A warm welcome and chatting with the clown of clowns

'Well, my luck must be nonexistent if I'm meeting the sin of lust. That's just great, juuuust flipping fantastic. The guy's probably a powerhouse that could possibly squish me like a bug, mmm, depending on whether he can gain power from lust or not. My certainty for him being powerful was on a fifty-to-fifty scale.'

'On one hand, he could gain power every time a sinner was horny, or, he gained power each time a sinner was thrown down into hell and into the lust ring, uhm, there's a lot of speculative idea's that could lead to how he gains his power, and how powerful he is. This is why I felt as if I was entirely in the shitter when it came down to my luck.'

'I had thought that my luck had taken a turn for the better, apparently, I was wrong. Ugh, now it's even more stress on my shoulder's having to be confronted by fricking lust incarnate, just great. Hmm, maybe I could get my luck boosted by V? How would that even work? Is luck even an actual thing? Would he just give me some sort of blessing to make me more prone to better thing's happening for myself?'

'Ugh...I just wanted to enjoy a nice meal...now I have to deal with this...'

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'Seriously? Of all the places I could've gone to eat something, I just had to choose the place that was owned by the very definition of lust itself. And he's even paying his attention to me! Maybe it won't be as bad as I think it will? Maybe he's really thoughtful and nice? That could make this a bit salvageable.'

'I'll just smile and wave, there's no hostility coming from him so no need to worry, right? Well, if he does act hostile, we'll see where that situation goes. But for now? I'm going to stay and take my time in choosing a dinner option that'll fit my tastes.'

'However, it didn't seem as if Asmodeus was contempt with my silence. So, he tried getting me to come to him instead.' "Why not come up and here and give a proper hello! I'd for one would quite appreciate it~" 'Shiver me timbers, this man just doesn't get the message, does he?'

'Standing up from my chair I cracked my back a bit, twisting and turning, and finally, shadow melding behind him by using his very own shadow.' "Well, if you insist." 'I said, walking up next to him.'

'My usage of shadow melding in public wasn't something I was worried about showing. Someone being capable of stopping me from using it would be most likely hard to come across, most likely because they'd have to have some sort of ability or skill that could cancel out what I can do. In which case, I hope never comes to pass, but I'm certain that there's many faces out there in the vastness of hell and even heaven, that could, if they so wished too.'

'Asmodeus wasn't fazed in the slightest, seeing he could teleport as well, from what I first saw.' "Glad to see you listened. Didn't want to have come down there and get you myself! Hahaha!" 'Yeah, no. I'd prefer walking on my own two feet, even though I didn't use my feet to get here.'

'I began to laugh along with him. The laughter lasted for only a few short second's before we looked to one another, the atmosphere between the two of us immediately becoming tense.' "So, why are you here? To make a means to end? Some sort of deal in my establishment I'm unaware of? Because, you've gotten my full attention." 'Woah, full one-eighty on his welcoming attitude. Ok, this is a minefield I'm treading on. Have to be careful, don't want any unnecessary trouble.'

'With his friendly attitude all but gone, I continued to stand there with a warm smile.' "Not at all! I'm simply here for a meal to enjoy. When I first started looking for a place to eat, I saw the name of Ozzie's and it made me think of an Australian steakhouse, but I was wrong! Thus, I spent hour's traveling for something I wasn't expecting." 'There were no intentions of me causing trouble, so, best to tell the truth to get this done and over with.'

'And yet, before I could even speak, I felt something plop down onto my shoulder.' "Ha! As if he'd believe that! There's no fucking way you came to Ozzie's on an accidental whim! The chances that of that happening are about much as me being able to shit gold bars!" 'What the fuck! Where'd this clown guy come from!?'

'With my startled heart beating fast, I was about to speak my mind, but I didn't get the chance as Asmodeus beat me to the punchline.' "Fizzarolli, what'd I tell you about staying back? I warned you on how dangerous this guy is! If something were to happen to you, well...I don't even want to think that!" 'Am I hearing concern in his voice? And second of all, I haven't even shown any intent of hurting anyone, jeez!'

