Memories: Secrets

I was paralyzed. The thought was so startling that it was enough for my mind to go into red alert mode and that itself was enough for me to return to normal. Too late though did I realize how bad of a decision that was.

My mind was spinning, my body was sore and.... wait, why the hell was everything so white and bright? The whiteness was so blinding that I almost confused it with flashlights if not for the slight color difference. Thank god mum forced me to take those color lessons and whatever she thought was supposed to be ladylike and whatnot.

One of my hand that was already attached with tubes reached over to cover my sight from the whiteness that occupied the room just when a groan echoed in the blindness, well I'm guessing this is a normal room in a place called Acadia that is located in a city called Louisville that is part of Kentucky which alternately is part of USA which is a part of North America that is part of this pathetic earth, no offense my dear earth, which completes the universe or solar system, whatever you prefer since I'm not burning down in hell right now although my head hurts like a bitch which is the only place I'll be going to after I die seeing as my deeds deserve a standing ovation from none other than my father himself who totally thinks opposite of Jesus considering himself as the god of the Troys thus which leads me to the obvious result I have at hand, that I'm in a damn room. I am rambling, more like panicking.

Alright, deep breaths, you aren't paralyzed actually, it's just the medicines or well the shock - the shock! Everything comes crashing down into my head as if pushed by an invisible force through some locked door, that damned door or well I'm finally out of my paralyzed state but then why doesn't my body say so? Or well in other words, disagree?

No matter what was the case, I didn't get to think much about either of it since I was soon being awakened and finally, oh god thank you I was finally able to feel my body and believe that it wasn't paralyzed, thank god, I just can't thank you enough. No, not you dad, I don't even plan on thanking you for as long as I am alive even if you'd happily let me go for Acadia discarding your personal benefits aside rather than being nosy and selfish.

"Good morning, Oraía Koimoméni." My eyes flew open upon hearing the Greek term and what surprised me more than actually hearing someone say it because believe me that itself is a huge surprise was the voice of the person who'd spoken it, if I wasn't wrong which I'm not too often then I could swear on Lottie's grave that it belonged to Kieran, I'd know that voice anywhere just like I'd know my father's voice anywhere.

By the way, Lottie was my pet dog as a gift on my 6th birthday. The poor thing had such a short life that it died only a year later and I was so saddened by it's death that I stayed depressed for another year. So technically I wasted a whole year which I do not regret at all. Besides, that year was the worst one spent of my 18 years of life that I'm glad to have wasted it.

Anyways, back in present scenario though I'd preferred to remain in the past one, I'm staring wide eyed at Kieran, if I'd be getting a dollar for every time I made a correct guess I'd be a millionaire by now, who was seated on my right looking back at me with a goofy grin and gleaming eyes that, I myself accept, made him look so very cute and boyishly handsome which made me question myself that why hadn't I noticed how good looking he was until now? What was I doing? Thinking if he didn't iron his clothes or how white his teeth were?

This is unbelievable. I should be shocked by the shock that shot through me sheep's ago yet I'm shying over my shame shows. Incredible, I should totally deserve an Oscar in the 'Most Bizarre Daydreamer' category, totally going to make the top of that list.

God, what's with the attitude? I haven't had one like these in say like a 3 years! And the last one too was when I'd ended up in the hospital for getting 'Two broken ribs and a major concussion' all because of some stupid ball that of course is rotting away in its grave now after I burned it to ashes for invading my personal space and touching me, well theoretically hitting me. Well the past aside, besides I already forgave that devil's ball years ago, the point is hospitals irritate and annoy me. And right now? Everything's heightened. I feel like a vampire.

You know the feeling when you're overcome with so much rage that you see nothing except red and the cause for the situation you're in right now and you just want to burn it, kill it or whatever, just to somehow get rid of that reason? Do you? I'm particularly feeling like burning that devil's book down right here and right now so that it can annoy that devil's ball too. And to do so, I need to escape.

Escaping has never been a challenge to me seeing as most of the time I was indeed making plans to escape from my own house, thus it's more of a hobby to me. However, my situation and the surroundings I'm in right now definitely doesn't seem like a piece of cake. Even if I do manage to escape from this room, I know there must be a dozen doctors, nurses, surgeons and whatever this place consists of waiting to take me down and deter my escape. Another reason why I hate hospitals, it's impossible to escape from here.

