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Marsy: Miracles on Mysterious Mars

Autor: Confused_Wanderer
Fantasía
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Resumen

Year 2080, humanity started colonizing Mars. It's a huge craze to go there, endless possibilities are waiting. Mostly youngsters are mad to go there. Everything seems to go well there. But smell of secrecy could be felt as one approaches Earth's so called twin planet. Deep down, something is wrong. Something unusual is happening on the big planet. Leaders are suspiciously good to each other there, a little too good. As our heroes dig further into Mars, it turns out Mars is not really what they thought it would be, it's more. What shocking secrets awaits our heroes? Why is a mysterious man finding some specific newcomers so desperately? Answer lies...

Etiquetas
8 etiquetas
# ACTION
# ADVENTURE
# COMEDY
# MYSTERY
# SUPERPOWERS
# CAMPUS
# MYTH
# FUTURE
Chapter 11.1 Truth Lies

[ARC 1: TO MARS, FROM EVERYWHERE]

[Talking in complex language]

???: It will be nice to work with you again.

!!!: I hate sarcasm. Stop with that, seriously why did the Leader decided to continue this plan anyway...

???: We aren't allowed to question that. We only execute plan. Nevermind it seems we will enjoy this mission.

!!!: Last time was a disaster if you hadn't forgotten already, this world almost slipped from our hand, those dammed so called Gods...

???: Only because we can't use our full power in this dimension...but that shouldn't be the excuse this time.

!!!: So what's the plan this time? The same thing may happen again right if we go the same way again?

???: We got weapon this time, we will just delete the specific time of the space when things start to go dangerous side.

!!!: And you know the side effect right? One mistake and we're screwed, along with the world.

???: And isn't that exciting? At least it's better than no weapons right?

!!!: Who knows...OH!

[Mars, Year 2050]

???: Ah here we are again, so those things call this Mars now. good na- WHAT ARE THOSE?

!!!: Looks like it's time for the next planet for life, they already sent rovers here, our plan is going smooth it seems.

???: And you are sure this is right path? Those rovers never appeared in our calculations though.

!!!: Chill, you overthinker. They should have overlooked unnecessary small details.

???: Okay you win, let's start

BOTH: ZEXV UQUZ

[A source of energy emits a shock wave]

???: At least it's still working...All clear, those stupid rovers didn't notice a thing.

???: Oh, new message

!!!: What...

???: As I suspected, this won't be a smooth ride.

!!!: Yeah, the power opening isn't working...

???: So we have to stay...time for plan B

!!!: Yes...we can just wait now...

A few minutes later, the small shockwave reached earth. Several people who were sleeping suddenly woke up, their forehead glowed a little, but almost nobody noticed, they didn't think about it and slept. Those who were in daylight couldn't notice. And those who did, nobody believed them. It never happened again, so they thought they were seeing things.

[DARJEELING, AN OLD HOSTEL]

Two friends were sitting on the floor. One with black hair and another dark brown, they were gazing stars while talking about beauty of night sky.

"Kalpurush is really interesting don't you think?"

"Yeah, it never gets old, such a beauty we see everyday, but never gets old."

"Ouch-"

"Bro, there is something on your forehead"

"Yes, it twitched a little, maybe firefly"

"Ouch, co-incidence"

"Looks like it flew"

"Bro you forehead is still glowing"

"Ah...yours too..."

"But there is no bug" the voice trembled a little.

Suddenly a voice echoed. It was voice of an old man on verge of death.

"Mars is not what you think it is... seek the truth, follow your light, seek --"

The voice stared fading...

The two felt chill through their spine.

Brown hair gathered enough strength to speek, "What was that?"

"Huh? I-I don't know, ghost?"

"Ram Ram Ram Ram"

Well they weren't really the coward type but hearing voice and the glow, caught them off-guard.

5 minutes passed. Black hair talked, "Ramuda didn't come."

"So only we heard it?"

"Apparently"

"Do a favor, don't tell anyone."

Black hair gave a sharp but frightened look, "I won't even if you request me to."

They sighed...

"So is it really me who wants to go to Mars?"

"And that's the horrifying part, I want to too."

"It's a deal then."

"Deal, and nothing happened today."

"What are you talking about?"

They forced a huge laugh to ease the pressure.

CHHAT PAR KAUN HAY RE (Who's on the roof)

Angry voice of Ramuda was heard.

"RUN" they both went to their room and slept.

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Anonymous_Demon_07
Anonymous_Demon_07Lv2

Okay here comes the great review of self proclaimed Master Blaster Plaster Trasher... Ugh... I guess I got a little self burn... Ahem Anyway here comes review after I read first five chapters. Pros Of Novel: 1- The detailing of characters are great. Emma Fisher already became my Waifu and Alex and Ravi are best male characters. Lucy is still vaguely discribe but not every character can be discribed in just 5 chaps. 2- The plot is intriguing. All these things like it's futurestic yet there ain't much need to describe atmosphere is what makes reading iy convenient. 3- Till now, none of the chapter is anything boring. They piqued interest and were able to maintain that.(No even I can do that... I can't do anything though) Now onto the Cons: Well there ain't much maybe cuz it's beginning or maybe it's just that good but here are some suggestions.... Try to maintain world building. The surrounding the crowd and even tiny things like rooms and halls. Even though it looks like there ain't any need to do that now and story is interesting. If you suddenly started world building all at once, it will become hard as well as boring. So If yoh start doing it now irrespective of whether it's needed or not with interesting stories still there, I think it would help you in long run. So Finally My 5 Start review cuz there ain't any flaws for now at leat.

3yr

Cynical_Stranger
Cynical_StrangerLv2

Not bad but far from perfect. I like "!!!" and "???" their chemistry is good. You have some grammar mistakes. There is a lack of description of the looks of the characters and setting. Paints a pretty foggy picture in the reader's mind. Keep writing and improving!

3yr
Confused_Wanderer
Confused_WandererAutor

As an author, I think I'm doing a good job. So without any shame (who knows me here anyway 😂), Five stars to the novel! Author is lazy though

3yr
bunnyrabbit
bunnyrabbitLv2

Okay, here’s my honest review. I’ll start with the title. “Miracles on Mysterious Mars”, sounds kinda interesting. It means that the setting will be in outer space. Next, the synopsis, I like that it’s short, concise, and direct to the point. It also mentioned that it’s in the year 2080, so I expect some futuristic gadgets and other sciency stuff. Lastly, the prologue, or was that chapter 1? I was confused. Also, though the grammar is passable, there were a lot of punctuation misplacements. Also, a piece of advice, instead of using (!!!) and (???) for unnamed characters, it’s better to use (Person A) and (Person B). Anyway, keep it up and keep improving, author!!

3yr
R_Twilight
R_TwilightLv2

I believe some more work can be done on character description. There are indeed some Grammer errors. Development of the plot and chapter to can get better. I have faith you have the potential to upgrade on this point 😉

3yr
iam_adh
iam_adhLv2

The story has much potential and I can see it going places. However, I know this story can be of better quality. The story telling could be better and more description would fit this story nicely. I hope you keep up the good work author!

3yr

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