'Fizzarolli, the name of the apparent mishmash of colors, seemed to disagree, quite boastfully might I add.' "Oh please! If he wanted to try something, he'd have to catch me first! And that's if he even can, which he won't. He'd probably get tired after a few steps, seeing he uses that fancy pants trick of his! I bet he's super unfit and unhealthy!" 'He looked to me before sticking out his tongue.'

'Damn, his voice sounds weird. It's as if someone's gargling gravel then smoked hundreds of cigarettes all at once.' "Well, there'd be no reason for me to try anything. Meaning, simply no need for trouble needing to be caused me, thus, I'll be as welcoming and friendly as a grandma on Christmas." 'I said, crossing my heart with a wink.'

'Yet I wasn't even close to being quiet.' "And I bet your just jealous you can't do what I can. I mean, I understand! My ability is pretty neat, and useful might I add. With you looking like a clown, I'd bet that you'd use this trick to do your awful gimmicks twice as fast! Yet, no matter how fast you are, those stunts of yours will never be worth seeing!" 'We were glaring at each other; he was seething while my flames were dancing a bit more wildly. He pushed a button by pretty much calling me fat, which I'm not!'

"What the fuck did you just say!? I'll have you know that I'm damn good at what I do! If you even tried doing half of what I do, you'd probably just crash and burn! There'd be no point in paying to come and see your worthless show, if you even could put one on!" 'Oh no he didn't! This is going to get heated, really soon!'

'And I scoffed at his words, butting heads with him as I stared him down.' "Oh please! Of course I wouldn't be able to do what you can do! It's because I don't waste my time on useless kitty tricks that'll only ever be useful for chump change!"

'We were both gazing at each other intensely by this point, but, we couldn't continue seeing we were put to a stop by someone's intervention.' "ENOUGH! Both of you, be quiet! As much as I love to see you boy's getting into some personal action, it's gotten a bit dry! Now, Fizzarolli, get off his damn shoulder and get over here!" 'Heh, he's being coddled like some sort of child.'

'Fizzarolli huffed and jumped from my shoulder like a spring, landing into Asmodeus's arms.' "Fine! Only because you asked..." 'Hmmm, I'm sensing something fishy about them...'

"And you! 'Uh oh.' "Thank you for not hitting him." 'Huh?'

'My surprise for him thanking me was a bit of a slap to the face. Like, did he expect to hit him just for some words being thrown my way? How shallow does he think I am? I won't stand for such an accusation!'

'It was time to speak my mind.' "Well, I didn't actually plan on getting physical with him. Truth be told, I don't know why I would. It was just a heated spat, nothing more and nothing less." 'That seemed to ease his worries.'

'But Fizzarolli seemed adamant on continuing to speak his mind.' "Hold up! You're not even mad anymore?! What about everything I said? Was your anger just a front?" 'Make's sense that he doesn't understand why I'm not upset.'

'Looked like this clown wasn't one of the silent ones, figured as much.' "Nnnnooope! You only got me upset because of calling me fat, which I'm not. And secondly, I don't hold grudges." 'That doused his energetic mood, looks like he was expecting more from me.'

"Ah man! You got my hopes up for nothin! I was eager for a ruckus..." 'Sorry to break it to you my little amigo, but I'm hungry and not in the mood, so, I'm trying to keep my emotions in check.'

'And was he really wanting a fight to break out? Wouldn't that have been bad for business? Or do people enjoy a good spat and tussle in this place? Not like it's going to be my problem, unless I have to make it my problem. Ugh, only been down here in hell for a day and it almost led to me fighting the lust sin, how fun.'

'Should start keeping a record of all the unfortunate thing's that have befallen me in such a short time. Maybe try and see if I can register for a world record. The idea of buying a good luck charm sound's pretty appealing, might just do that later. It'll probably save my life, maybe, possibly.'

'I'm getting off topic, let's get back to the current situation I'm in.' "So, are we all calm? No more senseless violence? I'd prefer no harm coming my way, same goes for the both of you as well." 'My calm attitude confused the both of them. They didn't look all that used to talking so someone who was as calm as I am, which I am calm, but also stressed beyond belief. Heh, if only they knew how I really felt right now...'

