16

Stormlands, Dornish Marches, Black Haven.

"Lord Donddarion, Thank you for having us," I said as we dismounted off our horses.

He grinned, "Of course, Lord Sta- What the?"

My aunt, Allyria Dayne, skipped any courtesies and just ran my way, "Oh you look a lot like them," She cooed as she kept inspecting and stretching my face, "Ashara's eyes and Arthur's shoulders."

I smiled nervously at her as she continued her coddling, I wasn't used to this. My relationship with the only family I was familiar with was with uncle Benjen and Jon. It was more like poker buddies than family. We generally gave each other space and had fun, no incessant coddling and protectiveness.

She wiped her eyes furiously and sniffed, "I'm sorry my lord, Welcome to Black Haven."

I smiled at her, "Please call me Brandon, Lady Donddarion."

Unfortunately that caused her tears to flow more freely, "Call me Aunt Allyria, dearie."

"Of course," I said tightly as she patted my cheek.

Her husband grinned in the background and suggested, "Perhaps we should let our guests rest first?"

"Oh- Of course, a servant will show you your quarters," She said as she composed herself.

"Thank you," I replied.

As we followed the servant assigned to us Jon whispered, "Well, That was better than I expected."

"Quite the lovely lady isn't she?" I said in reply, "Clean up and make sure to check on the wolves before we go to eat."

By now, every castle in the Seven Kingdoms knew that the Stark Lord travelled with horse-sized Direwolves and apart from slight widening of eyes at their size at first, no comments were made, Severus was always snoozing inside my clothes. A couple of charms took care of any irritation or discomfort.

The guest rooms were nice enough, not as impressive as the ones back at Winterfell but I couldn't expect the standards at the North in the barbaric and undeveloped south.

By now, every city, village and town in the North had proper aqueducts, bath houses, straight concrete roads guarded by elite forces and a decent- for this world- sewer system. Wintercity was heralded as the greatest city in Westeros.

No place smelled of shit anywhere in the North. If you disposed your garbage and shit in a non-designated spot, you had to clean it yourself and serve for 50 hours in the sewers as well as pay a fine.

Needless to say, my toilets were a big hit.

Here in Blackhaven however, there wasn't much.

The number of smallfolk was acceptable, the castle wasn't that big and the area it controlled wasn't productive or allowed farming at all and mostly depended on fishing for food.

I really wanted to do something nice for my aunt and so I extended my senses to get a general idea about the area.

The marshes were remarkably alkaline and only needed slight modification of soil conditions to allow rice growth which was done in a few minutes, a few blueprints of irrigation techniques and pulling up a mine in the southeast of the lands and I was ready to go.

The food was surprisingly, fish, and while it was of a good quality, it lacked variety. I took a moment from eating and started, "I noticed that you don't depend on farming much, Lord Donddarion."

"Indeed," he nodded, "The lands are too muddy and no crop can be grown in most of them. Most of our food is generated from fishing."

"I was hoping to help you with that, actually." I said.

He looked at me with a raised eyebrow and put down his fork, "How exactly would you do that? The only way is to clear the marshes, and I don't think even the Lord Paramount of the North can do that."

Actually I could, but he didn't need to know that. "You may be familiar with House Reed and Moat Cailin in the North," I said

I waited him for him to nod and said, "They're both one of the main suppliers for rice in the North."

"I've never heard of this rice," he said now clearly interested.

"It's because no one south the neck has been really interested in it before and most of it is stored for winter," I replied

"And this… rice, it can be grown in large quantities?"

I nodded, "Yes, they make the land muddy by flooding to grow them outside the marshes in the North and in the far east. If you manage to store the grain in a dry place, it'll last forever."

He looked contemplative, "It's an intriguing proposal but what would you benefit from providing a Northern crop to me?"

I smiled at my Aunt, "I would get to help my Aunt and make her new castle better for her and any little cousins I have in the future." I added, "That and you could promote the new crop down here in the south."

He laughed, "That's more like it, I assume you're going to provide us with the seeds and grains for planting it?"

"Of course," I nodded, "Men from House Stark and the Marshes will arrive here as soon as possible with grains and teach your smallfolk how to plant them appropriately as well as mapping the area."

If the mappers managed to find the Silver vein that I pulled out as well, that was purely coincidental of course, as well as the miners that just happened to be traveling with them.

