Day 12 MORNING - THE TENT IN FRONT OF THE CAVE

"GOOD MORNING, Haruka-kun! Breakfast is ready, wake up!"

Huh? Breakfast? What's happening? When I opened my eyes, I saw a

girl leaning over me. The beautiful girl next door? Her cute sister? No, not

that…but seriously, who is this? Not that it really makes a difference!

The tent was certainly cramped, but not so cramped that she needed

to be practically on top of me! Her face…it's so close to mine!

"Oh, good morning. I'm up…er, can you give me thirty minutes?"

"That's what people say right before they fall back asleep. You don't

want to get up?"

More like I literally couldn't get up—both from a purely mechanical

perspective and a hormonal teenage male perspective.

"What's for breakfast?" I asked.

"Grilled fish and mushrooms."

I leapt up immediately, sending the girl flying out of the tent.

"Grilled fish?! Where?! Give it to me! Gimme gimme gimme! I need

fish!"

"Calm down! You just knocked me over, and you're not going to say

anything?!"

"That doesn't matter right now! Just tell me where you got the fish

from!"

"It's just fish! You still haven't apologized!"

She passed some grilled fish over to me, and I chowed down.

Fish. Wholesome, delicious fish.

"Er, are you crying?" she asked.

"It's fish!" I wailed. "Sweet, glorious fish!"

"You do realize you've been living next to a river?"

"I know that! Every day I stared longingly at the fish as I choked

down my mushrooms…"

The girl looked at me like I was insane.

I couldn't believe it, but it sounded like Class Rep and all the girls

had been eating nothing but fish. So. Jealous. Apparently that was the only

food they'd been able to obtain. One of the girls had Thunder Magic, so

catching fish was easy for them. Unfortunately, they didn't have any salt to

season it.

When the nerds were around, they told me that they hunted deer or

boar occasionally, but their staple protein was fish. They couldn't collect

mushrooms because of all of the goblins nearby, so mushrooms were a rare

delicacy to them. They wanted salt more than anything, however. Damn. If I

had realized earlier, I could've traded away my mushrooms and salt at a

huge markup.

She told me that the girls had cried yesterday over the luxury of a

mushroom and herb stir-fry.

Any successful country depended on trade. My isolationist policy

cost me a potential fish windfall.

For some reason, every single one of them gave me a fish. To thank

them, I made and shared some juice. They made a huge fuss out of enjoying

it. Some of them even shed tears as they drained their cups.

"Did you guys decide what to do?" I asked the Class Rep. "If you're

going to settle down here, maybe I should do some remodeling?"

I thought I could base my renovations on the old Imperial Hotel in

Tokyo. With all the stone, I figured I could pull it off. I'll become the Frank

Lloyd Wright of cave renovation!

"No, there's no need for that," she said. "We haven't made any final

decisions, but we're thinking about leveling up a bit and then trying to find

the town."

"Oh yeah," I said, "the mean girls were trying to hunt down the nerds

in town, I think?"

"I told you twenty times that we're going to apologize!" shouted the

Queen Bee. "What's wrong with you! We're not going to hunt them! And

his name is Oda! And we're not mean girls!!"

"Haruka-kun, you don't want to find the town?" asked the Class Rep.

"Living in a town sounds like a pain," I said. "I don't mind visiting,

but I wouldn't want to move there."

"Normally it'd be more of a pain to try to survive in the forest

surrounded by monsters," the Class Rep said. "But with a setup like this…"

"Oda-kun told us that anyone who wants to can become an

adventurer in town."

"I'll pass," I said. "I'll never be strong enough to be a real adventurer,

anyway."

Everyone stared at me in total bafflement, so I explained how I'd

gotten all my terrible skills.

"That doesn't make any sense!" the Class Rep said. "Someone

without any proper skills shouldn't be able to take out an entire pack of

level 5 kobolds, including the chieftain."

"Kobold chieftain? Who's that? One of the Queen Bee's friends?"

"I'm not friends with kobolds!" the Queen Bee cried. "And how

many times do I have to tell you that we're not mean girls?! Do I still show

up as 'Queen Bee' in your status?!"

She was so loud and obnoxious. Why did she always seem to be right

behind me when she started yelling?

