webnovel

Illusion Is Reality: Gravity Falls

Gravity falls fan wakes up as Bill Cypher, gets OP, other shit. Disclaimer, I do not own Gravity Falls. This fic is inspired by things said by Alex Hirsch, many fanart and fanfics I’ve seen. There will be pop culture references, there will be song lyrics, there will be memes. You have been warned. I wanted to try something different, how well I succeed is up to debate... . . . . . . .

Mlzuum4 · TV
Sin suficientes valoraciones
181 Chs

-Know this, Cipher-

(Not really Christmas but whatever)

---

It was that time again. The festive season. The biggest holiday celebrated throughout the Multiverse.

Crimbo.

And while it was a wonderful holiday, created by a race of beings who's purpose was to spread love and joy to all living (and even some non-living) creatures (as well as a socially acceptable excuse to get outrageously drunk), it had changed through the eons, evolved with each celebration, altered it's core message and traditions until every sector had their own version, some with different names and even wholly separate lore for how and why this holiday was created. Despite this, there were a few things that remained the same.

The giving of Gifts to others.

But there was another core to this holiday that few knew about, not at first. They figured it out real quick once they experienced it for themselves. But after many complaints were sent in to the head office, filed under 'disturbing the peace' and 'unimaginable terror', the current council leader (though how long he would hold his position was in question, what with that councilwoman rising in the ranks with no sign of stopping) finally decreed for an official Public Service Announcement throughout the multiverse for the sake of warning everyone so that they would be safe this holiday season.

And due to the issues with different languages throughout the multiverse (sure, translators existed, but sometimes they didn't get the message across without being there in person to explain properly) he found, to his annoyance, that he would have to give his PSA in the only language that was universal.

Music.

So he stood there, in front of the camera and cleared his throat before singing his warning to the multiverse.

You better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I'm telling you why

Bill Cipher is coming to town

He's making a list,

Checking it twice,

Gonna find out who's naughty or nice.

Bill Cipher is coming to town

He sees you when you're sleeping

He knows when you're awake

He knows if you've been bad or good

So be good for goodness sake

You better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I'm telling you why

Bill Cipher is coming to town

With little black limbs and a little black hat

He'll pull you right in, you're not coming back

Bill Cipher is coming to town

He'll give out his gifts, even when we refuse

We simply can't stop this chaotic mad muse

Bill Cipher is comin' to town

He seeks out those with wicked hearts, to devour them whole

Frankly this is so much worse, than receiving coal

So! You better watch out, you better not cry

Better not pout, I'm telling you why

Bill Cipher is comin' to town

He sees you when you're sleeping

He knows when you're awake

He knows if you've been bad or good

So be good for goodness sake

Goodness sake

You better watch out

You better not cry

You better not pout

I'm telling you why

Bill Cipher is coming to town

He waited for the music to fade and then cut the feed. He could only hope that the citizens would heed this warning. Really, what was it about this holiday season that made Cipher even more energetic and active than usual? It made things so much harder on all of them, running interference, sending aid ships to the towns that had been rampaged through, hiring all the cleaners and construction workers to fix the damage...

...hiring the curse-breakers to check over anything Cipher left behind at the places he visited to make sure they were safe...

Really, it took so much money out of the budget! The councilman sighed. And that meant he couldn't embezzle that money for himself to take a vacation to Rinh-2 for the holiday! Worse, Cipher specifically tracked down people who embezzled money and took them away... where they wouldn't be returned until after the holidays were over. It was horrifying. He remembered seeing one of the other councilmen get snatched up into a sack and slung over the demon's shoulder. Even after he was returned to them... he was never the same.

The councilman shuddered. So he couldn't even try to sneak a little money away from the stores for his own use. It was so incredibly unfair!

---