He Who Makes Me Hope for More

Sleep.

All I wanted to do right now was to sleep. But sadly, looking at the pile of dishes on the sink, it would take a while for me to do what I really want.

It had been a week since Nicole's whispered words. A week of half being okay, and half not, honestly, I don't really know how to digest her words. Maybe I should just forget about it.

However, my body has other ideas, most especially my mind.

Images of me becoming pregnant again began to form. This time though, rather than being alone, someone was with me.

Duncan.

I sigh. This is becoming a habit of mine. I have only known him for a couple of months. So yeah, he had taken care of my kids for a month, but our interaction was different. I am not sure what we are supposed to be.

Friends?

Companions?

Lovers?

Nah. We couldn't be the last. But I felt my body began to flush when I remembered the way his hands glided on my skin. My body was responding to him, and all I was doing was just thinking about him.

It was a good thing that I was alone in the kitchen and the kids were watching TV. Otherwise, they might be asking why I am becoming red.

"Damnit, Duncan," I muttered, "What have you done to me?"

"Me? I haven't seen you in a while, lass. Why are you blaming me?"

I had to close my eyes and wield my body not to react, that I should ignore the way his voice sent goose bumps on my skin. And I should also ignore that his hot breath on my ear was making me wet in places that I thought would be dead.

"Because," I began. I leaned back a little so I could give myself some breathing space. Then I looked at the man/god who was wreaking havoc on my body. "My kids got used to you doing the dishes."

It was true. Duncan was the one who would wash the dishes when he would dine with us. Especially, during the days that my kids need to finish their home school requirements and I was trying to write.

He looked at the sink and shook his head. The pile of dishes on the sink was from this afternoon's lunch, and a snack that I didn't give, plus the pots I have used to cook dinner, and the evening dishes.

Duncan glanced at the living room where the kids were. They were laughing and enjoying the movie that Jane bought over. She was also in the living room with them.

"My aunt?" he asked. I nodded and he closed his eyes and rubbed the back of his neck. "Why am I not surprised?"

"Is there something wrong?" I replied.

"I got a message from her saying that you need help. I was thinking that something was wrong," there was a sound of irritation in his voice. "She can plainly tell me that you need my help. Why go to all the trouble to sound like you're dying or something."

"I'm okay, Duncan," I told him. He only shook his head and walked to the sink. He then started arranging the pile on the side. "I can do that later. I don't know where you came from, but from the looks of things, you are more tired than me. Leave it."

He gave me a sexy smile before ignoring my words and said, "Nope, you need to finish that chapter right?" I nodded and stopped. I had to close my eyes and remember that he was not looking at me anymore.

"Yes," I replied. "I mean, I can write it later..."

"But it won't feel the same as it is now," he ended for me. "Write, Julie. Finish what you can while I wash these. I will be talking to the two later about leaving things for you to do."

There was a disapproving tone in his voice that caused me to flinch. He must have glanced at me and caught my reaction, because he dropped a kiss on my forehead. "Don't worry, lass. They are okay, our kids just need to remember that they have to do their share of the work at home. I will not be grounding them or anything. That is your call."

He was right, whatever happens, it was me to decide what to do with the kids' punishment. Duncan never overstepped his bounds on that matter. Not once.

"I could give you a massage later, lass," Duncan said.

My body flared in response. For a woman who was called cold, around Duncan, I was different. I do not know how to explain the things I feel when he is around. It was like I'm not me.

"You are you, Julie," Duncan said.

"Are you reading my mind again?" I asked doubtfully. He was a god, so the ability of him reading minds was something I know he could do.

"I cannot read you, lass," Duncan replied, there was a slight pitch in his voice indicating that he was smiling, "you know that, what I can sense, is the aura that surrounds you."

I paused, trying to think of a good comeback, but came up empty. How the heck will I counter his words? I have been reading, researching about gods. Most of the info that I have on them were all verbal and written stories. None of the books and stories told me that they could be real.

Now that the wool is off, I am in a very different ball game. A game where the ball would never land on my feet, and if it does, I have no idea how far I could throw it.

"Does it apply to everyone?" I asked.

He paused on what he was doing. I guess he was thinking about how to answer me. And his answer shocked me more. "No, only you…and the kids come to think of it."

"You cannot read their thoughts?" I ridiculously asked.

"Yes, lass, I cannot read your children's thoughts," he answered, resuming his work.

I was lost for words. Was the thing that was happening between us normal? He was a god, and being god entitles him to the things that I cannot imagine. He has powers that I do not clearly understand, yet here he is, washing the dishes like a mortal.

Plus the sudden revelation that he cannot read all of us, baffled me. Why? I remember Angus telling me that he cannot read me as well. He was, after all, younger than Duncan. But this?

I sighed, closed my eyes, and listened to the sounds that were around me. The splash of the water in the dishes as Duncan did them. The laughter of the kids, and if I focused hard enough, I could also hear the sounds that were coming outside.

I knew something in me had changed. I could feel and see the difference. Whether it was Duncan's or Fall or Jane's doing, being mad at them will not be good. What I needed to do was to understand these changes.

If not…then I do not know what else to do. Because each day that passes, I am falling for the man/god behind me.

And I am afraid of its consequences.