Centuries have made a bit of softie.

My aunt kept gushing about how sweet and helpful her nephew was and I just smiled at her politely. This was getting out of hand. Each time she smiled at me genuinely and the amount of love she showered at me was a tad irritating and I could feel my dark soul twisting and clenching every time she did.

"We have an agreement then my lord," He said with a laugh, "How about we celebrate with a drink?"

"Northern drinks I hope?" I grinned

An even wider grin broke out on his face, "Of course."

The next day,

After a vicious night of drinking that ended with Jon and Ramsay drooling on each other, me fully sober and Beric- as he asked me to call him almost getting poisoned from the amount of alcohol he consumed we were on our horses to hunt.

Joy.

I don't know what these medieval cunts found so amusing about riding out in the dirt to capture animals and I didn't want to find out.

If we wanted a boar, a stag or even a bloody elephant, we would ask the hunters to find us one and within the day we would have it on our table. Sometimes we sent our wolf hunting parties to get it.

Almost fifty direwolves were fully grown in the new kennels by now and they couldn't just leave them scooped all day. Therefore, hunters and direwolves trainers would go out on hunting trips to bring back food and stretch their legs. The direwolves were also trained in running and fighting with a full suit of armor on them. Trust me, there was something beautiful about a charge of fully armored, horse-sized wolves just waiting to tear through infantry and cavalry alike.

We were already in the process of training riders for the direwolves, but so far they preferred working independently, only 5 or 6 bonded with their riders.

The mammoths were also proving to be fearsome but the huge acromantulas proved to be a bit too much for our soldiers. I would have to pick a few soldiers back at Winterfell and plant memories and a bit of magic in them to allow them to take over and control the huge arachnids.

Now someone may be worried that I'm practically handing out magic left and right but that wasn't exactly the case. I had a monstrously huge core and only handed out branches that could be cut at any moment to my chosen ones. Each time any of them cast the minor spells that I taught them it would tap into my own magical core.

Back to our ridiculous hunt, we had to make our way into the filthy swamps avoiding poisonous plants and enduring mosquitos all the way. Beric Dondarrion was a great knight and fighter but absolute shit at hunting.

His breathing was loud and footsteps spooked animals away. We've been at it for almost five hours now and he managed to scare off 5 stags and a small army of boars that almost gutted us.

I noticed that he managed to track the stag we were following for the last half an hour and motioning to us to follow.

30 meters- 20 meters – 10 meters now and- SNAP

The idiot managed to step on a branch and break it. The stag looked up from the grass and spotted us, but I seriously had enough.

"Nagini, Kill." I almost hissed in anger.

Nagini looked up and broke out in a run, flowing like liquid over rocks and between trees and jumping over the stag killing it in one swipe of its claws.

Our entire party was silent, looking at me with amazement. I looked at them, "Is anyone going to carry the stag or do I have to do everything myself?"

That broke them out of their stupor and each shuffled to their tasks.

Beric whined, "I almost got it."

I looked at him with a cold gaze that caused him to flinch, "Where are you going next, Lord Stark."

"Storm's end castle, to meet lord Renly hopefully," I replied.

He broke out laughing and clarified at my befuddled look, "I don't think our liege lord has stayed in Storm's end ever since his grace took the throne."

"Where can we find him then?" Jon asked.

"Most likely at King's Landing; He's the Master of Laws on the small council."

"We'll just have to skip Storm's End I guess," I said.

He nodded, "The king is hosting a tourney in a few weeks for the crown prince name-day, and you can accompany our party there."

"You're participating?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

He grinned, "Nothing can keep me from the glory and excitement of tourneys, and the king's tourneys are the best."

I shrugged, "Very well."

We remained in Blackhaven for almost a week after the hunt and from there another week to arrive in King's Landing.

The seat of the monarch and ruler of the Seven Kingdoms was disgusting and the smell of shit could be smelled a couple miles away from the gates. Needless to say, I wasn't impressed.

Poorer smallfolk build shanty settlements outside the city. While the city is roughly square-shaped, sprawling across several miles and defended by tall walls. Our party was allowed quickly through the Iron Gate into the city.