'Looking to Asmodeus, I waited for him to say something, He is the owner of the establishment after all. My gaze lingered on him for a few seconds until he finally realized I was waiting for him to speak up.' "Ah, yes. That wouldn't be all that great for my public image! Then again, I am known for all sorts of stuff, if you know what I mean, eheh~" 'I couldn't help shiver at his last words. Getting freaky with the sin of lust is not on my to-do list, not anytime soon, or most likely never.'

'Enough said, it's time I get back to my table and get something to eat. That is the reason I came here. So, no point dilly dallying when I could be stuffing my stomach with food.' "Now, as lovely as it has been chatting with you two, may I go back to my table and sit down? I was preparing to make an order." 'My request seemed to make Asmodeus freeze on the spot, then chuckle with an embarrassed smile.'

"O-oh! Of course. I apologize on my behalf, and Fizzarolli's." 'He sighed, looking down for a moment as he mulled over his thoughts.' "To be honest, I was planning on making a joke out of you. When you first arrived, I suspected you were up to something. But now? I see that's not the case. So please, eat to your hearts content for tonight, my treat!" 'Well, I suppose that's fair.'

'I nodded, a grin tugging at the corner of my lip's as I looked at the two of them.' "Well thank you, mister Asmodeus. But, before I leave, mind if you do something for me? It won't really take long, just a few words between me and you, that's all." 'Curiosity was etched on his face as he looked at me.' 

'The big guy reluctantly agreed, not seeing any harm in granting a small request.' "As long as it's not to crazy, then I'm all down for it. So, what do you need from little Ol me?" 'Pff, little.'

'Stifling a chuckle, I walked over, standing close to him.' "May I have your contact information so we can chat from time to time?" 'Then I looked down to the troublemaker.' "Same goes for you as well. Even though you accused me of attempting something so scandalous, I'm still not mad at all. So I find no harm in asking for your friendship as well."

'Asking for their contact information garnered a mixed reaction. Asmodeus seemed overeager to give me his number, while Fizz seemed hesitant, almost as if what I asked for was something he was uncomfortable with.' "Well, that's more than ok! I don't see any problems with having you as a possible drinking buddy." 'Responded Asmodeus, snapping his fingers as a parchment appeared in front of my face.'

'Reaching my hand out I grabbed the paper, stuffing it into my pocket for later viewing.' "Wonderful! Now, how about you my little friend?" 'I glanced down to Fizz, waiting for his response.'

'But, it seemed I wasn't going to get a response just yet.' "Why? Why would you ask for our contacts? Are you gaining something out of this?" 'Asked Fizz, locking his eyes with my shades, trying to see if he could read my face, or find some sort of deceit.'

'Well, I'll give him props for his caution.' "I've been attempting to build a positive reputation in hell, so I figured having you as possible associates, even friends, would be a great boon to a much more welcoming lifestyle for myself, and possibly for other's as well. Second of all is the fact I'm wanting more friends to...hang around with. It's been a successful task thus far, so, I'm still hoping to make my list of friendly associates lengthier." 'That seemed to put him at ease, so he reached into the sleeve of his uniform and held out a piece of paper. It looked as if he was already prepared to give out his contact information, hm, makes him seem like a resourceful person.'

'I lowered my hand to his, stopping briefly from the paper, before softly clasping his hand with both of mine. He was confused as to why I had clasped his hand, so, before he could speak up, I beat him to it.' "You can trust me when I say that I'll never break your trust. I swear on my soul, and everything that I am, that I will not forget about you or Asmodeus." 

'My word's made his eye's widen, a flicker of recognition dashing across his face. It was as if he recalled something, something he hadn't thought of in quite some time.' "T-thanks, I'll uh...make sure to stay in contact with you as well." 'Mumbled Fizzarolli, looking away from me as he pulled his hand out of my grasp.'

'Smiling, I stood back up. Tucking the paper into my pocket and turning to look at Asmodeus again.' "And for a second request, make sure to give the bouncer at the front a raise. He's a friendly fellow, so, I thought of asking his boss, which is conveniently you, to do such a thing for him." 'The second request I made seemed to make him curious, before realizing who I was talking about.'

