

'What a shitty day.'

Yu Yan might've seemed hard-working to outsiders, but that was just her outer personality. In reality, she didn't like to do much work. Her laziness had followed her across worlds.

The logistics of the town were really quite easy to manage, once she got the hang of it. At the beginning, she made a couple mistakes, but she adapted to her new job quite nicely.

She was living an easy life, with a high enough monthly salary. If the salary didn't help, the yield of her investments in several businesses were enough too. A respected public figure.

A good result after a month.

Now, the visit of a viscounty to an extremely minor town?

Belluse sighed. "It was an unexpected visit, Your Majesty. That lady was surprised, too. There was no prior communication."

The sight of the usually calm new administrator fuming was evidently a surprise to most citizens of Rook. The pair attracted many eyes and whispers, but Yu Yan didn't care.

She was tempted to grab Orion Delacartes by the collar, smack him to Earth, and lock him in a room with her father.

Orion would definitely go crazy with all the nagging of, 'Take over the business! Take over the business!'

Yu Yan tsked again, waving Belluse off. "Now that they're here, have to prepare. Nobles are nobles."

Yu Yan's accent, which she usually kept in check, appeared again.

Belluse hesitated. "Do you think they'll discover our identities?"

Yu Yan breathed, calming herself. "Only nobles with the rank of count and above are usually sent on diplomatic envoys. It's unlikely members of a viscounty will know my face, but we'll have to be careful. We don't know for sure if anyone associated with Rella will come along."

It had only been a month. Why now? She had spent the first weeks of said month going over the butterfly effect that the System had warned her about, but she had given up. It was impossible to go over every single element of this world.

She wasn't the OP lead who picked up new skills and harem members every time she breathed. So why did life have to keep throwing only her curveballs? She wasn't a baseball player.

What power would she have?

She looked up at the shit-resembling clouds.

'Tch.

What a bad day.'

----

Maevri Delacartes was welcomed by a graceful-looking administrator and the middle-aged mayor.

Maevri was one of the Delacartes triplets: Maevri, Mariana, and Mallev. Mallev had tagged along on the journey, and now was feasting his lustful eyes on the young administrator. He was treated with calm indifference.

Her brother always messed everything up.

Surprisingly, Maevri was welcomed in the administrator's mansion, which looked even bigger than the mayor's. Swooping Resilian-style architecture and grandiose furniture proved that the lady was likely a runaway Resilian noble. Surprising, but not significant enough to report to the Duke. After all, everyone knew about the neighboring kingdom's turbulent situation.

Well, it made the job easier, anyways.

She didn't like to associate herself with insignificant people.

"I'm here to teach you basic air magic." Maevri beamed, clapping her hands together.

The mayor - was it Rook, her name was? - froze. The administrator only blinked.

"Pardon?" the mayor questioned, setting down her teacup.

"Mariana, my sister, has come up with a plan to strengthen the Duke's territory."

'With her upcoming engagement to the Duke's third son, it's a contribution,' Maevri thought internally.

Maevri picked up a biscuit and nibbled on it. "The plan includes teaching all border town heads basic magic in order to defend themselves from invaders. With the Resilia situation, I'm sure you all understand."

'The incompetent Queen's suicide, and the mass noble execution.'

The two nodded, almost in unison.

A pause. "When would Your Ladyship like to begin?" the administrator asked, politely.

"Right now." Maevri said casually, ignoring the surprised look in their eyes.

She just wanted to get this over with right away.

Maevri was only here because of her family. Mariana's unlikely engagement just meant more work for Maevri.

It was said that in the Delacartes viscounty, the first daughter was willful, the second daughter was selfish, and the third son was lustful. Everyone was wondering who the Viscount Orion would appoint as the inheritor of the viscounty. Now that the first daughter had secured an incredible stroke of fortune as a potential ducal consort, that left the selfish second daughter and the lustful third son. Even the commoners were said to lament the Viscount's bad fortune.

She and Mallev were sent to better their public image.

Stuck with a useless person who lusted over everything in sight, Maevri just wanted to go home.

She started her short explanation.

"Elevyar is the kingdom of air. Like Resilia is ice, Evangeline is fire, and Likator is earth, we have an abundance of air mages. There are four Specialities: Summoning, Manipulating, Sensing, and Shifting. But both of you will likely specialize in the former two. We'll just teach you a summoning and manipulating skill each, and we'll be off."

Mallev licked his lips. "Sister, you can take the mayor. I can take the lady here. You know, numbers in power."

"It's power in numbers, brother." Maevri sighed. "And you're using it in the wrong context. I'll take the administrator, alright?"

It was hard feigning politeness. Maevri wanted nothing more than to smack Mallev and never speak to or see the mayor-administrator pair again.

"But-" Mallev whined.

"Now."

'This fcker…'

Mallev reluctantly skulked to the other side of the couch, where he started grumpily gesturing towards the middle-aged Rook.

Maevri was left facing the pretty administrator.

----

It was obvious the two nobles didn't want to be here.

Accompanied by two maids and a guard, the sister had on a forced smile while the brother had on a slimy expression that made Yu Yan want to throw up.

Admittedly, the body she transmigrated into was quite attractive, but that didn't make it any less weird. Besides, he looked barely fourteen.

"So, let's continue." The sister was said to be named Maevri, and the brother Mallev. Apparently, they were triplets. The oldest triplet, according to Belluse, had recently secured an engagement with Duke Rella's third son on pure luck alone.

Likely, the Viscount has blackmailed the two into contributing something.

Maevri blinked.

She had crimson hair that resembled Belluse's, but slightly more carrotish, with wide green eyes and a small nose. Yu Yan had somewhat realized that the customs of each Anisa kingdom resembled a respective continent, and their features as well.

Belluse was said to have been half Elevyarian, and had similar features to Maevri.

"Air Summoning's pretty easy." Maevri summoned wispy traces of silvery-looking magic to her fingertips. "And Manipulation." After she bent her fingertips slightly inwards, the magic followed, the air forming into a whirring spherical orb.

It was Yu Yan's first time seeing magic, but she controlled her fascination, placing her focus on the tiny motions that Maevri made.

Then Maevri relaxed her fingers, and then the orb faded away.

"It's more reliant on will. There's magic inside everyone," she explained. "You just have to feel the air around you, will the magic to your fingertips, and use that magic force to shape it." The noble struggled to reach a comparison.

"Take it as a blacksmith's forge," she finally said. "The magic is the forge, the metal inside it is the air. To shape it, you need to heat it up, or will it in this case. I don't know how to explain 'will,' so you're on your own."

'Such an informative explanation.'

Maevri gestured to a maid behind her, who brought two copies of a book over.

"The viscounty will give the books to you two," she said. "A beginner's guide. You can keep it."

Yu Yan maintained a polite tone. "Thank you, Your Ladyship."

Maevri paused. "No thanks are needed. I'll be back tomorrow to check on your work."

She got up, signalling Mallev to do the same.

"We're going now," she said lightly.

Yu Yan saw the guests and Alessia out, and opened the book.

She sighed.

'Time for an all-nighter.'

I personally like pork ribs a lot. And pepper crab, too. Chili crab's really nice too ;-;; Expect to see a more detailed exp. about magic in the next chap! As always, gift, like, vote, comment, and drop power-stones as you will!

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