Inside, the city was dotted with manses, arbors, granaries, brick storehouses, timbered inns, merchant stalls, taverns, graveyards and brothels. It was a complete chaos! The sewer system that was built at the founding of the city has collapsed and no one bothered to change it. There were no clear districts! Everything was so jumbled.

Smoke, sweat, and shit. King's Landing, in short.

The city held almost 500,000 at summer time which was way too much than it can properly sustain. Yes, Wintercity had around 1 million citizens but most of them had jobs outside the city in the surrounding lands and it was much much cleaner.

I doubted that anyone bothered to map the city and record any of the buildings and shops here.

In the south-eastern corner of the city lied the Red Keep, the royal castle, made of pale red stone with seven drum-towers crowned with iron ramparts. Massive curtain walls surround the keep, with nests and crenelations for archers.

It had nothing on Winterfell. Our towers and walls were thrice as high and our castle was much cleaner and fearsome.

"Where do they host tourneys?" I asked Beric.

He replied, "Outside the city, just by the Blackwater."

"And where are we going to stay until the tourney?" I asked

He shrugged, "We'll find a decent inn."

A man in a white cloak with droopy eyes and red beard approached us

"My Lord Stark," he said bowing his head, "The king requests your and your party's presence in the Red Keep."

I nodded at him, "Lead the way Ser….?"

"Meryn Trant, my lord." He said turning around and guiding us with a contingent of gold cloaks.

We passed through a lot of corridors and hallways until we finally reached the great hall.

It was cavernous room that could hold almost a thousand nobles comfortably with tapestries of hunting adorning the walls. The Iron Throne sat on a raised dais with high and narrow steps.

The throne itself wasn't as I thought it would be. It is supposed to have taken a thousand blades to make, heated in the breath of Balerion the Black Dread.

Instead it was a small monstrosity of spikes and jagged edges that looked extremely uncomfortable and not as big as I thought it would be.

On it sat a fat man, red faced under his beard, sweating heavily while Jon Arryn stood proudly disregarding his old age and white hair.

On the other side of the throne on a smaller chair, a slender woman with golden hair and emerald green eyes sat imperiously looking over us with a blond copy of her sitting with a bored expression on his face.

The herald announced us, "Introducing Lord Brandon Stark, Lord of Winterfell, Lord Paramount of the North, Warden of the North and the Annihilator of Pyke."

Annihilator of Pyke? Was that a formal title?

I swallowed my pride and kneeled at the throne, "Your grace."

Robert just waved me off and laughed loudly, "Bran! I haven't seen you since the Greyjoy Rebellion."

"We've decided to take a break from ruling the North and visit the Seven Kingdoms, your grace."

His eyes get glassy, "Ahhh! Sometimes I wish I could do the same." He shook his head, "There is a tourney next week. You're here for it?"

I nodded and he boomed laughing, "Excellent. We'll have a feast tonight to welcome you properly in King's Landing."

"I'll be honored your grace." I said.

He nodded and stood up bellowing, "Baelish, Wine and Whores!"

Jon looked at Robert exasperatedly and shook his head in disappointment and approached us, "Welcome to King's Landing, Brandon."

"Thank you, Jon. Do you happen to know where I could find a manor to buy here? House Stark should have a place in King's Landing, right?"

"Of course, my page will send you a list of available manors in a few minutes," He smiled, "How's the North and Ned?"

"Both are doing well," I said with a grin, "I couldn't pull Uncle Ned from the North however."

"Ned always loved the North," he said sighing, "I doubt he'd have come to the Eyrie if it wasn't a direct order from his father."

I nodded without saying anything.

"Perhaps you would be interested to join us on the small council as an advisor during your stay? It's about time that the North had a representative on the small council don't you say?"

I took a peek into his mind and found out his reason. He thought if he could placate me with a position on the Small Council in the future he'd keep me under his gaze in King's Landing instead of strengthening the North even more.

I was too intrigued however to find out how the Small Council worked here in the Capital so I nodded, "Perhaps after the tourney?"

"Of course," He smiled kindly, "Ah! There's Pate, he'll guide you to the manors and help you settle in."

I nodded at the boy, "Thank you for all your help, Jon."

He waved me off, "It was nothing, my boy. Starks are practically family to us."

I smiled at him and excused myself.

