CXXVI ||| Hate Me If You Want

After we ended our first daily training, my phone buzzed.

Hanna: Hel, Hel, Hel,

Me: Hanna, Hanna, Hanna,

Hanna: You father said he's in love with somebody else.

Hanna: I'm giving up on him.

I blinked surprised, my eyes going to Cosmos who was sparring a bit with Oliver, after he noticed we were weird and calling each other by our names. Did he said that to her? I mean, I was already going to do it.

{"Who?"} He asked as Dangerously by Charlie Puth began to play.

Ugh. Stop hearing my thoughts, Oliver-Sean.

{"Impossible, Wilhelmina. So, who?"}

Hanna. He already said he wasn't interested.

{"Oh, did he broke her heart? Like you're breaking mine?"}

Stop. These are totally different situations!

Growling, I let out a bunch of curses, and Rio popped up behind me, "Let me guess, mind-fighting Oli, new girl?"

I glared at him, "What do you want?"

"Why are you two weird with each other?" He narrowed his eyes.

"It's because I'm an arsehole," I said bluntly and looked down at my phone, not wanting to stare at his face, remembering all father told me about Rio and how he has a shit life too.

Me: I'm sorry, babe.

Me: Are you okay?

"I doubt she'll be if she was in love with him!" He said, still looking at my phone from over my shoulder, give how tall he is. "Stupid question."

"Shut the fuck up, cotton candy baby blue hair, will you?" Ugh.

Hanna: Oh, I'm fine.

Hanna: In fact, I want your help,

Hanna: *baiting eyelashes gif*

"Oh? Seems like she wasn't that in love with daddy-dearest," he chuckled. "Good for her. She's not broken hearted," why is she still here? "I mean, he is hot, but an arsehole," he looked at me, "like you!"

Me: Anything you want, babe.

I glared at him, "I see, you're taking his pain, uh?"

"Yes, I am, so what? He's hurting. It's your fault," his tone was a serious one for a change. "Mate or not, you can't hurt him like that."

So, they do have his back even if they are scared of me. "Do you know what I'm doing that's is hurting him?"

"We all know," he growled. "You want to break the bond."

"I'm trying to protect him."

But he's not having it, "That will only break him. The bond is not something you can break, Hel. And foolishly trying to do something so bloody dumb, will break Oli, and you. You are only wasting some precious time that you should be using to enjoy the fact that you are mated. You may not know, but it's fucking rare to find you mate. Especially after you've been out of stasis for such little time. And you want to break it?"

"He's right," River popped up on my other side, glaring at me. "Oli is my brother, you are hurting him with your stubbornness, thus hurting us."

In an instant, the other four surrounded me on my front. Irene, Igor, Nevena, and Dimitry. All annoyed, and with a reason to be. "I get that you are angry with me, and you are right to be. I am being an arsehole, and even a bitch if you want to curse me further. But I've made my point on this from the very moment your brother began to try making me fall in love with me. I told him he could try, but even if I fell, I would still try to break it, because I, personally, think it would be a way to protect him."

"That was before you knew him," Irene snapped.

"You know him now," Nevena added, annoyed.

"I do, yes. And he knows me. Believe me, we've been fighting for this for a while now, I know what he thinks and he knows what I do." More literally than they can phantom. "I know this might be a waste of time and that you might all end up being right, and I wrong. But I prefer to try my all before diving in, because if he dies on the hand of you know who, because of me, because he's my mate, I do not want to crucify myself for not trying to save him when I could. For not going for an alternative that could have avoided his death," I clenched my jaw annoyed.

"I'll stay with him. I'm not running away from this. I'm trying to do what I can to avoid that scenario, because I'm paranoid, and if I just give in right now and dive in this with him, I know I'll regret my decisions later on, if the worse happens. Just as I regret what happened when my mom died. I'm not going to do what my biological father did, and runaway while mated with him, because of fear. But I need to try this out, to be able to live with myself."

"I get it if you want to stay pissed at me, really. I do. I would be too if I was in your position right now. I do not expect any of you to understand my side, nor him, because I know we diverge on this. And that's okay. I've always understood that it's normal to have a different view on things, and I don't mind if we keep fighting because of this, because he's fighting for what he thinks it's right, and I'm doing the same. It's not that I do not want to be with him, because I do, if that wasn't already obvious."

"I just don't want to give myself such luxury without taking the measurements necessary to be sure that it's okay for me to let myself go for it, to be with him with no reservations like he's with me." Especially when I don't think I'm necessarily worthy of this. "If it's really unbreakable, then fine. If it's not, then I'll do what I think it's right to keep him alive," I would not mind dying afterwards in this scenario. I mean, dying to destroy the Dragon Queen and his parents sounds like a good death. Better than live millennials without a real reason. "You can hate me, if you want!"

Ignoring their intense glares on me, I looked down at my phone, feeling his eyes burn on me from the other side of the arena.

Hanna: Do you know Micah?

Hanna: The hot lion shifter who works at BABS.

My eyes widened softly, "Damn, she's quick," I gasped.

Me: Of course, he's one of the wardens.

Me: He's the warden supervising my team, by the way.

Me: Why? *mischievous grin emoji*

Hanna: *blushing sticker*

Hanna: I think he flirted with me when I landed on the island some hours ago. He was all grins and winks. That's flirting, right?

I turned to Micah, who was watching Oliver and father sparring at the side, with Atticus. "Micah!" I yelled and he turned to me. They all did, actually. "Micah!" I called again, laughing.

He narrowed his eyes, "Should I be scared?"

"That depends. Are you single?" Let's be direct.

His eyes went to Oliver who had a murderous glare on, a very, very hot murderous glare, if I may. "Uh, tell me it's for someone older than you!"

{"Hot murderous glare?"} Ugh.

"I'm two thousand years old, you know that, right?" I scoffed. "But if you mean, physically, yes. She's older than me. I think she's older than me in both ways, but she's hot, and cute."

His pale face turned three shades red, "Then I'm single!"