"Oh yeah, I forgot to give this to you," said the Class Rep. "Here you

go. This was the kobold chieftain's bracelet."

A bracelet? It looks a lot like the one I have. Wait a second, they

make a matching set! A single person wearing both pieces from a couples

set was definitely a little weird, but maybe it was appropriate for a loner.

"The bracelet gives you a speed bonus when you charge it with

magic," she said.

"Speed bonus?" I showed her my other bracelet. "But this one raises

my power by one percent, yeah?"

"I see. You took out the leader of the goblins, too," she said.

"Defeating the boss goblin gives you a bracelet with a power bonus,

whereas the kobold chieftain's bracelet grants a speed bonus. That's how

Oda-kun and the others explained it to us, anyway."

Wait, were the leaders of the goblins and the kobolds a couple?

"Boss goblin? Another one of the Queen Bee's coworkers?"

"Stop! Stop lumping me in with them!" the Queen Bee cried. "I told

you a hundred times, I'm not any kind of monster! Do I look like somebody

who'd go to a conference for boss monsters?! And we're not mean girls!

Why don't you get it?!"

Yeah, even monsters wouldn't want to hang out with someone so

noisy, I thought. And all the kobolds are probably too terrified to attend a

monster conference, knowing you'd be there.

"I don't get it. How are you even strong enough to beat boss monsters

at level 5?" the Class Rep asked. "We couldn't take out those kobolds even

using our overpowered skills. How did you manage it?"

I hoped that I didn't look as stupid as I sounded. "Well, I attack them

until they die?"

"Yes, that's how it usually works, but most people wouldn't call that

a strategy."

Why is everyone looking at me like that? Was this what it meant to be

popular? Wait, no, they were looking at me like there was something wrong

with me. Did I say something wrong? How else were you supposed to

defeat monsters? Attacking them until they die was the only real strategy,

right?

"I'll show you how to catch some fish," said Vice Rep B with a wink.

"Watch and learn!"

She raised her right hand, and an orb of electricity appeared, almost

seeming to bounce from her hand. Why do I think of bouncing whenever I

look at her?

"Don't move!" I shouted. "Stay just like that!"

"What? Why? What are you doing?"

I took the orb of electricity that Vice Rep B made with my Packing

Magic and held it. Yes! Can I make it move?

I slowly repositioned the ball of electricity above the river and flung

it down at a fish. Yes! The fish floated to the surface of the water.

"I did it!" I cried. "I caught a fish! And used Lightning Magic!"

When I checked my status, sure as can be, "Lightning Magic" was

listed there.

"What just happened? How?" Vice Rep B asked. "How did you take

my magic?"

Vice Rep B jumped over toward me. So much…motion.

"Haruka-kun, what did you do?" the Class Rep asked. "Also, where

do you think you're looking?"

Class Rep was giving me a vicious evil eye. That's bloodlust if I've

ever seen it!

"I'm not looking at anything, okay? I was just studying her…

Lightning Magic? I'm not doing anything suspicious, right?"

"Why does every sentence you say sound like a question?" The Class

Rep shook her head. "Anyway, what kind of magic was that?"

"Oh, that was Packing Magic. I can use it to pack things up and move

them, and then I learn a corresponding form of magic from that. I mean,

that's how it happened before, probably?"

"Wait, it allows you to learn any kind of magic just like that? That's

totally a cheat skill!"

"No, the learning is probably just a side effect of Master of None.

According to the skill description, I can learn skills easily but they rarely

level up. That makes sense, right?"

"That's plenty amazing that you can just learn any type of magic so

easily," she said. "And it's functionally anti-magic!"

"Anti-magic?"

"Yeah. If someone uses magic on you, you can counter it, right?

Flinging back your enemy's magic back at them is called anti-magic. It's an

amazing skill. Well, at least that's what Oda-kun said."

"I'm not sure that I could use it to block an attack or anything," I

said. "It takes time to control someone else's magic with Packing."

Still, she was on to something. Infusing my own body with magic

used to be slow, but now I could do it in an instant. Maybe I could develop

anti-magic techniques through practice.