We found a mansion soon enough. Gold persuaded anyone… and compulsions. We managed to get a grand mansion on top of a cliff on Rhaenys Hill surrounded by a small Moat. I sent a raven to Winterfell ordering 300 soldiers to arrive at King's Landing to protect the Mansion at all times. It would take almost 2 weeks for them to arrive but for now, I had to depend on bribed Gold Cloaks and the small amount of guards that accompanied Aunt Allyria and Lord Donddarion.

We settled quickly inside and after placing wards and anti-spying hexes and loyalty spells on every guard we were ready to roam King's Landing.

It was absolutely disgusting.

The area surrounding the Red Keep was obviously the 'cleanest' and was exclusive for nobles and wealthy merchants or knights. It was acceptable for a city, ignoring the fact that even then it looked like a rat-infested smelly dungeon.

Half the city looked like it was built sporadically and without any planning whatsoever. Narrowing streets, mismatched buildings and so many irregularities made the heart of the Seven Kingdoms look like a swamp.

Dirt mixed with shit and animal entrails were used as pavements instead of cobblestone, children were scattered all over the place begging for food, men looked so dirty as if they haven't had a shower their entire lives.

Utterly disgusting.

I could feel a big smile coming on my face; King's Landing was to be my new playground.

Small Coucnil Meeting.

I had to leave Jon and Ramsay alone to their own devices as it would be considered rude if I brought them without invitation into the Small council.

The chamber was richly furnished. Myrish carpets covered the floor instead of rushes, and in one corner a hundred fabulous beasts cavorted in bright paints on a carved screen from the Summer Isles. The walls were hung with tapestries from Norvos and Qohor and Lys, and a pair of Valyrian sphinxes flanked the door, eyes of polished garnet smoldering in black marble faces.

I noticed three figures standing around the table waiting for the Hand and the King to arrive.

A short plump bald man wearing robes that would've made Lucius faint approached me with a soft smile, "Lord Stark, It's an honor to finally meet you," he said.

I shook his sweaty hands with a grimace, "Thank you… ermm?"

"Varys, my lord, The Master of Whispers," he said serenely.

"A pleasure, Lord Varys," I said wiping my hand discreetly.

He tittered, "I'm no lord, just a simple man serving the realm."

"Not your realm though," At his confused look, I added, "You're originally from Essos, correct? Lys to be accurate."

He replied without hesitation, "I've lived in Westeros and King's Landing for so long; I consider it my home now."

I just smiled at him and moved on, "Lord Renly."

"Lord Stark," he nodded back with an easy going smile.

I moved to the only seated occupant of the table, "Lord Stannis, I hope you are well."

"As well as I can be, my lord," he said shortly.

We were interrupted from our rich conversation by three figures, "Petyr Baelish, Lord Arryn and Grandmaester Pycelle." Renly said.

I nodded at him and nodded to the new arrivals, "Ah! Lord Stark, Truly an honor to have you here," Pycelle said with enthusiasm.

"Thank you Grandmaester," I said with a smile, "It's an honor to be here as well."

Jon nodded at me and the last man to arrive smiled at me tightly and moved without a word.

"I hereby call this Small Council meeting to session," Jon Arryn said as he took a seat.

I raised an eyebrow, "Without the King?"

Grandmaester Pycelle said, "The King entrusts us with the matters of-" Jon interrupted, "Robert doesn't care about the Small Coucnil."

Pycelle flushed and I nodded without a word. This was perfect.

"How goes the preparations for the Tourney?" Jon asked.

"There has been a few incidents," Renly said briefly.

"Incidents?" Jon asked with an arched eyebrow.

Renly said with the same easy going grin, "4 fights between nobles that was solved quickly, 3 whores were killed and we have no idea who did it, a bakery was on fire yes that also and we found a tavern wench's head as well… we still can't find the body."

Jon's eyes gained a hard glint, "And where were the Gold Cloak's during all of this?"

Renly shrugged, "I have 2,000 men. King's Landing has half a million at any time. The influx of knights and nobles is just too much too handle."

Jon sighed heavily, "This tourney is completely unnecessary!"

Renly shrugged once more, "King's orders, my lord hand."

"I seem to recall that Wintercity and Winterfell have almost the same number of citizens inside its walls," Pycelle said with a cough turning at me, "Perhaps you can advise us on how to deal with this grievous matter my lord."

