Last Struggle

Because they are far from the comforts of the infirmary and the hospital, the physicians have a hard time delivering the care that their patients need. They could not give them the necessary treatment because of the lack of supplies and equipment. There are not enough tonics for sanitation and wound cleaning. Feet and hand injuries that needs the equipment from the infirmary end up in amputation. It is the only way to prevent further infection. Since they are in the middle of a cold meadow wasteland, it is their last resort.

As the physicians are healing the soldiers, the general wastes no time, and marches back to the Capital godspeed. Gianni is all alone in a cart once more. He just finishes dressing the wound of his last patient. The next one jumps on him as great cuts on his torso he shrieks in pain. He is losing too much blood.

Gianni gras the last of the tonics and pours them on the wounds. As he grabs the sterile needle and thread to suture the wound, he touches to open tissues. He tries to close the wound but it is very stiff. His patient screams in excruciating pain which resonates throughout the entire army.

Gianni forces it again and tries to do it, but it is difficult. He tries again and once more, but the more he retries, the more he realizes that he is killing his patient. The pain and the shock, the shrieks and struggles. His patient's time is night. A lot of blood has already been lost. Gianni skips suturing and moves to wrap the patient's torso, so that the cuts would close. He applies pressure on the bandages. However, it is all for naught.

The patient slowly turns pale. His dilated brown eyes become dull and lifeless. Gianni checks for a pulse, slipping his hand into his carotid. All he feels is the icy cold winter seeping into the patient's body. He is gone.

"Stay with me," Gianni speaks to his patient. "Hey what's your name? Stay with me." He tries to talk to his patient, but it is too late. The other knights sees the events as they transpire. They cover the corpse and wrap it in a brown fabric.

Gianni looks as the patient he fails to save goes away. His blood still dripping from his cut. It is an emotional horror that he finally experiences. The feeling that you are almost so close to save someone but you fall short. The feeling that you did everything you could, but you fall short. The feeling that you can't do anything to save your patients. The pain that every physician must go through.

Suddenly, his vision becomes blurry and his strength abandons him. He can no longer stand up. He falls to his knees and his body falls on the cart laying supine on the wooden floor. He falls to unconsciousness until the duration of their trip.

Where am I? Gianni thinks. Everything is dark in here.

"You are a failure," Gianni hears a familiar voice. "You are not a true Saint-Amour. You are not my son." It is his father's voice reminding him again and again of what he is.

"I've changed," Gianni shouts. "I am a doctor."

"You are a disgrace," gales blow against him. "You failed to even save a single patient from demise. You don't deserve to live." Suddenly, everything around him collapses. The darkness crushes him as he hears his father's voice of disapproval.

In a great gasp, Gianni wakes up in a comfortable bed. He looks around and sees his things from his room in the royal palace. He thinks it is another dream, so he pinches himself, then punches his knee. He is in his room. All of his things are there, arranged in order except for the door which is left open and the scattered chamomile on the floor.

"You are awake," another familiar voice comes in. "I made these for you," it is Gabriel, holding a bowl of hot bouillabaisse. "You passed out on the way here. I heard you saved a lot of knights."

Gianni stays quiet and stares at Gabriel blankly.

"Here, have a taste," Gabriel places the soup on a bed table. He puts the table before Gianni. He gives him a spoon. As Gianni is about to receive the spoon his hands tremble, dropping it on the sheets.

History repeats itself? He thinks to himself. I failed that soldier. I failed as a physician again.

He tries to lift the spoon once more, but his spirit is nonexistent.

"I'll feed you,"Gabriel volunteers grabbin the spoon and filling it with bouillabaisse. "Open wide," he says, as he slowly shoves the spoon into Gianni's mouth. "Does it taste good? I made it myself."

Gabriel notices some soup on Gianni's face and wipes it. As he touches Gianni, he feels the frost of winter on the latter's pale cheek. It feels as if all the cold seeped into Gianni's body. "Have some more."

As the two stay in the room, the rest of the entire royal Capital prepares for war. The news of their enemy's occupation of the south spread throughout the nation like wildfire. It is an unforeseen tactic whose probability defies the rules and laws of war. No one from the highest ranking generals and the astute, wise, and knowledge advisors sees it coming. Most of the southern towns and cities of the Grandiflora Domain have been annexed by the Essenians. Now their armies march towards Tracy to end the war once and for all.

Gianni has an early morning appointment. He is to report to the highest ranking physician in the academy, his father. The fate of the soldiers in the fortress, where they were holed up, their cause of death and his treatment and intervention. He exits the palace and heads for the Gallia Academy of Medicine.

Tracy's streets are bustling. Not with transactions and the songs of bards, but with the march soldiers, the talk of bakers, the cry of babies whose families are leaving the Capital, and the hourly announcements that tell of truths and lies about the ongoing war. The weather is like any other winter morning in the Capital except for the voices of fear and paranoia.

Gianni makes a right to Chelsea Street from which the façade of the academy stands from a distance. As he pulls the reins to go slower, every bit of memore from his past rushes to his head as he rides on the streets where he once walked as a student. Everything is the same in Chelsea Street. Cafes and bakeries line up the block. The same pharmacies and houses stand at the exact same spot as Gianni remembers.

He finally arrives at the gate of the academy. The guards recognize him and galdy opens the gates for him. When he enters, a winter breeze blows on his face, brushing against his pink pale cheeks. It is the same breeze that blew on his face years ago, somehow he remembers. Instead of going straight into the main hall, he takes a detour and wanders around the academy.

He visits Hibbard Hall, and the very sight of the building excites him. He remembers those moments when he is young, eager, and motivated to carry on the family legacy. He goes the dormitories and remembers the times when he goes on some sleepovers with his friends.

The academy is the same as before, except for the air of tension and some new faces who are running around the academy.

After looking around and reminiscing the memories of days past, Gianni finally enters the main hall. The smell of mahogany is the same as his mind tells him. The clear light that shines through the crystal window panes remains every right. He climbs the winding staircase up to the fourth floor. The same winter scenery of snow and sun flashes back into his mind as he sees glimpses from the window by the stairs.

He finally arrives in front of his father's office. He remembers standing there when he still has the pride that his father has for him. The pride which fueled Gianni's desire to be the greatest doctor in Gallia. The same pride which motivated him to pursue perfection that his father pressured onto him. And the same pride which created the disappointment that tore him down when he failed to achieve perfection.

Gianni slowly pushes open the door. The spacious office that he once proudly enters is the same as it is now. When, he comes in silence permeates throughout the room. His father is in his study right across the room. When Gianni clears his throat, he gets his father's attention. Without any hesitation, his father stands up and rushes to him. Gianni is taken aback. He does not know what to do.

Suddenly, his father gives him a warm embrace.

"I'm so worried. I'm glad you're safe," tears slowly stream from his father's eyes. Gianni feels something that he has never felt in a long time, the embrace of a parent. Gianni's tears also stream as he returns the embrace. After the heartwarming reunion, Gianni gives his report. He is about to leave his father, when he stops him, "Be safe out there. I'm proud of you."