"Raven? Are you even listening to me? Raven??! What's w-"

"I'm here, I'm here!" I covered my ears which was hard to do so considering his hard grip on my shoulders and quickly interrupted him just so he'd stop screaming and shaking my shoulders like a manic.

Gladly, he stops. "Oh thank god. You weren't saying anything and just staring into space that I though you'd frozen. You scared me there for a second." He rushed it all out in one breath as if afraid I'd freeze again and he'd loose his chance to tell me what he wanted too. I doubted otherwise.

Since I couldn't just say that I was obsessing over how cute he was, I just rested my palm against my forehead and in the weakest voice that I could muster said, "No, no. I was just thinking about how I ended up in here and all." Then as I remembered what he said in the end, I added, "Why would you be scared?"

For a second, he looked confused just like I did right now and then when realization did dawn upon him, he turned sheepish and I almost, almost coed at how cute he looked but at the last minute controlled my hormones. These little thingies are totally going out of control today. What drugs did this hospital gave me?

"Uh, I was just worried. You looked pretty worse back at the library. Even Alicia was looked scared for once."

"Where's Alicia?" I murmured after a while with a confused frown.

"She had to take a call from someone. Which reminds me-" He glanced down at his wristwatch with a frown, "-it's almost been 10 minutes since she left, I wonder where she is."

"You sure she only said about a call or she actually left?" I raised an eyebrow at him.

"Yeah..." He glanced at me with a frown for a few minutes before nodding, "I'm sure."

For some strange reason, I doubted him. As if my sixth sense knew he was lying and was now alerting me with the red siren. I stared at him with a straight face, hoping I looked like I was just thinking about something and not trying to figure out if he was being honest or not. Seconds went by with nothing to support any of my reasoning. By this point, I'd have much success with a blank sheet of paper even. You know a glimpse into his soul would even be nice.

Then as if someone had turned off all the lights in the room, everything turned dark and gloomy, just like it had happened earlier today when we'd started the tour. Then not even a second later, thoughts or more like memories came crashing down to me, it was like every single memory of every single being that the person was thinking about in this world was crashing into my head, like an information overload. I wanted it to stop, for everything to go away but it was as if I was invisible and trapped into this darkness. Not exactly trapped.

White spots started appearing into the darkness just like some of the memories started disappearing or retreating. It was like I was witnessing the molecules inside a flickering light bulb. Just when the darkness fully faded away, last of the memories managed to snuck into my mind and then everything turned white which I barely registered since all I could think about was that last memory.

"Uh, Kieran?"

"Yeah?" I looked at Alicia while also paying attention on Eva from the corner of my eyes since the doctors had said she can wake up any minute now. Well actually that was news from an hour ago but still, I couldn't risk leaving her alone, not after what had happened in the library. The stakes are higher and I can't disappoint my father like last time, especially not now when I've reached so far. It'd be both a shame and disappointment.

"Kieran? Are you even listening?" Alicia raised an eyebrow at me and I shook myself out of my own thoughts. I cannot get distracted, I need to concentrate more. What if the others found out that I wasn't doing my duty properly?

No, no, I don't want to to go back there, I need to concentrate.

"I'm sorry, what did you say?"

"I need to take an emergency call, will you be okay on your own?" She gave me an apologetic face.

"Of course, I'll be okay. Take as long as you need, I'll be waiting right here." I gave her a smile which she returned but instead with a little nervousness.

It almost made me frown, but I quickly covered it with the smile and gauged her reaction. Now that I'm looking more closely, she looks pale and so nervous that I wonder she isn't visibly sweating yet. Also, she was fidgeting with her phone and biting her lip that I noticed was too a nervous habit. For a minute, I was tempted to ask what was wrong, but then thought the best of it and kept quiet. It could be personal and she'd tell me if she wanted too. But then why did my gut say otherwise?

"I'll be back as soon as possible." With that, she turned away and left, not once glancing back. One would almost toss it aside as nothing but seeing her nervous state, I added that too to my list of suspicious things. Something that I'll get to after Raven's up. For now, I need to concentrate on her and make sure she's okay. After all, they'd execute me if something happened to her.

Looking now at Kieran, those same questions that I had right when we were starting the tour and I'd had a similar experience like this one, Kieran had said exactly something like protecting me. Was this all connected? If yes, then how? In what way? And again, who was Marcus truly? Do I know him? Do I trust him?