"Ohhh! You mean Jesse? Yeah, alright. I'll make sure to increase his pay." 'I nodded in satisfaction.'

'Saying nothing else, I did a small bow and turned back to the crowd. It appeared that those who were paired up with a partner were in hushed conversations, most likely attempting to figure out what we were discussing. It's best I address the problem, which there is none.'

'Walking up to the mic I tapped it a few times, clearing my throat as I looked to all of them.' "Pardon me, I couldn't help but realize that we left you all in the dark. So, I apologize for this small transgression. There's nothing to be worried about, it was simply a small conversation with me and my new future business partner." 'I looked back to Asmodeus and winked at him; in which case he was shocked by my words. Heh, threw a curve ball your way without you ever even suspecting a thing.'

'That was that, I walked off the stage and back to my table. Now that everything's been situated, I'll finally get to enjoy a meal. In which case I had to grab the attention of a certain waiter, luckily my eyes were able to catch the previous one I had before.'

'Smiling his way, I waved my hand to gain his attention, calling him over. In a short few seconds, he was already standing before me, arms folded at his side as he looked up to meet my gaze.' "How may I be of service, sir?" 'He asked, already prepping himself for some more work.'

'Picking up my menu I flipped it around and lowered it to his face, tapping the order I wished for. It was a steak with lambchops on the side, as well as a nice refreshing glass of wine' "I'm quite ready to order, so, my choice will be the Devil's Delight. There were so many food choices to choose from, so I simply had to pick the one that interested me the most!" 'It was a hard choice, so many interesting options and yet I only wanted something to satisfy me.'

'As soon as I said my order, he grabbed out a notepad and wrote it down, before looking up to me and bowing, taking his leave to the kitchen to pass on the request. My, how efficient he is. Seems no one likes to waste time down here in hell.'

'Satisfied with getting what I wanted, I sat back in my chair. There was not much for me to do. I could play on my phone, or call someone. But I wasn't in the mood for either. What to do...what-to-do...'

'Turning my head to the side I gazed at the other tables, looking at who was here, and who wasn't. The place was filled with all sorts of devilish looking figures. It'd be funny trying to make some sort of fancy-stained glass art with the way some of these folks looked.'

'The music was catchy; it had a beat to it that you just couldn't dislike. Everything screamed for attention, the sounds, colors, the workers. It was kind of an eye candy to me, seeing so much stuff that I would have never even considered seeing up close and personal. This trip was proving to be something I gladly approved of.'

'Sadly, I was alone to enjoy it. The loneliness was a bitter thing, but I wasn't in the mood for a lover just yet. Having a lover would complicate thing's drastically, which was a chance I wasn't willing to take. It would lead to major implications of trouble, the list of things that could go wrong for me would be practically endless.'

'My mood began to dampen as I sat alone in my seat, with nobody to talk with face to face. Maybe I could get up and dance? Mmm, no, nobody else is dancing. I'd just make myself seem like a fool.'

'So, I just continued to sit in silence, waiting for my food to come so I could enjoy it. Minutes passed; the waiting game was intense, full of action-packed awesomeness that could make your brain explode from the euphoric thrill of fun. Mhm, definitely having fun here.' 

'Finally fed up with my boredom, I looked around my table, seeing if there was something to do, which there was. A pamphlet was tucked neatly under the chair I was in. Seemed to be some means of advertisement for this place.'

'Flipping open the small booklet I began to read, and oh boy was it an eye sore. It was different from what I had first thought. This place is not what I expected it to be. It was a fucking, er, fuck house.'

'This establishment was the hotspot for all your nastiest or weirdest desires and kinks. Ranging from foreplay to chastity teasing to even BDSM. I kept on reading, not being able to help myself as I looked through the whole thing. It...it was disgusting, and somehow slightly appealing.'

'No, the thing's it proposed was not what caught my interest, but the idea of them. Asmodeus really lived up to his reputation as the biggest sex craved bastard there is. A shit plethora of these options were mainly created by him and only him. Every time I read further down; his signature would be next to one of the option's you could choose from.'

'But that wasn't all, oh no, it was much more than just that. Apparently, he also owned the biggest sex toy industry in all of hell. I...I should not be surprised, and yet I still am. The ball's this man must have to openly do this without a care in the underworld must be ginormous.'

