I AM THE AUTHOR

CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE

"Oh, but there's one thing to do before we head off. There's an hour until the carriage gets here, so…." I said, stretching out my arms and legs. what is it? Bog asked, and I waved him off. "I just need to get my blackmailing supplies ready. But that's not the point. Where were you yesterday? I could have used some divine intervention or help when coming up with that fallen knight thing." I said, and Bog sighed. Your divine power is not in your control right now - so, instead of summoning me, it just bounces around inside of you until it gets the right combination to summon me, and then the right combination to cut me off, so I'll just randomly be summoned and sent away until you have better control. he lectured, and I sighed. Oh yeah. I had the power, but not the control. One of the reasons I wish Cordelia the 1st was here right now. 

But, Cordelia the 2nd, why did you wake up so early? divine beings need sleep too. Bog complained, and I rolled my eyes. "I told you, I need to get my blackmailing supplies ready. That is, sneak into the information guild and steal all their dirt on Zal's family so that I can blackmail them." Bog blinked. But blackmailing? Isn't that low for a priestess? Bog asked, and I held a finger in the air. "That's why I'm doing this before I'm a priestess. Also, no, because the only reason I can find dirt is because they did bad things. So it's karma." I defended, persistent, and Bog sighed. alright. How can I help? "Oh, you can watch, and, if necessary, make a distraction on the other side of the building," I said, and Bog nodded. alright. Good luck, darling. "Thanks. I'll need it." I sighed. 

Now, let's tell you why I'm here. As I already narrated, Zal played a big part in the destruction of the empire. Not that he was a villain, but more that he had no idea all this was happening under his nose. And since I was one of the people who died because of this godforsaken tragic plot, I need to stop the Ruthim empire before it's too late. And for that, I need to do what Zal couldn't do - use the power of his family to stop all this. But there is no way they're giving their power to a random commoner, which is why I concluded that I should just blackmail them into it. 

So Im stealing all the dirt that this information guild has on them. 

And in the best way possible, too: through the window! I checked them all to see whether they were open or not, but none were, aside from the ones who had guards literally right next to them. So I guess there was no other option. Time to do something priestly that would probably make the cardinal faint if he saw it. I channeled my raw divine power as sloppily as I could on purpose so that it exploded and lit up my entire arm. And now that It was blindingly bright, I lept in through the window and promptly blinded the poor guard. as he jumped back, I used Cordelia's ant body and cheetah stamina to wriggle free from the guard's grasp and dash down the hallway. "THE DISTRACTION! BOG! NOW!" I yelled. It takes quite a human to boss me around. Bog groused, but a minute later I heard a roof collapse in the distance. Viola. "Thanks, Bog! I owe you one!" I said as the guards took off running. My arm was flashing like a strobe light. As I used the doorknob, in my haste, I imagined pouring a gallon of water over the doorknob. As sparks flew off, the doorknob melted off, and I kicked the door open. Here we were. the records room. 

It was a large room, full of paper and more paper. Luckily, all I had to do was corner the seal of Zal's house, and, thanks to the carriage incident, I had it covered. I grabbed a sack from the hanger and….

stared in horror at the seals of 250 different noble houses. "Hey, bog..? I might need a few more distractions." I muttered. what?! How are you going to go through that? Bog asked, and I sighed. No time to waste. Better to get to work than - OH. WORK. 

Thats it! there was no way some poor minimum-wage dude went through all of this junk to find just a single piece of paper. There had to be a key somewhere. And, there it was - right there on the wall. "Okay, lets see… House Eur… House Eur…" I said, running my finger down the wall. Come on! Come on! 

"Row 8! Hurry, me!" I said, scrambling to dash over to the 8th shelf. It was an entire drawer - but I suppose that was why I brought a sack. I dumped the entire thing into the sack, tied it, opened the window, and hopped out. A job well done. 

good job, darling. Looks like I choose the right Apostle. You're certainly in a different league than Cordelia 1st. Bog mused, but I was too busy dashing down the street. This was a second chance I wasn't passing up - I was going to yeet this tragic storyline out the window.