I need answers. I have to find out what's going on here, what's going on with me. The dark moods, disappearing walls and now, thoughts. This isn't all just some coincidence. Something strange is going on here and the only person beside me that does know about it is Kieran. Why not ask straight from the source.

"So..." I began in a casual voice which surely managed to get his attention, "Care to explain about what's going on in here?"

He frowned, "What do you mean?"

"You know exactly what I mean." I narrowed my eyes at him.

He remained quiet for a few seconds, still looking like he was genuinely confused but he wasn't fooling anyone now. When he still didn't say anything for a long time, I sighed as if I was dealing with a child.

"The dark moods, protective demeanor. Rings a bell?" I thought it was best not to mention about what I'm experiencing right now, considering if I do succeed in getting answers out of him first.

He sighed, "Uh, well I did apologize for that. But anyways, back at my home when I was 14, I had a sister exactly your age who died in a car accident and surprisingly she resembled you quiet a lot. You remind me of her and I took it upon myself to protect you. And well for the moods, I sometimes get a flashback of how she died."

I stayed quiet at that, not that Kieran noticed. He looked lost in his own thoughts as if reviving some old memory with a forlorn expression. The way he said it made it almost believable to any other person that there really was no other motive and the accident was indeed the only cause. Any other person would have gladly accepted his reasoning with a little sympathy. To me? It was hardly another excuse, more reason to be suspicious of him. Call me crazy or whatever but right now my sixth sense was poking it's ugly head and screaming 'liar! liar!' and I just couldn't ignore it.

For a second, the thought of reaching into his mind and reading his thoughts again seemed so tempting. It wouldn't hurt to do so, right? Besides, he didn't even find the last one out and it'd just take a second and I'll be done. Yet no matter the consequences, I just didn't want to do it again. Mostly because of that voice in my head whispering the possible outcomes of this experiment, making the cons outweigh the pros every single time. Believe me, I was almost an ant's distance away from doing so when I backed away and totally neglected the option as if it never existed.

Since I didn't have any other options left now that I crossed out the only option that I did have, the only thing I could do was either to go along with Kieran or call his bluff. And because I liked to stick to the truth, I went with the latter option.

"I have to admit, that was pretty good of a reason that definitely would've fooled anyone with no eyes. So, are you gonna tell me the truth yourself or do I make you?" I rolled my eyes at him just when he stared at me in equal shock, as if not believing it really was me who said it. Can't blame him actually because people tend to have that effect when they've seen my sweet, naive self for too long. Maybe its time to put up a tough demeanor now.

Kieran looked too dumbstruck to even say anything for a few seconds, he looked so pale that for a second I even considered him as a part of the room though he looked too beautiful for a statue so that thought was gone as soon as it came. I wonder what Kieran would think of me if he knew what kind of thoughts I had about him. After all, he did say he considered me as a sister and no more. Now that's something to discuss for another day since I'm in no mood of dealing with awkwardness today. One step at a time, Raven, one step at a time.

Just when Kieran did open his mouth to speak after his long shock recovery, the door to my room opened and Alicia came striding in while frowning at her phone. Perfect timing and opportunity for Kieran to shut up and me to fail in getting any answers at all. Couldn't she have entered like just a minute later? Not that I'd have made much success by then but still I'd have gotten something or even a word out of him. As if she felt the obvious tension in the room herself, she looked up and glanced between the two of us in confusion as if noticing us for the first time. At first she looked happy upon seeing me awake and well which soon morphed into confusion upon seeing the expressions on our faces.

"What's going on here?" She asked slowly as if dealing with two predators while she alone was the prey. Her steps were vary and cautious, waiting for one of us to leap so she could run for the exit. Not that we really would do so.

"Nothing. I was just telling Raven about how she ended up here." He gave me a showstopper smile and just before he turned away, something hard flashed in his eyes upon seeing my expression as if a warning 'not now' and then he gave all his attention to Jess who looked as confused as I did.