All eyes fell on me and I raised an eyebrow, "We have almost 6 thousand guards throughout the city. How can you expect here each guard to keep the peace and control two hundred and fifty persons?"

Jon looked at me," Still, even 80 people per guard are too much in the North. How do you deal with it?"

I waved him off, "Dealing with smallfolk and citizens isn't a hassle. Enacting strict punishments usually gets the job done. Nobles and Knights are a completely different matter. Perhaps we could contain them in a specific area in King's Landing and focus Gold Cloak's there?"

Jon frowned, "But that would mean that the taverns and bars and whorehouses outside this area would lose money. Lodgings and drinks are located all over the city, Lord Stark. Not in a specific area."

"It might have something to do with the shitty planning of the city." I muttered lowly and added, "In a later time we could relocate and focus taverns and bars in specific areas while the houses are in a completely different area. However, our priority now is keeping everyone safe, not a few coins lost during a tourney."

Everyone was nodding now, "That sounds appropriate but somewhat temporary as you said."

"Indeed," I said, "If Lord Renly's Gold Cloak's could provide us with accurate data or even an estimate of where most taverns are located we could start immediately."

Jon nodded slowly, "It'll definitely elect some grumpiness but overall that is the best choice."

Renly called Slynt and helped us draw a rough sketch and perimeter to where the nobles were going to be heavily concentrated at and that matter was done.

"How goes the treasury and finances, Lord Baelish?" Pycelle wheezed.

Baelish and the rest of the members looked at Pycelle with frowns and raised eyebrows.

"How goes… the treasury?" Baelish stumbled.

Pycelle nodded steadily ignoring all the curious stares sent at him.

Baelish recovered quickly and answered, "All the taxes have been paid and we're currently doing… okay."

Pycelle was clearly being my buddy in this council and he seemed to have a reason for asking that question. So intrigued, I sneered, "How extremely informative of you. Define okay, Lord Baelish.

Stannis smirked while Baelish stumbled, "All the realms have delivered their taxes appropriately and the various businesses in King's Landing have paid extra due to the money spent at the tourney."

I nodded, "And the treasury?"

"The treasury." He said confused.

"Excuse me for the misconception that the Master of Coins handles the treasury and finances of the realm. So please answer, in full sentences, the question."

Varys was openly smiling at the discomfort Baelish was demonstrating. He clearly didn't expect someone to nag him about the state of the treasury. I had already heard of him before I came here. An overall obnoxious man. It seemed that Robert was content with his ability to provide dragons whenever he wanted and didn't bother.

"The treasure is currently empty, my lord." He answered tightly.

"You emptied the entire treasury on this tourney?" I asked with a raised eyebrow

Varys added helpfully, "I think what Lord Baelish means is that the treasury has been empty for quite a while my lord."

"And how did you pay for the tourney?" I asked never taking my gaze of him.

"The Queen's family accommodated." He said.

"Ah, so you're in debt. You could've saved us a lot of time if you just said that from the beginning. How much?" I said sarcastically.

Jon seemed nervous and wanted to interject but a discreet compulsion made him reconsider.

"Almost Five million golden dragons; Two Million to the Lannisters, One and a half million to the Iron Bank, 1 million to house Tyrell and the rest to various merchants and the Faith."

I said amusedly, "You borrowed from the Faith."

He bristled, "The king orders and the Master of Coin finds the money."

"Yes, I suppose you do." I said with amusement clearly on my face, "May I see your plan for repaying the debt?"

"Plan?" He asked confused.

I rolled my eyes, "It seems you've lost control over your speech once more. Yes Baelish, I assume you have a fucking plan to clear the kingdom of its debt?"

He glared at me while the others were openly smiling or smirking in the case of Pycelle and Stannis while Jon seemed to not like how this was going, "There is no plan my lord."

"Long term projects that will pay off the debt? What generates a steady income- other than taxes that is in this bloody city?" He made to answer but I just waved him off, "Winter will come before we could probably get over with this so thank you for your contribution, Lord Baelish."

Silence ensued until Jon said with a high pitch, "Dismissed."

I got off my chair with my smile still on my face and walked out of the Small Council mentally reviewing all the information I pilfered off Baelish's brain while pushing him around.

A compulsion to stop him from acting to cover his tracks and I was set to go.