'Also, the booklet felt...sticky. Looking closer at the pamphlet I noticed it was...ew. No, just no, and more no.' "That's just wrong..." 'Gagging in disgust I tossed the pamphlet to the side, slowly falling to the ground until it sat there, as if taunting me and calling me a sissy.'

'Closing my eye's, I took a deep breath in and let it out. Just relax, your food will be here any second now. Patience is needed, patience is key.' 'Your order, sir." 'Opening my eye's, I looked down and to the side, seeing my trusty buddy waiting before me with a silver platter in his grasp. Of course, he had to carry it overhead.'

'Grinning in satisfaction I took the tray from him, easing his burden as I sat it down on the table.' "Thank you, and I wish you a wonderful night." 'Being thankful was one of the many manners I was taught growing up. Being appropriate at the dinner table was a must in society, especially in public.'

'The waiter showed his thanks as well, bowing and saying his appreciation in return.' "And a thank you as well, for coming to our lovely abode and dining with us." 'With that, he took off, going to take care of other's orders and requests.'

'Turning my head back to the tray, I reached out and grabbed the upper handle and pulled off the covering. Steam slowly arose off the finely prepared meal as I stared at it, and it looked utterly delicious. The coloring of the meat was just perfect, for both the steak and lamb. Heh, wonder what Collin would think if he saw me eating lambchops.'

'Reaching out I grabbed my rolled-up silverware, untucking the napkin around them and putting it into my lap, then, grabbed the knife and fork as I began to cut into my steak. The tenderness of the streak was utterly beautiful, the amount of juice it emanated from its pores was bountiful.'

'Cutting the steak more, I couldn't help but drool slightly. The aroma was intoxicating to my nose, and my stomach rumbled in agreement. The coloring of the steak on the inside was perfect, no pink or red even being seen. Every piece I cut off, more of the flavor wafted into the air.'

'The meat was bigger to fit my size, which I'm glad, seeing it would make my meal more enjoyable. Even the wine glass was bigger than the one's I had recently glimpsed at and used. Man, I just couldn't wait to take my first bite and savo-' "If you keep staring at your meal like that, some might start thinking your crazy." 'And que my gaze snapping towards the voice I recognized, which was Fizz, my new buddy.'

'He was as silent as a mouse, and yet as chatty as a kid pepped up on laughing gas after a visit to dentist.' "What if I'm already crazy?" 'I couldn't help but joke, had to defend myself! Even if my argument was claiming his words to be true...'

'Fizzarolli snorted at that, looking up to me and smirking.' "Then you'd be considered batshit crazy. And I already know what crazy is, because I'm a certain type of crazy!" 'Boisterously claimed Fizz, throwing his arms wide and laughing loudly.'

'He's like me, ADHD and Autistic, but willing to be loud and proud about it in public. He'd make a perfect salesmen pitcher at a car dealership.' "Then welcome to the club, no wait, I'm sure you already got one somewhere here in hell." 'Heh, it's nice throwing around a few friendly jabs with a friend, even if I barely know them.'

'Fizz chuckled, scratching his chin in embarrassment.' "Weeeell, I already got a good few of those. So, if you want to join, then just ask me for a form and I'll send it your way." 'Really? He does? Huh, imagine that.'

"Really?" 'I had to know; I was curious after all.'

'He laughed, clutching his stomach as he doubled over.' "Fuck no I don't! There's no way I'd bunch myself up with twisted freaks like those! I'd rather cut off my own tongue then risk grouping up with a bunch of crazy fans in a single place!" 'Well, he's quite straight to the point. No filter on him, no sir, no filter at all.'

'I couldn't help but laugh along with him. It was an interesting thought as well, especially if I were famous like hi-wait, did he say fans? How exactly is he popular?' "Wait, did you say fans? What do you mean fans?" 