No, actually I wasn't confused. I knew exactly what Kieran was trying to tell me and now it was up to me to obey it or not. Honestly I was tempted to do otherwise, I wanted answers and nobody, not even Jess was enough to get in my way to stop me from doing so. Believe me, I could've done it too. But the realization of that this must be something serious or private even that discussing it in front of Alicia was not appropriate hit me hard. Even if getting answers was important than confronting Kieran in front of Alicia, even if her presence was simply a hinder preventing me from getting my answers, I understood things. Things that must be discussed in private and not in presence of others no matter how close that person is to you. Some matters need to remain quiet. And so, for this only reason, I chose to remain quiet. That didn't mean I won't ask him again the moment I got him alone even if that meant asking Alicia to leave for only 5 minutes.

As I managed to get rid of my own problems, I saw Alicia had too and now looked simply worried. Whether it was because she was genuinely worried about what happened earlier or well some other reason, I couldn't tell.

"You don't remember what happened?" She asked me with a frown that made my own visibly show up for just a few seconds as I tried to understand her question. When realization did dawn upon me, I shook my head frantically and managed a chuckle even.

"No, no, no. It's not what you're thinking. I do remember that but I don't remember how I got here so that's what he was telling me." I smiled at her and saw her shoulders sag in relief. Maybe I could just ask in her presence seeing as Jess so much as cared about me but one look at Kieran made all those theories vanish into thin air. Or maybe not.

"Oh thank god. I thought there for a second that you had memory loss or something." She chuckled at her own crazy theory while making her way to my side of the bed that wasn't occupied. I scooted a little towards Kieran not enough to touch her thankfully as she climbed into bed beside me.

Once she was comfortable, she began, "So, how are you feeling?"

I though about it for a second then nodded, "Much better actually. My body's not hurting from the aftereffects of shock so that's definitely something."

"It is indeed. Since you do mention the shock..." She looked deep in thought but clearly Kieran caught up to her unsaid words.

"Alicia, no. Let her rest." He told her firmly while I glanced between the two of them in confusion. What am I missing?

"Kieran, she's okay. Besides, sooner or later, the others will question her about it. It'd be better if we all have the same story." She looked meaningfully at him, daring him to find faults in her logic and after a few seconds he clenched his jaw and looked away, murmuring something about how wrong this is. I frowned at both Kieran's reaction and what Alicia said? If by others she means the school administration, then was this really that serious?

"Now for the shock, do you know how it happened in the first place?" Alicia looked at me with burning curiosity but my mind wasn't focused onto her, it was actually seeing the events of the shock playing in loop.

The large empty podium in the VIP area, the strange book that appeared after a few seconds of staring hard at it then my mobile that lay atop on it and in order to get it, my hand made contact with the strange book that sent me flying into the air with such shock and intensity that I crashed on to the ground in pain and right before I fainted, Kieran came to my rescue. Now that I think of everything that happened in that way, I notice something strange. Putting aside the fact that I don't have any interest in touching strange objects, the only reason I touched this one was because of my phone. My phone that had somehow magically appeared on that book on its own and I'd been so excited to get it that I accidentally made contact with that book and now I'm in a hospital. The panic attack wasn't something that would've gotten me to a hospital after all. And the panic attack had happened right after I lost my phone. It couldn't have just gotten on the book on its own. Something seriously wrong is going on in that library and I ne-

"Raven? Are you okay?" Alicia and Kieran were both looking at me worriedly which for some reason made me annoyed.

"I'm fine guys. And well for the shock, it must have happened because I'd lost my phone and had a panic attack so that must be it." I didn't meet any of their eyes but instead rested my head back on the cushion and closed my eyes.

"Are you sure? Because the way you were screaming didn't look like a panic attack..."

I sighed, "Alicia, I've some worse panic attacks and the fact that I didn't have my pills on me made it worst, so yeah that is it." I yawned just to make a point, "Can you two leave me alone now? I'm tired."

They remained quiet and for a second I had a crazy thought about Kieran reaching into my head and reading my thoughts, no he wouldn't do it.

Why not? You did it too.

No-

"Of course. Come on, Alicia." I felt Kieran stand up and a few minutes later, Alicia followed. I remained frozen in spot until I heard the door close and then sat up straight in bed. The movement made me slight dizzy but I'll live.

My eyes immediately went to my phone on my right, surrounded by medical equipment and some food items. I grabbed it and unlocked the screen after seeing I had a message from an unknown number, that itself made my heart race.

They know about you. They're here and coming for you. This time, you're warrior won't be able to save you.