As soon as I was safely inside my room in the Manor I disillusioned myself and apparated to the hidden cellar that contained all of Baelish's money first. It was a lot of gold. Way too much, even for a smart investor. It was still not as much as I thought he would have from stealing off the crown though. He must have hid them or invested them somewhere else.

I cast a small compulsion on the door that made him reconsider transporting the money anytime he approached the door.

I planted some incriminating records as well and hit off to his office.

I didn't need to take a lot of time in doing that. The incriminating documents and records were at the front of his mind during my little interrogation. Normally, he wouldn't have stumbled in answering this much. But I had casted a befuddling hex at him so that he would take his time and I could browse his mind.

I envisioned the documents needed and summoned them.

As I flipped through them, a grin slowly formed on my face.

Petyr Baelish was going down… as soon as I could safely expose him without looking like I sneaked into his private office and stole records from the royal treasury.

Next Day

I walked away from the great hall where court was held in the Red Keep.

I abhorred attending court with a passion. Why in the seven hells would I care if Lord Lewis's heir defiled Lord Serrill's daughter? Lord Symon has a mistress? How interesting. Lady Gerbod is actually fucking the steward and they're his children not Lord Gerbod's? Wonderful!

I could get all this information from my personal army of spies or from the Maesters whom reported to the citadel regularly and who in return worshiped the ground that I walked on.

All so unnecessary.

After an excruciating amount of time that had every Lord and Lady buttering me up and jumping in front of me in each step, I finally passed the doors of the Great Hall and into the corridor.

This is exactly why I like having Nagini with me. She scares anyone who doesn't really need me away.

"A word if I may, Lord Stark?" A voice said softly.

I recognized the perfume and turned around, "Of course, Lord Varys."

The plump eunuch smiled at me and motioned for me, "I find a walk in the gardens comforting and ideal for our type of chats."

I nodded and followed him outside into the gardens.

"It seems that the wolf isn't particularly on good terms with a certain mockingbird." He said, letting out a little laugh.

I rolled my eyes, "The wolf's problem is with the incompetence and inefficiency of the mockingbird and other flaws…"

He smiled at me, "Perhaps I, as well as my birds, could prove beneficial and helpful to you."

"And how would you help me?" I asked.

"If two members of the small council, one of them the warden of the west and a personal friend of the king and the other the Master of Whispers approach the king and the hand in a matter of corruption. The king and the Hand would be amiable to listen."

I nodded, "And it would provide us free reign over the mockingbird's nest."

He laughed, "Nests my lord actually."

I raised an eyebrow, "And you are aware of the location of these nests?"

He smiled at me silently.

I nodded at him, "Very well, We will approach Robert with the issue tomorrow."

The Great Hall, The Mocking Bird's Fall.

I checked over the records and documents one more time before I set off with Varys towards the Iron throne.

Robert was sitting looking bored out of his mind and the dutiful Jon Arryn was standing beside him actually holding court.

Jon frowned and muttered an apology to the lord he was talking to and addressed us, "Lord Stark, Lord Varys?"

I smiled at him, "We have an issue to present, my lord hand."

His frown deepened while Robert straightened up, "I'm sure we can solve it at the Small Council."

"It is an urgent matter and cannot wait until tomorrow, Lord Arryn." I said.

He nodded, "Very well, let us retire to a more private room then."

I smiled, "Please invite the rest of the council members here as well."

I smiled, "Please invite the rest of the council members here as well."

As much as I wanted to expose Baelish infront of the hundreds of Lords and Ladies, I couldn't. It would be a political nightmare if anyone found out. So we just followed Robert and Jon into the room.

"What is the matter here?" Robert asked gruffly, annoyed that someone annoyed one of those he considers kin, even though we really aren't related in anyway or form.

As the rest of the council members took their places looking confused, Varys opened, "We have stumbled upon an interesting problem my lord. The contents of these…."

I interrupted, "Baelish is stealing from the crown."

Varys stumbled a bit and glanced at me but nodded nevertheless.

Baelish's eyes widened and his face paled considerably as he stuttered in outrage as I interrupted him, "This is a formal accusation from a Lord of a great house as well as two of your small council members, perhaps you would allow us to inspect the records of the finances to prove our case, your grace?"

Robert frowned and nodded, "Very well."

As we relocated towards the Master of Coin office Baelish seemed to be getting increasingly sweaty and nervous and glancing at the Kingsguard every once in a while.

