webnovel

Let's Get Down to Business to Defeat the Buns

If Jay had to describe the feeling of having your various selves recombined after a Fork, he'd probably ay something along the lines of, "Take that sensation when you jerk awake after dreaming that you slip, mix in a 3 am epiphany about the tip of the tongue phenomenon from earlier in the day, then add a pinch de ja vu. Let concoction bake in the mind numbing you feel during a boring lecture then season with the quick pain and satisfaction stretching after a long flight and you'd get something somewhat reminiscent of whatever the Catch up on Media and Memes tasked Jay brought to the new Consensus of Mind that made up the mind of Jay Alfred Cason Prime. He returned to consciousness clutching his head in maniacal laughter, then realized it was just the free-form verse of the Humanity Galactic Anthem. After the last chorus completed he looked down from the rather ribbon like long logo filled Flag of Humanity and sat down at his InGen-Annuity Terraforming System Station. He mindlessly clicked through the End User Liscence Agreement, Terms of Use, You're On Your Own Kid Waiver, and List of Forbidden and Copyrighted Lifeforms. His computerized mind absorbed the required information in moments leaving him nodding to himself in agreement to the Banning of the New Ugandan Crimson Echidna.

His list of Missions began to populate after he agreed to the stack of documents.

Prime Directive Mission - Make Planet Rowling hospitable to human life before the first batch of Vacation Tier Colonists arrive. Time 15 Sol Years.

Bonus: Have 5 Creature's Genome Templates reach 1000 subscribers by Fans within the first 5 years.

Early Bird Goal: All colonized planets must have a marketable mascot. Have one in place before the colonists arrive for Silver Tier Physical and Digital Resource Upgraded.

Stretch Goal: Have your assigned Planet Reach Meme Tier Status before your colony sets up its Warp Gate in 20 Sol Years.

Cracking his virtual knuckles, Jay queued a Playlist of Authentic Montage Music from the 1990`s and got to work.

9 hours later he got his first simulated ecosystem running. As it fast forwarded the populations a look of abject terror crossed his face. "How does a lifeform based on rabbits become so savage? They even eat the arachnid mounts they domesticated..." He sighed and crumpled up his notepaper and tossed it at the hologram. Somehow the System interpreted this as a desire to test survival from a asteroid impact. As the dust cloud created an ice age the Bun race began to dig massive cave like Warrens among the more volcanic regions for warmth. The exposure to the noxious fumes somehow made their brains grow as rapidly as their horrible teeth to combat the neuron die off. This led to the simulation locking up and erasing itself after tripping the alarm for No Intelligent life Dum Dum. Jay gave a signature sigh, "OK clean slate, let's not use the Earth critter templates this time."