Zoddie might come between us.

What's going on between you and Zoddie?

Jay asked me as we were discussing in his room.O decided to go visit him because I was free at that time and I felt like talking with him.And I guess I'll tell him about everything and the new development about Zoddie.He was always my gist mate and the one I'll tell anything .My one and only cousin brother.

I don't understand Jay,I answered. Where is that question coming from?

I didn't want us to argue about anything or to exchange words .So I just decided to be cool no matter how bad it gets.

I'm sorry,this question is just crystal clear so I don't know what you mean by you don't understand. He answered in a very cold way.Whenever Jay gets like that,I just feel a very intense hatred for him.He should know that I'm very sensitive and no one knows that better than he does .But still he doesn't like to handle things in a calm way with me.

Besides he is acting like he owns me .I'm just his cousin sister but here he Is acting all defensive like he's my boyfriend or something. Its normal to care for your sister but his is getting irritating. He can be very possessive and rude.

I'm not going to answer that question because I don't know where it's coming from and I don't know why you're asking.Besides last time I checked you're only my cousin brother and not my boyfriend. I don't owe you any explanations. I only tell you what I feel like telling you and that's all.You shouldn't be seeking for explanations just like that.

I don't know where you got any information that shows there is something going on between us or whether it's just what you're thinking in your head or maybe you just saw something and you're reading meaning into it.Tell me first what made you ask the question and I'll surely give you an answer.

Not like I'm hiding anything from you,there Is nothing to hide even.So just calm down and keep a cool head ,we can actually discuss like adults and not argue over silly things.

But you're the one arguing Betty,hope you know?He said looking straight into my eyes.I just asked you a simple question and you're acting all defensive. If there's nothing going on why are you getting all worked up?I'm not demanding for any explanations though,but..

Anyways never mind.I made the mistake of worrying over what's not my business .

Look Jay,this is not time to start playing the victim ,I'm not saying you shouldn't worry about me but that's really a weird way of doing that if I must say.I mean there are simple ways to do things.The tone and manner in which you asked me the question sounded so authoritative and possessive,like you've got to understand I'm not your property. This isn't really the first time you're acting like this over a guy. I've not said this before for reasons best known to me but I think it's high time I did ..You've formed the habit of getting so cold and all worked up whenever I tell you about a guy. I thought it was only pertaining to Zoddie because of what happened between us from the beginning but no.I found out it wasn't just about Zoddie but maybe mostly about him.When you saw me with Cole some time ago,you acted all weird towards him and the poor guy even noticed and complained to me.

You're my brother and not my Boyfriend Jay!So I prefer you respect me and know your boundaries and limits too.

There was a long term silence in the room.He was just looking at me boil in anger and I just realized I may have over reacted .I can see that he was shocked to hear me say those words to him and I too didn't want to hurt him by saying those words but I just couldn't hold it in.As much as I'm okay i let it all out,I was also feeling guilty. Maybe that's just his way of protecting his own. I said to myself .

I need to try to understand him a little .Oh what a mess,I should apologise,he seems hurt.

Betty,

Yes Jay I answered with my mouth shaking like I was being queried in a court.

There are just somethings that are better left unsaid and I just wish I could tell you those things one day but I don't know how it will all go down.I just want you to know that I really care and worry about your well being and if I'm being too protective,its because I know what is out there and that's all I can do for you.

Hearing him say those words really sent cold chills down my spine.I was so sorry.

I'm sorry Jay I said as I stood up and hugged him .

Everyone isn't perfect,I just hope we all play our cards well.