Love & Lies

Heaven was the place Kat and I called our small haven's nest. It is consist of one big cottage like home and several mini cottages for guests and visitors far more foreigners who want to explore Maldives and its beauty.

I bought another house in California and Sun City where Kat's family lives. I also met them and they are a beautiful family. I was very lucky to have met Kat that I now value the need for family and the love for one, that wasn't quite usual for me and my past.

I wanted a farm but Kat needed to reside in the city with its sky scrapers because her agency lives and breathes in ads and publicity for It to continue to strive in the hundreds of competitors Kat competes with in the industry of fashion and ads agency. The difference with her work is she takes the challenge head on and doesn't back down, a woman who is always on the go and for the kill when she does her job especially for her company, her team and her future. Kat loves me I know, that even in our wedding preparations she is still the one arranging the flowers, receptions and anything that needed to done in time, she has the hand to fix everything and make them right.

However, my band and I continued our tour until we reached farther on the east but decided to go back to the U.S. for the last few months of the hustling world of world touring. Terry would always complain that his back ached a lot from sleeping in the tour bus, and not getting enough sun or air. Haha!, he has always been the complainer in the team. Anyway, I made sure that we stop at a motel or hotel to get proper showers, rest and food to eat. We can't live on a tour bus for months without stopping some motel or hotel to unwind on their bars or restos. I missed Kat so much and it's been two months since I last saw her. I'm beginning to feel that anxiety coming back and I began drinking which started when I was a teen-ager why I tried to commit suicide because of it.

Yet, thinking of Kat and our future, I seldom stop and fix myself together but when girls and booze start to flood in the concert hall grounds and after parties, I et carried away and sleep with numerous girls which I and my band often do when we're on tour. And no one of nothing can help it because we are sad, longing and wanting affection, sex and a little bit of fun from the painstaking hell of touring since we can't sleep much because of the jet lag or being pissed for not having enough good sleep since it's hard getting used to different time zones when we travel country after country, which I always hated when we're touring.

But this is my life and my band's bread and butter. We are used to this kind of set up but I guess however one is used to doing something, you still can't get familiar with time differences and people who we meet that aren't really that caring what will happen to us or if we had plenty of rest or ate well. People who are genuinely concern of our welfare but our fame and money. Only Kat is the person I know who truly loves and care for me, so I finally realized that I needed to stop drinking and womanizing, and start a new habit, that is be faithful to Kat and get help on my drinking issues.

Kat called me several times and my phone rang but I couldn't hear it since I was too drunk last night with some of my band members still struggling to wake up along with their so called dates from the bar we went to that is just near the hotel we checked in a couple of nights ago. Our concert is just a couple of blocks away for this place and it's most convenient to hold our rehearsals in their big halls here than in the concert grounds at the trade centre where we're going to have our show tonight at eight. Kat must be worried but it's already midnight there and she' already asleep. Poor baby, I told myself and texted her that I'm okay and just had to attend a party after the concert. I never thought my girl would reply back, saying, okay, babe, I'm glad to hear that, goodnight and I love you.

I love you, was what I sent as my message but it went directly to her voicemail. I wasn't worried because she is tired from work I'm sure and I bet she's already resting now. I need to straighten up and start with a clean slate this time. I want to be a good fiancée for Kat and I am going to be the best partner for her always. I pulled myself out of the girls I was with who I didn't exactly remember what I did with them but my body felt so sore I couldn't move my muscles freely. What did we do earlier, I kept asking myself, which my mind is struggling to remember but couldn't. Anyhow, I need to shower and sleep in my room. Hey guys, I'll go to my unit and night every one.

My band mates just moaned and groaned as a reply. But at Kat's place where she was lying in her bed, she saw everything that went down the bar and the hotel room where Alex and her band mates got drunk, wasted and brought the girls they dated that night. She even saw Alex and the three hot babes she was with because a client of hers attended The Moonies concert the night after it. It's just an accident that her client friend took a shot where Alex was kissing these girls knowing that she' s already engaged to me, haaaa!, I'll kill you Alex, you wait and see. But it's no use she'll be in tour for the rest of the month and there's no way I can do that to her since I love her, Kat told herself while her mind is speaking to her to dump that loser, sleazebag, traitor, womanizer, ass*….ahhhhhhh!, I can't take this anymore!, was what I can only tell myself right now. I shut my phone off and accidentally threw it away from me because of anger, hate ad jealousy, and because I was so hurt, crying and stressed at the moment. But when I realized that Alex will be calling me there, I searched for it and when I found my phone under the chair I always sit on when I read my books, I breathed heavily and my heart felt like it has been stabbed by a hundred knife and it hurts so bad, I am hurting so much what I can only do is cry out load and scream because I felt betrayed and lost. Yet, after seeing Alex having fun and as if she didn't mind getting caught that night, then maybe our relationship or engagement isn't that important to her.

Maybe we should call off the wedding and all?. The wedding preparations already begun and our friends have already been advised about it even our families. What will they say or what will our friends and clients say about the sudden….ahhhh!, I don't want to think about this, my head and my heart are tired thinking and feeling about what can happen and what should happen after I saw that bitch play and scorn me. I need to be smart and decide when I'm sober and in my sound mind. I need to talk about this with her and get things straight from her if we need to postpone the wedding or separate.

I will talk to her when she comes back from the tour and we will see, Kat told herself and tried to sleep since it's already three in the morning and she still need to wake up for their early morning shoot later. Tali is not going to be happy about me being late since I took her paperwork with me to check it out for tomorrow's shoot.

It's been days since Kat called me and now I can't even call her. What happened?, I asked myself while my band is having our rehearsals for our last night in Virginia. I can't wait to see my baby. Hey, Alex do you have a minute?, Manager Kim called me. Why Sam, we're almost done, what's up?

Have you seen these videos, you have been rumoured with these girls you dated that night at the bar!, It's all over the internet, and have you talked with Kat about it?, Sam asked a bit worried. Oh, no!, it's been days since I talked to her, she must've..aahaaahhhh, no, no. no!, B*ll s*hit paparazzi, I added now scared that Kat has seen these and I'm totally dead as we speak. I tried to call Kat but her phone is always diverted to the voicemail.