Chapter:Blunder

"It was one thing to make a mistake; it was another thing to keep making it. I knew what happened when you let yourself get close to someone, when you started to believe they loved you: you'd be disappointed. Depend on someone, and you might as well admit you're going to be crushed, because when you really needed them, they wouldn't be there. Either that, or you'd confide in them and you added to their problems. All you ever really had was yourself, and that sort of sucked if you were less than reliable."

----Jodi Picoult.

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Elena

"I am pregnant",I snivelled as I lunged at Edward to make stop him from leaving. Earlier,again we had our regular fights....me urging him not to give me divorce and him ressuring me with a hefty alimony.I want money okay but I want this....the family ambience, the sense of security, him....

It had worked momentarily when he stood still, but a moment later he grimacingly went out, banging the door close out loud behind him.

"Shit",I had cursed as I flung a vase towards the door,shattering it thousands shards.I just then had thought that I had Edward in my clutch yet I failed.

Now watching the broken pieces,it seemed so repelling.I broke into a cold sweat as I realised that I was similar to the broken pieces since they couldn't ever be glued back. Those shards appeared then to be mocking and laughing at me on my wretched self.

True,I was worthless and bad but ultimately I was human too.I had my own needs that required to be satiated.Hence,I did what was needed to be done.I again became a liar and a trouper. But never had I before meant to be nor dreamt of transforming into such a shallow vermin.

Once upon a time,I too had been a decent girl with a loving family and friends.Now it was only a distant memory because fate had robbed me of my loved ones. I was left alone,an orphan in this vast barbaric universe.

I became something my parents wouldn't imagine me of,a vile manipulative lunatic.Yes,that's me.In the past few years, I stepped over so many other rich foul men that eventually I had lost count.They offered me opportunity and I paid them with my dignity.....on whom I later ployed against to distinguish them in their own ditch so that they couldn't take advantage of another Elena again.

I know,I was nuts and quite vengeful.I had to...

Now,I had another prey to feed off but it wasn't easy.My prey turned out to be smartest and largest predator of the food chain.Taming him as impossible even in his amnesia state.

Hence I had to fool Edward on sleeping with me but let me clear you the misconception,I wasn't the only one in the ploy....his mother devised the plan and well,I kinda executed it.

Shameless,wasn't it?Wanna know how I pulled it through....well let's keep it suspense now.

I was lured and hired by Edward's mother Erina to seduce him and distract him away from Blue.Thus,when didn't go as planned we took the privilege of his memory loss and I got married to him.

Erina was an Evil incarnation of Satan who thrived in the heaps of money and politics.The wealthy people are all schemers and conspirators, power hungry buffoons.

Definitely concocting against people was the standards of those rich self-righteous herd but for me it was sustainability. Tell me who would be a greater fool to loose a golden goose like Mr.Edward Hart?None,I guess except that puny girl.

To be honest,I had been jealous of Blue the moment we had met.Her presence made me uncomfortable so much so that whenever she was around I used dress up more and all.Her entire outlook and approach unnerved me even though I knew she wasn't as beautiful as me.If I was the trophy women to be showed off around, she was the unrestrained wild flame.Such contrasting women were we yet we both loved David and Angie.

Now you people might be wondering about me loving my kids.Well true,I was an awful mother to begin with and yes I did priotise my luxury over them....but I loved them in my own shitty way.

You see to be a mother,one needs to have a maturity, create a mental mindset for motherhood and I had none.Never was I meant to be a mother nor I wanted to become one.I didn't know how to become one even yet consequences left me so along with by making me a widow.

I could have tried to be a good mother if I ever felt secure as when my parents were alive....I didn't so I became absent instead.Blue was an intense girl no doubt but she had a depth that seemed so frightening to imagine...often at times she would look at me and believe me it felt like she could see through my pretense...

May be in another life we could have been buddies you know but now I ought to say she's a great rival, from whom if I lose against...I won't be ashamed.

She loves Edward tremendously yet she is kind of oblivious to it .....