But right now, I had bigger fish to fry, literally! I also had to practice

my Lightning Magic, finish expanding my underground bunker, and I

hadn't had time to check my stats lately. Besides, I'm not fulfilling my

duties as a loner! Even though I was a shut-in, I had gone outside; even

though I was a NEET, I had helped the mean girls level up; and even though

I was a loner, I had invited twenty high school girls over, protected them

and showed them the ways of mushroom gathering.

I set out, and the high school girls paraded after me, whacking all

goblins that had the misfortune of crossing their path.

Whenever we ran into goblins, I disarmed them—lopping off their

arms when I didn't just send their clubs flying—and the parade of high

school girls behind me finished them off. This was my first time going out

with girls. Nothing more romantic than killing goblins in the forest. What a

murderous picnic.

How monotonous; our itinerary was apparently goblin killing, goblin

killing, mushroom foraging, mushroom foraging, goblin killing, mushroom

foraging, goblin killing, and more mushroom foraging. This is not the

romantic picnic date I dreamt of!

"Hey, Haruka-kun," said the Class Rep, sidling up to me. "How are

you cutting goblin arms off with a stick? Isn't it blunt?"

"Oh, the nerds taught me that. They explained that Cane Mastery

works best when I 'stab like a spear, swing like a halberd, slash like a

longsword.' So that's how I do it."

"Just by thinking about it? I don't think that expression was meant

literally."

"When Haruka-kun rescued us, he was using magic left and right,"

said one of the mean girls. "You're a mage, right?"

"Er, technically, I'm unemployed."

"Oh, right."

"You said that you don't have any proper skills, but I've seen you

move so fast it seemed like you were teleporting—are you sure you're not

using Super Speed or Ground Shrink?" Class Rep asked.

"He's obviously using Ground Shrink!" somebody called over.

"I think you're just talking about Movement and Walking?" I asked.

"You're telling me a skill that makes you better at walking actually

gives you extra Movement Magic?"

"I guess it's some kind of combination of abilities—does that make

sense?"

"You keep downplaying your skills, but they're obviously working

for you," said Class Rep. "I wonder what you'd consider a real cheat skill."

We had too many people to go rabbit hunting—all the rabbits got

scared off. So we just kept walking, taking out the occasional goblin as we

went. Whenever we ran into larger groups of monsters, I whittled them

down from afar before closing in to finish them off. All the other girls had

split up into "mean girl" and "vice rep" groups, so I was alone with the

Class Rep.

"Hmm, we're bound to run into a level 15 monster if we keep going

this way," I said. "Should we?"

"Can you handle it?"

"What if I sneak up to it and then unleash everything I've got? Do

you think that would one-shot it?"

"I see now," she said. "We were all fighting them as monsters, but

you've been thinking of it as hunting them like wild game. It makes for a

one-sided fight."

"Well, since I have no cheat skills, wouldn't they just kill me if they

got a chance to attack? I'm honestly kind of weak."

"Even with cheat skills, I think it'd be too dangerous. Let's turn

back," she decided.

"Roger that," I said. "Let's detour around any high-level monsters

and focus on taking out the weak ones."

"At this rate, we're going to make goblins an endangered species!"

"Oh, don't worry. They'll be back tomorrow."

"You sound like you've tried to wipe them out before…"

We hunted goblins until the sun dipped below the horizon. Then, we

went back to the cave. No extracurriculars for me! I was a proud member

of stay-at-home club for eleven years now.

"Good work today!" called the girls as we entered the cave.

"Uh…g-good work?"

Everyone looked exhausted. Better refill the bath.

I poured fresh water into the bath and, using Heat Magic, instantly

brought it to the perfect temperature.

"Bath time! Yay!" shouted the girls.

They stripped off their clothes as they raced toward the bath. They've

lived in the forest for too long! What a horde of lawless barbarians, I

thought. Are they going to trade their feminine wiles in for rippling muscles,

too?

"Don't get undressed before my innocent eyes!" I shouted. "This is

sexual harassment!"

I escaped to a recently built storage room and worked on expanding

it. A twelve-tatami room could fit eight people, so would four rooms be

enough? I built one room, connected it to the hallway, and built the second.

My consciousness began to fade from using up too much MP.

I began to stumble back to my tent in a daze when I heard the Class

Rep's voice.

