Chapter 2- The agreement

"Kara can't get pregnant, Faye. It's something to do with the womb lining not being suitable," As Steve was explaining this I could see Kara moving her knees and cringing like she felt disgusted with herself.

"Oh, Kara I'm so sorry," I reached out and took her hand in mine but when I saw how down she looked I just had to hug her. I could feel her trying to stifle her sobs and she did manage to keep her composure. "What will you do now?" I asked as I sat back down.

"Well, we went to an adoption agency in town. They sent a person out to our house last week to talk to us and to look around to assess if we could be considered as foster parents," Steve told me in a matter of fact way, I could sense a degree of anger behind what he was saying. But, it seemed… forced, like he was trying to sound angrier than he was if that makes sense.

"We got a letter from them on Tuesday," Kara continued. "Apparently because of Steve's work schedule and my past mental health issues, we can't be considered as viable foster carers, even though I'm a teacher and look after kids all day!"

"Oh," I said, feeling uneasy about being told such personal details all of a sudden, even though they were telling me openly it still felt like prying. "What do you mean mental health issues?" I asked, deciding to pry anyway.

"I've suffered from depression for a long time and because I still take anti-depressants… they don't believe that I'd cope with being the primary carer while Steve is away," she said grimacing.

I should explain that Steve's job requires him to spend about two weeks a month in New York, and now that Kara had told me about the depression, I briefly wondered if his absence was contributing to it and maybe that's why she wanted the baby. But I didn't have time to fully explore that yet.

"So, what are you going to do? I mean, can you go to a different adoption place?"

"No," Kara said shaking her head grimly. "No one will see past the fact that Steve works away a lot or that I'm on medication, they basically told us that we shouldn't have children together."

"Wow, that's… that's terrible for you, I'm so sorry," I said in a comforting way as possible.

I'll be honest, at this point I was kinda on the side of the adoption people, I'm pretty sure they would've seen the same thing I did. A couple that spends a long time apart wanting something to keep them together, rather than a child to actually bring up together. Hell, if I could see it, they must've seen it too.

Right now it still hadn't dawned on me what they were going to ask me, or how I fit into this thing, all of which became clear when Steve spoke again.

"So it leaves us with one option, find a surrogate," Steve said it bluntly and drew another harsh look from his wife, but this time he continued on regardless. "Where we would go to a clinic and some of Kara's eggs would be fertilized with my sperm, and then placed in the womb of a surrogate mother who would then become pregnant with our baby."

Now, let's press the pause button here for a moment as I think this through.

It was now clear to me why they were here, what they wanted and how much they wanted it. And in this split second, I turned detective on this whole scenario. It's surprising how clarity is bestowed upon you when you're in such a situation as this.

Now, these two people, one of whom I've had a crush on for a couple of years were about to ask me to bear their child. Looking at Kara's face and realising how much she clearly wanted (or thought she wanted) this meant I already know I'd agree to anything for her. Agreeing to do this would certainly make us closer, but it would also push us further away after I'd given birth and she became addicted to baby clothes and all the shit that comes with it. Even if she didn't push me away after the birth, I'd be a mother, and that notion blew my mind and I really don't know how that would work.

So, I knew I'd agree because I wanted to make her smile, but I also knew I'd have to get out of it somehow in a way which made me still look amazing to her but at the same time made damn sure my womb remained empty, but all of that was by and by because in this short time I'd realized something else.

That look on Steve's face when he'd entered my flat, the hushed words he'd shared with Kara and the head shaking. He did not want me to agree to this! The blunt way he'd described the whole process was clearly an attempt to put me off and that could only mean one thing, he didn't want a baby at all! So... why not?

It's obvious when you think about it, he spends two weeks at home with the beautiful Kara, then jets off across the Atlantic Ocean to New York where he spends another two weeks with the "'good old boys' probably visiting lap dancing clubs while Kara is home popping anti-depressants like sweeties because she's lonely.

Now Kara wants a baby for the company, and he's clearly hoping it never happens. He must've thanked God when they went to the doctor, and when they got that letter from the adoption agency. I wonder if he'd emphasized the negatives of having a child to them?

Obviously, I could say no, but if I did Kara would be crushed, and then, even worse, they might find someone else that would say yes and then Kara would be enamoured with them instead of me… So, you can see the depth of bowel gravy I was currently swimming against.

However, in this split second I'm currently describing to you, a devious part of my mind, occupied by the lesser spotted 'bad girl' was formulating a plan. A way to solve this whole situation… and I'm not going to tell you my plan in case it doesn't work out the way I hoped it would. I'm not stupid. If it goes tits up I'll style it out.

Armed with my master plan, let's press play again.

"Are you asking me to be a surrogate for you?" I asked Kara.

"Yes, Faye, we are asking you to please consider doing this for us…" She looked at me pleadingly, but even her emotion didn't feel genuine now. I was starting to wonder if either of them thought this was truly a good idea!

"But," Steve interrupted. "It's perfectly okay and understandable if you say no, I know it's a lot to take in for you, you're only nineteen and you have your whole life ahead of you."

"We wouldn't expect anything from you," Kara talked over him this time. "We wouldn't dump the baby on you all the time or make you pay any money or anything like that."

"Wow," I faked surprise even though I'd figured most of this out ten seconds ago. "I don't know what to say, I…"

"It's okay to say no," Steve interrupted again. It would be nice to finish a sentence sometime soon!