'That immediately shut him up, and he cast a confused look my way. The face was he was giving me was one of 'What the fuck did you just say?' "Hold on-hold-on-hold on!" 'He waved his arms around.' "Don't tell me you don't know about me! I'm Fizzarolli the clown! Popular figure to children all around! From being branded on cereal boxes to a renowned member of LooLoo Land! I've even got robotic sex models of myself!" 'He jumped into my face, clutching my cheeks as he spoke. Clearly, he thought I was joking, in which case I wasn't.'

'Invasion of my privacy was something I could handle, especially if I was being randomly touched. And seeing he was a friend, I let it slide.' "Mmm, never heard of you until today. I've been keeping to myself quite a bit lately...besides my escapades around hell and whatnot." 

'My response I gave seemed to knock the wind out of his sails, leaning back as he looked me up and down.' "You really aren't fucking with me? Even new sinners hear about me as soon as they're on the street's and licking each other's asses!"

'Huh, maybe I should look into his background when I leave? ...Wait a moment, did he say robotic versions of himself? Mainly used for sex and only sex? He has a set most likely bigger than mine if he's willing to do that. It's almost as if he's a perfect match for Asmodeus, seeing their both so open about themselves and who they are.'

'Imagine having a mechanical replica of yourself servicing fan's all-around hell. Your image would be permanently embedded into their perverted brains. He'd practically be asking to be jumped by some naked whack-job thinking he's down to do the dirty because he's willing to sell his body, even though it's a robotic version of himself.'

'The upside to his this was the fact that he was most likely loaded, probably capable of swimming in cash if he wanted too. Not like I'm jealous seeing I have an infinite source of funds to access.' "Sorry, but I've never even knew that you were a popular figure in society. I'll make it up to you and buy something with your face on it." 'I joked, clearly stating his mechanical self...which was an interest piquing idea.' 

'Reprieve wasn't given as he jumped back to my face, not done with chewing me out for my blindness of who he was.' "That's not good enough! I'll have to personally show you around LooLoo Land! Oh! I could even show you all the product's I sell! Asmodeus would love to show off what he can offer as well!" 'Oh jeez, I didn't want to peruse sex toy's as if I was going to buy some. Especially one's made by Asmodeus, that would be awkward for me, most likely not for him, the bastard would probably revel in me gazing at his work.'

'I wanted to object, but Fizzarolli seemed so happy that I couldn't object to his offer. It did sound tempting, the LooLoo Land visit, not the sex toy's part.' "I...suppose I could do that. I'll have to adjust my schedule to spare some time. How about in a few days from now? Because I'll be busy until then, so, by the time I'm done, I'll have plenty of time to spend with you."

'That got him jumping with joy, literally. He was like a spring jumping from place to place, which he sounded like one, kind of. Did he some sort of cartoony power that could make him seem like some sort of figure from those classic eighty's cartoons? That'd be interesting to confirm...even more interesting if was capable of doing such whacky things.'

"Ha-ha! I knew you'd be interested! Ohhh! It's been so long since I've been to LooLoo Land!" 'Been so long? Doesn't he work there as well?'

'Had to throw in my thoughts, obviously wanting to know what he meant by that.' "Been so long? Don't you work there as some sort of second job or something like that?"

'His response was to spin around and hop onto the table. At least he avoided stepping on my food...which might be cold by now...bummer...' "Yes and no, see, with robot versions of myself existing, I can have one work in my place! So, there's no reason for me to throw my back out for double the work!" 'Then he raised a hand to his face, cupping his cheek's as he looked up to me.' "This handsome face is just too busy to stay in one place for so long! I've got multiple projects and job's I have to deal with, which is a bore, but that's my life!" 

'That...sounded problematic and tiring. Looks like were both in the same boat buddy.' "And I'm assuming you don't know the state of the place?" 'Bet he didn't, my intuition was screaming he didn't.'

"Nope! And that's what's so exciting! Because I have no idea what to really expect! But I think I do..." 'I almost missed that last part, but he thinks he does? What's he mean by that?'

'Sighing, I grabbed the entire bottle of wine, guzzling it a bit before taking it away from my face. I didn't even know if this amusement part was still even open, for all I knew it could be closed and in need of repair. Le sigh~ What a troublesome life...just more to deal with...'

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New chapter! WOOH! I'll make sure to keep my word and start raking out the chapters like winning the lottery! 

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