"Haruka-kun, wait a second! Everyone, please keep your clothes on

—"

My female classmates must have formed a barbarian clan of nudists,

I thought. So much for being dignified, mature teen girls—they'd gone

totally feral. And the Class Rep was acting like their mother, trying to

civilize her unruly children.

"Okay, you can come out now. Dinner is ready!"

Yep, she's the spitting image of a mom.

I had fish for dinner again, but all the girls had an enthusiastic

mushroom party. Something about that sounds inappropriate.

"What were you doing in there, Haruka-kun?" Class Rep asked, a

note of suspicion in her voice.

"Oh, uh, expanding my house? Construction? Excavation? New

rooms?"

"Yeah, of course. You need a room you can call your own. Sorry for

really taking over your place."

"Oh no, those rooms are for all for you," I said. "I couldn't make

everyone a private room, but I managed eight rooms, and I figure you can

split them up. I mean, you must've felt so cooped up together this whole

time, right?"

The moment I said that, the girls immediately rushed to check out

their rooms, with the class mom staying behind to scold them.

"Wait, are you going to sleep outside again?" the Class Rep asked. "If

you made all those rooms, why don't you sleep here?"

"No way! I can't. Everyone was totally naked like five minutes ago

and I'm a guy! Those lecherous creeps tried to attack you before, right?

Everyone feels safe right now, and I don't want to make anyone

uncomfortable or anxious."

"Thank you, I genuinely appreciate it. We really don't want to

inconvenience you." The Class Rep thought for a moment. "Hmm, I don't

think anyone would mind if it was just you?"

"N-no way!"

Even that brief glimpse of the girls in a state of undress was way

more than I could handle. The delinquent guys didn't actually catch them,

but there was no way they would be comfortable around me so soon after

that.

"All right, I'm gonna head out," I said. "Thank you for the meal!"

I set up my tent outside. Remembering the awkwardness this

morning, I made it larger than it was yesterday.

If I haven't leveled up by now, I'm going to be seriously pissed, I

thought as I pulled up my status.

NAME: Haruka

RACE: Human

LV: 07

JOB: —

HP: 93

MP: 92

VIT: 91

POW: 89

SPE: 87

DEX: 87

RES: 96

INT: 99

LUK: Max (Above Limit)

SP: 97

COMBAT SKILLS: Cane Mastery Lv6, Evasion Lv4, Foresight

Lv3, Magic Infusion Lv4

MAGIC: Heat Lv4, Movement Lv6, Weight Lv4, Packing Lv5, Four

Elements Lv4, Wood Lv2, Lightning Lv1

SKILLS: General Health Lv2, Sensitivity Lv3, Calisthenics Lv4,

Walking Lv6, Servitude Lv3, Appraisal Lv4, Clairvoyance Lv3, Presence

Detection Lv4, Enemy Tracking Lv4, Magic Manipulation Lv5, Presence

Concealment Lv3, Stealth Lv3, Hiding Lv2, Map Lv3, Focus Lv4, Physics

Resistance Lv2, MP Regeneration Lv3, Stamina Regeneration Lv2,

Parallel Thinking Lv1

TITLES: Shut-In L4, NEET Lv3, Loner Lv4, Sorcerer Lv4

ABILITIES: Corporate Proactiveness Lv2, Master of None Lv3,

Blockhead Lv2

EQUIPMENT: Wooden Stick?, Clothes Set?, Leather Glove?,

Leather Boots?, Cloak?, Contact Lenses?, Ring of the Destitute, Bag of

Holding, Monster Bracelet Power +1% Speed +1%

Hell yeah, I jumped up two levels in one day; my stats are about to

hit triple digits, I thought. I didn't feel any different while fighting the

goblins today, but apparently I had leveled up after all. It sucks that I've

been in the forest for ten days, killing literally hundreds of monsters

nonstop, and I've barely reached level 7. The Class Rep had focused on

helping the weakest members of her group level up, and even they were

levels 16-21. Somehow, they left me in the dust.

If this kept up, I'd end up as the one holding everyone back. At least

by that point all the girls should be strong enough to make it to town by

themselves. These raucous days would soon be over.