"Ah! Here we are," I said with a smile, "If you could bring us the past tourney's expenses, Lord Baelish?"

He nodded nervously and brought the records as we gathered on a round table.

I hummed, "You have borrowed 70 thousand for the tourney correct?"

He nodded silently and I added, "The prize for the tourney is 50,000?"

"So 20,000 for the preparations of the tourney?" I asked, "Oh here is where they've gone. The most expensive wine for everyone and it seems you've actually overpaid every servant, worker and paid for the most expensive food and what is this?" I asked with a grin, "50 dragons for a wench? Perhaps I should leave the North and come work here as a wench if your wenches earn this much in a month."

He stumbled and I went on, "The terrible thing however is that this doesn't match up, the amount of barrels of wine you've written here doesn't equate the number that is actually bought as well as many other inconsistencies."

I looked at him with a grin, "Too many inconsistencies and overpaid workers that some might think you're… stealing."

He looked at us nervously, "My lords, I will make sure that the scribes are punished and replaced immediately."

I waved him off, "Ah don't blame them for this. If you look at these tourneys, you can clearly see that Lord Baelish almost always overpaid and paid for too much wine and food." I said, "Coincidentally, your businesses don't provide the amount of money needed for your huge investments."

I looked at him directly in the eye and growled, "So where is the money, Lord Baelish?"

"My lords, your grace," Baelish spoke trying to reduce his stammer, "I was thinking of the crown's best interests in these investments."

He cleared his throat and went on, "I was always your loyal servant, your grace. Whenever the crown needed money, I provided."

"By embezzling and stealing from the crown," I asked with an amused glint in my eye, "Some of the gold that was stolen is under the cellar in your kitchens that can only be opened by a stone with a lever, that we know of."

Varys continued, "Now we wonder, where the little lord of the Vale is hiding the Crown's money?"

Robert clearly had enough and roared, "You fucking stealing worm," and promptly bashed Baelish's head on the mocking bird bronze statue a couple of times, turning it into goo.

I took a look at the goo that was previously Baelish's head, "Well that was nice."

Jon who was oddly silent cursed surprisingly and said, "I can't believe that my own bannerman would betray my trust in this fashion and commit treason."

"It took Lord Varys and I a lot of spies and hard work to uncover his plots and tracks," I said.

Jon added with a tone that I didn't like, "Perhaps you could be the Master of Coin, Lord Stark."

Pycelle chimed, "A most excellent proposal. Lord Stark's studies in accounting and arithmetic at the citadel and his business dealings and praise from his partners sh ow his efficiency and suitability for this position."

Robert grunted and said, "So be it, Bran is the new Master of Coin. Fix this dip shit," He pointed at Baelish, "fuck ups."

I smiled tightly, "You honor me with your trust my lords."

This was absolutely agonizing. The entire treasury and accountants and key holders were Petyr Baelish's. They couldn't provide me with accurate results because they didn't actually know anything. I dismissed all of them except for 2 accountants that I ordered them to decipher Baelish's records and numbers.

The only clear answer I was able to gain was that the crown was in debt to the Iron Bank with 2 million dragons and Tywin Lannister another 2 million dragons. One of the privileges of being a Master of Coin was that your praise and work was noticed pretty quickly, on the other hand any decay or corruption was thrown at my legs.

I could either cause the throne to be more in debt to me and less to Tywin Lannister, but that would serve no actual purpose. A Faceless man would take care of Robert if he refuses to pay or even I could overtake the throne myself. But something about conquest by finances sounded a bit silly to me.

I was so deep in my thoughts that I almost didn't notice the ethereal squat little figure with short, grey, wavy hair wearing a patched hat covered in dirt and earth.

"Professor Sprout?" I asked incredulously.

Unsurprisingly, she didn't answer. She just kept shaking her head at me.

I closed my eyes with a sigh, "I understand professor."

She kept shaking her head, "I should let the kingdoms decay then?" I suggested uncertainly.

More shaking, "I'm seriously confused right now."

She just shook her head even more which caused me to lose my temper, "You do realize I could trap your soul for eternity in the lowest pit in hell?" I asked sweetly.

Her eyes widened in shock and she disappeared with a puff of smoke.

I took one long look at the records and just sighed.

Once a badger, always a badger.