Chapter 8

I can't believe I am reading this.

As I read page after page, my heart feels heavier and my head feels lighter.

All these incredible words that he's written, every word shows how much he loves me and how much he's missed me.

My fingers trace the dried up tears of his on the page. All the love I have been seeing in his eyes, I am getting to read them now. It reminds me of the time when I 1st woke up the look he gave me when he realized I woke up. It spoke volumes.

Now literally reading what he's been through while I was at the hospital brings me down to my knees.

When I reach the last entry, I realize it's made on the day I woke up. He's not written anything after I have woken up. Now that I think of it, it seems so long since I have known him. But in reality, it's just been a day.

I can't believe, it's just yesterday morning that I woke up. I feel like I am living this life for days now.

As I glance through the last page...

I read. ..

To my Queen...

I loved you once

And I will love you twice

I loved you then

And I love you now

For you once lived in me

You will live forever.

The moment I read this, all I feel like doing is running to him and falling in his arms.

He's my peace.

My heaven.

Without thinking I get up from the bed and walk towards the door and open it.

My brain shouting at me to stop but my heart just needs to see him once.

When I open my door I can see his door right across mine.

It's closed.

But I somehow know it isn't locked.

My feet take me across unknowingly and I turn the knob and open the door.

My heart is hammering.

The room is pitch dark. I realize then that the sun has already set.

How long was I in there reading the diary?

I didn't realize when it had gotten dark outside.

This room has enormous windows too and I can see him lying on the bed from the moonlight seeping through the windows.

He's in deep sleep.

I walk closer to the bed, I see his back is turned towards me.

Oh my.

He's not wearing his shirt.

And the blanket is wrapped until his waist.

That's when I notice a huge bandage on his shoulder.

Oh god. That's when I realize he's been hurt from the accident too.

My heart constricts to know that he never bothered about his pain.

It's always about me.

I have an urge to reach out and touch him. Feel his soft hair in my fingers.

As my hand reaches out he turns around and faces me in his sleep.

I quickly retract my hand.

I don't want to wake him.

What would I even tell him?

Why am I in his room?

It would be embarrassing.

Just when I am about to turn around and get the hell out of here, I hear him call my name.

Ah-Oh.

BUSTED!

I turn around and see him plop himself on his elbow and rubbing the sleep of his eyes.

"Hey what's wrong? Do you need something? " he asks worriedly .. his voice raspy from sleep.

"Uh...No...I.." I stammer as I try to reason as to why I am here.

"Are you alright? " he says as he gets up from the bed clearly worried.

Shit.

What do I say?

This isn't how this was supposed to go. What do I tell now?

"Ah... it's time for my tablet, and I don't know where you have kept them." I lamely find a reason.

"Oh.. yeah they are here with me." He switches on the light on the nightstand and fetches the pills from the drawer.

"But wait . . You need to take them only after dinner. What's the time?" He says and starts looking towards the clock.

7.30

Wow.

I didn't realize it was that late.

"It's almost dinner time. I'll come and make something. Give me just 2 minutes I'll be downstairs. " gesturing to himself.

"Oh of course. I'll wait downstairs." I say my cheeks red from embarrassment.

I walk out of his room and walk down the stairs.

What the hell was I thinking? Walking into his room like that. I have officially lost my mind after this accident.

I decide to sit in the living room and wait for him to come. He comes down within 2 minutes wearing the POKEMON shirt.

Damn. There is something about that shirt that makes him look cuter.

"Hey.. what would you like to eat? " he asks.

"Uhm... I am not really hungry. We just had lunch. "

"That was almost 4 hours ago." He says and chuckles.

"Hmm.. okay.. anything light would be fine," I say. I am not hungry at all. After that eventful afternoon, I have seemed to have lost my appetite.

"How about a sandwich? It's light, easy, and also healthy," he says excitedly.

"Yup that would be great. "

And within minutes we are gobbling up his egg cheese sandwiches.

"You cook really well," I say as I reach for the water and take my tablets.

"Thank you. I just know what you like and what you dislike," he says with a wink and takes the dishes in.

From the place I am sitting in the living room, I can see the whole of Mumbai through the enormous glass windows.

It's glowing with different lights in the dark.

Funny how one day I am going to bed thinking what branch do I choose for my college and the next day I wake up in a completely different place at a completely different time.

As I am lost in my thoughts, I realize the pills are making me drowsy. It surely has been a long day.

He walks in as I get up to retire for the day.

"So.. you wanna watch T.V or something? " he asks.

He looks more energetic of course because he has had a nice nap, but I am exhausted. Mentally and physically.

"Ah... I was thinking I would just retire for the day. The pills are making me drowsy and my head hurts. "

"Oh of course. You need to take a rest. Call me if you need anything. " he says with a smile, even though I can see he is disappointed. He was looking forward to spending more time with me.

I want to too. I want to get to know him more, but I am exhausted.

As I reach my room I just flop on my heavenly bed and fall asleep that very second.

I can feel the fresh autumn airbrush my face as I sit in the backseat of my car.

I always enjoy sitting in the backseat with my earphones on, while my parents bicker back and forth in the front. Dad always drives fast just to piss mom off and you well you know mom is mom.

I open my phone to select another song when I hear my mom scream and I feel a sudden jerk.

I can feel everything happen in slow motion, where I could literally see the car slip off the bridge we were passing through.

The next second, all I can see and all I can feel is water.

There is water everywhere.

I can't breathe.

I am not able to open the door.

I feel helpless.

I reach out for my mom and dad, I realize mom's not moving and dad is trying to break the door, he is trying to get me out first.

And that's the last thing I remember before I pass out.

I gasp out loud when I feel someone shaking my shoulders.

I still can't breathe.

"Wake up Maahi!!! Wake up! "

I open my eyes and I am trying hard to get some air to my lungs.

Everything seems blurry.

"You are here. You are safe. It's just a nightmare. No water. See! Open your eyes love. Look around! You are safe.. you are with me." I hear him talk to me.

It slowly calms me down.

"That's good. . Take a deep breath.. in and out. .. in and out. .... excellent baby.."

I open my eyes slowly, I realize I am in the room.

He is rubbing my back soothingly trying to calm me.

No. No. No.

That cannot be a memory.

No. Please.

"Where are my parents?" I ask him, his eyes too wide.

"Please tell me that was just a dream. An awful nightmare. Please tell me my parents are alive!" I plead with him.

But his look confirms all I need to know.

It was indeed a memory.