"Haruka-kun, can we come in?"

Speaking of raucous. Even though I'd expanded my tent to a size that

would easily hold four people, it was still cramped when a deluge of high

school girls flooded in. Welcome guests, all six of you.

"Um, sure, what's up?"

The six girls were the Class Rep, Vice Rep A, Vice Rep B, Queen

Bee, the Fish Girl who woke me up this morning, and—oh no—the first girl

to get naked! The worst possible girl to enter a guy's tent!

"Well, we just came to thank you—well, not just that, we also came

to apologize, and…" started Class Rep.

"First, I want to tell you something," said the exhibitionist girl. "I

have to admit, I was kind of testing you earlier and I'm sorry about that.

Chika wants to tell you something, too."

What's Chika?

Fish Girl spoke, "Oh, um, listen. This morning, I came to apologize

to you. I felt responsible for kicking you out of your own home. But when I

tried to say sorry, you got so excited about fish that you knocked me over."

"Oh, Chika is Fish Girl!" I exclaimed. "I thought 'chika' was some

kind of bird call you all were practicing. You're not part of a birdwatching

club?"

Five of them erupted in a chorus of shouts. "What the hell do you

mean by Fish Girl?! Do you think Chika-chan's parents are fishermen or

something?! Why do you insist on giving us weird nicknames?! Chika is a

name, idiot! Where did you pull birdwatching from?!"

My classmates' comebacks are always critical hits. Is that a cheat

skill, too?

"Well, she was the one who brought me fish, right? Besides, for all

you know, there might be something fishy about her parents!"

"That's not how names work! There's nothing fishy about her

family…probably! Besides, how could you shove a girl like that?!"

The Class Rep explained that Fish Girl—wait, not Fish Girl, her

name was some sort of birdcall I think—was pretty shook up after getting

attacked by the delinquents. The other girls were being protective of Fish

Girl's feelings, which is why they'd seemed so unhappy about my presence.

So she'd come into my tent that morning to apologize for making me feel

unwelcome in my own home.

The Class Rep always explained things in a way I understood through

all this cacophony. Thank you for doing so much; thank you for being the

class's representative, mother-figure, and interpreter.

"Got it. I'm sure things were rough for you, Fish Girl, so don't worry

about it. Plus, I got fish." Grilled fish, no less! I could never hold a grudge

after that.

"How did she become Fish Girl?!" cried the other girls. "You really

can't remember anyone's name for a second!"

Wait, her name isn't Fish Girl? I thought we just finished talking

about how her parents were fishy, hence Fish Girl.

I glanced at the Class Rep. "So, why was Nudist Girl also

apologizing?"

"Who the heck is Nudist Girl? Where do you get off giving a girl a

name like that?!"

"But she was naked!" I protested, gesturing at the exhibitionist.

"Fukunuki-san, were you naked?!"

"N-no, not exactly! I mean, it wasn't a big deal! I was just getting

undressed on my way to the bath and he saw me! Just a glimpse! Nothing

more than that!"

Everyone sighed.

"I just overheard you guys talking about how the fish was ready and

looked over at the wrong moment," I said. "The mean girls and the nudist

clan are downright terrifying."

"Leave the mean girls out of this! They're not relevant here. One

more thing, they're not mean girls!"

"The mean—er, I mean Shimazaki-san was just trying to protect you,

Haruka-kun. Don't you dare be mean to them!" Vice Rep B scolded me,

shaking her head in disappointment. Other features of her body also shook

when she did that. No, I'm not staring! Please don't glare at me, Class Rep!

My eyes just wandered past! They didn't linger!

"Did you just almost call them—never mind," Vice Rep A said, then

cut herself off. She addressed the Queen Bee, "You were going to say

something in his defense?"

They were all glaring at me. I deny all accusations!

"Like, even though you totally enthralled us, you didn't take

advantage of the situation to do anything gross or anything like that. In fact,

you just left us alone. You showed so little interest that you didn't even

bother to remember our names. So, I don't think you'll cause any problems.

Um, like, wait a minute! What about the name thing? That's totally a

problem, right?"

So much for defending me! The more they talked, the worse they

made me sound. Now the girls were glaring at me again! I couldn't handle

it.