Chapter 19: Love

If I told him that he hurts me, what will he do? What does he do when his girls cry? Does he asks them like how he asks me?

"I didn't," I defended. I tore my eyes off of him. He didn't spoke for a while.

All I ever felt next was his finger on my chin, as if forcing me to look at him. Unlike a while ago, his eyes now changed from unreadable to something extraordinary. I can't tell what it's telling but it sent shivers down my spine. I refused to name it now.

He tucked the strands of my hair at the back of my ear. "I'm sorry for what happened. I didn't expect to have that reaction from you."

"I didn't expect to have that reaction from you, too."

"Look. It's not what you think it is. I laughed because I didn't expect you to be like one of the hopeless romantic girls who writes poems about love." He explained.

So he never thought that I was a girl who indulges herself in fairytales and romance, huh? Well, when we had our first encounters, I treated him boldly. Like I was a non-softspoken girl who happens to talk back whenever I want.

All I thought he was laughing because my works for him were ugly. I kinda felt relieved but...

"Nevertheless, you still laughed at me." I said bitterly.

I stopped searching for movies because I was too preoccupied with our conversation that the titles I read was not being processed by my brain.

I saw him lower his head, like regretting something. "I'm sorry,"

It's like the magic word that made me turn my head to him. I know gor myself that even though he didn't apologized, I will still forgive him.

"It's okay. I'm already used to it," I shrugged.

"No. I mean... for all I have done," his voice became small when he said that. Like a little kitten who's begging for it's master.

I almost chuckled at that thought but I stopped myself.

I just smiled and nodded. That's more than enough for me. More than enough from what I asked for.

"13.8 billion years ago, the Big Bang created the stars, the planets, and the galaxies. Compared to the lifespan of the universe, our lives begin and end in a single day."

We were both quiet when The Sun Is Also A Star started playing. It was originally a novel and I already have read it. Now, I wanna watch it, even though I already knew the plot.

Truth is, compared when I was reading it, I am just entertained. Now, I am watching it because the title itself interests me. The heavenly bodies, the galaxies, were mentioned.

"So you're a big fan of true love, huh?" He was in the other side of the couch.

I turned my head to him while I was hugging my knees. He was just staring straight at the television, though.

"True love exists," I said, not tearing my eyes on him.

He scoffed. "Then you refuse to believe in the notion that 'nothing's permanent' for it." He then turned to me and our eyes met.

A guy like him is capable of talking deep like that, huh? Although it's kind of ridiculous but I still find that thought amazing.

"What do you mean?"

"You see, change is inevitable. Everything in this world changes. Even love." He said.

"Because if true love does exist, why do other people rend to cheat? Falls out of love? Why are there some relationship that ends up torn apart?" he added. I winced on how bitter he sounded.

I paughed and returned my eyes on the movie. I now can't understand it because I was busy with my conversation with Lucas.

"Love isn't permanent for people who refuses to believe in it... Like you." I said.

I pooked at him when I felt his stare. I then saw amazement in his eyes. Maybe because he is a playboy and he is used to playing games like that. And his actions justify his words. Nothing's permanent sa kaniya dahil buwan buwan, papalit palit siya ng babae.

"If you believe in something, you'd pursue it. If you choose not to believe, nothing will happen."

"Alright then. Then tell me why people cheat? How can they stomach to throw and treat their love ones like trash? Why does break up exist? Betrayal?" he argued as he gave those examples.

"Cheating is a choice. Leaving is a choice. But staying is a choice too. People who believe in love will always find a way to make things work. They will rather deal with their battles than escape from it." I didn't heard his response after I said that.

I just saw him smirk. Or more like a smile. I don't know if he finds my statement funny or he's amused by it. I can't name it. He's too hard to read.

"What if they fall out, then?" he didn't gave up on his debate.

"Staying in love is a choice. People only fall for the idea of 'falling out of love'. If they fall out, then it is never really love. Because love never fades, it overcomes death, and admits no flaw," I said irritatedly.

"Like I said, If you love, you'd pursue it. You'd secure it, you'll trust, and have faith. Because love endures all things and hopes all things."

"That's too ideal, Miss Chavez."

"We always dream of the ideals..." I shrugged and stood up.

I just decided to study now since it's useless to watch a movie. I couldn't understand a thing.

He remained deated while watching me. I raised my brow at him.

"I won't tell anyone," he said before imitating me.

Won't tell anyone what? He won't tell anyone how hopeless romantic I am? So what if the whole world knows it? They can't deny that love is real.

"Huh?"

He smiled devilishly. "Your poems," he said and left me in that room, dumbfounded.

I saw my brother Joaguin and Jerich there. I also noticed the now orange sky from our glass walls and that's when I realized that it's sunset.

Wait. How many hours did me and Lucas stayed inside? I didn't even noticed the sky from the room's walls!

But then again, I blushed at his comment. I started to wonder how many and what has he read insude my journal. It's a good thing, though, that I didn't left traces of his name in there.

I was about to lash out on him when I stopped myself because my brothers were watching.

They will only conclude malicious things and they won't stop bugging me if so.

"Joaquin, Jerich," Lucas acknowledged there presence.

I looked at him with my wtf-look.

"Oh, so you're skipping formalities now, huh?" I said.

He smirked at me while I heard my brothers laugh at the background.

"It's fine, Jiana. After all, we're kinda noticing that you two are close," Jerich gave me a malicious smile.

I rolled my eyes and groaned. I knew that they were already concluding!