Trial 1 - Part 5: Dark Desires

This woman, she saved me - From this places darkest pits of hell. Her and I are enemies, and yet she saved me. Her face was the same as mine; forced to wear the pig mask.

We found an exit, yet it wouldn't budge - We were trapped inside this place, and sooner or later only one of us would come out the victor. Taking a look back at my actions, the only thought that could come to mind was that if I was truly a bad person? No, no it was the mask - The mask made me kill and cannibalize those people, and yet this woman who was forced to wear the same mask as me was helping me - Her fellow contestant. I couldn't, no, I... I don't know. Does the mask reveal our true nature, or was I simply hiding behind a mask the entire time. A visage that in truth was false?

I don't know, I don't know.

My mind would not allow me to comprehend what had happened. I had killed people and did things I never would've done, and yet I was not a monster. No, I'm not. I don't think I could've done that if I was truly a person who meant to do harm. The idea that someone could do such horrific things was a truly chilling thought. To think that she was in fact a fake, a mere disguise of what she truly was, and she was a kind-hearted person who wasn't capable of committing any of the horrible things that I was.

Could she truly be a fake? What if she was a real person? What if she was truly a wonderful person who wanted to help me and I just, I, I don't know how to describe it. I truly, truly, couldn't believe that this was a real person, I mean look at her eyes. The eyes of someone who was being forced to do horrible things, she couldn't, she, she, but I knew deep down that she wasn't capable of killing and butchering, she was a kind-hearted person.

But at the same time, she has a mask, she has a mask on her face and I'm a monster because of it. I can't change that, so what's the point in saying anything? I'm a monster, I'm a monster, I'm a monster.

A deep voice rang through my head, it was the voice of my inner monologue. Yet it wasn't just my voice that I heard, I could also hear the voices of other people, and I knew that there were people there with me.

This was a place of death and hell and I couldn't, I could not help but think about that. I was in a place where I could've been killed and eaten and there were other people with me, I knew that it would happen, I didn't think that I was the only one who could die in the arena, but yet I heard them scream out in pain, crying out in pain and they weren't fakes. No, not them, not them. There were others that I could hear, people in pain, people who could be eaten by me, but I couldn't. I couldn't because I was a monster, I was a monster.

No, no, I'm not, I'm not.

As the voices seemed to get louder, as though they were calling out to me, as if they were calling out to me, the voices seemed to get louder and louder until they were practically shouting at me. The person with the mask, I knew that it was real, it had to be, she had real eyes, she could see. She was real.

But I couldn't, no, I didn't know whether it was real or not. I'm a monster and she's fake, she's fake, she's fake. The people seemed to shout to me and I wanted to scream out in pain, to scream out that it was all a lie, a lie, a lie, but I couldn't. I was a monster and she was fake, and yet there were real people with me, and I couldn't, I couldn't believe that it was real, she wasn't fake, the people weren't fake, and yet I... I couldn't, I couldn't.

I couldn't even try and find out whether she was real, whether the voice I was hearing was truly hers, whether it was even real at all. No, no, I couldn't, I couldn't. And yet the voices were getting louder and louder, shouting at me, calling out to me, and it was as if they were begging me to do something, to find out if she was a real person.

I couldn't.

But she had to go. With her back turned from me, I slowly made my hands around her neck, and squeezed as hard as I could, she wouldn't be able to go any faster if she wanted to. I was squeezing, harder and harder until she was a lifeless corpse. I heard a loud thud, it was her fall to the floor, I was squeezing too hard.

I was a monster.