CHAPTER THIRTY SIX

I woke up because of the annoying sound made by my alarm. I snoozed it, sighing and hugging tightly my pillow. Just five more minutes.

Unfortunately, the rays of sunshine projecting onto my eyelids didn't help me go back to sleep. I knew I should've got to my feet if I still wanted to go to the first class, but the tiredness made my eyes impossible to stay open. I started counting my absences, deciding if whether I should've gone or stayed in...

My phone started ringing and, with a frustrated groan, I picked it up from the nightstand next to me, answering it with an angry voice: "What?!"

"Where are you?! I'm already here and I can't see you!"

I sighed, pinching the bridge of my nose. I should've told her that I wasn't intending to go to the first class. "Sorry, Em, but I won't make it. I'm too tired."

"Nonsense. Yesterday in the club you weren't tired at all. Drink a coffee and move your ass here."

"You're so cruel!" I yelled at her, raising my upper body and throwing the pillow on the floor.

"Nah, nah, nah! You paid for university, you come to university! Your degree doesn't care how many shots you took yesterday! Be here in five!"

"How am I supposed to do that?!"

"Take a taxi! Love you!"

I opened my mouth, ready to say that I won't come anyway, but she hung up on me. I drew a deep breath and got to my feet. I sighed. It didn't matter anymore. I was already awake, so why shouldn't I have gone to university as well?

In five minutes I left the flat and, lucky me, I found a taxi the moment I stepped out of the building. I opened its door quickly and told the driver to go straight to Columbia University. He nodded and fired up the engine.

I sighed, admiring the beautiful New York City through the window, not believing that I was actually there. It was a dream come true, to be honest.

And the fact that I wasn't alone made me more comfortable than ever.

I arrived at the university in just seven minutes, which was a new record, given the terrific traffic. I ran towards the entry, where Emily was waiting for me. She crossed her arms over her chest as soon as she saw me and I grimaced, knowing she was going to scold me again for being late. "I told you five!" She said as I stopped in front of her, panting and holding on my knees.

"...seven... is fine..." I tried to say, but my lungs were screaming after oxygen, so I couldn't do much.

She rolled her eyes and gave me a dismissive wave of her hand. "It's been only a week since we started the second semester. Are you really going to fall behind already? If you keep it like this... then you can say bye-bye to your degree."

I rolled my eyes as I started following her towards our first class. We still had a few minutes until it officially began. "Don't worry about me. I can still pass my exams from the first attempt. Can you?"

She pursued her lips, throwing me a deadly glare. "Ouch. You're being quite angry these days. Are you sure you're fine?"

I sighed. "Yea. I am."

She threw me a look full of concern and I turned my head. I hated it when she pitied me. "Look. It's been more than a year and your family still hasn't contacted you. Sorry for saying this, but your mother is an asshole. Your birthday is tomorrow, for God's sake! She missed your birthday last year, will she miss this one too?! What kind of mother is that?!"

I faked a smile and just shrugged. "It's fine. She just... doesn't want me in her life anymore. I got over it. Let's stop talking about this, okay? I just want to live my life as it is."

She rolled her eyes, planting her feet in front of our classroom, and sighed. "Sorry. It just pisses me off. "

I sighed.

"Yea. I guess."

She opened the door and I followed her inside the classroom. The lecturer wasn't there yet, so we both sighed in relief and ran towards our seats. A few people saluted us and we waved back, as we sat on the chairs.

"Hey, Em." Jason said, leaning forward and forcing us to turn our heads towards him.

Jason was a really nice guy. A really nice guy who really liked Emily, ever since we moved to New York and met him on our first day at university. Emily told me she wasn't interested -she said something like "he's too Hawaiian for me". But, personally, I thought that his curly, blonde hair and brown eyes were his charms.

"What do you want?" She asked him, rolling her eyes.

I rolled my eyes as well, but at her.

Stop playing hard to get. We both know you kinda like him too.

"Have you heard the news? Robbie isn't coming anymore."

I and Emily widened our eyes and exchanged a meaningful look. "What are you talking about? That man loved Psychology. He wouldn't quit out of nowhere." I said, taken aback by this frightening rumor.

"It's true! I swear! My friend from the other year told me they have a new lecturer. He's really young, he said. But his hair is white!"

Young and white hair?

My heart started hammering in my chest and, involuntarily, Caiden's face appeared in front of my eyes. I shook my head.

There is no way. He said he's going to hell. He said we will never meet ever again.

"What the hell? I've never seen a young lecturer around here. I could've sworn that you have to be more than forty years old in order to work at this university." Emily scoffed, turning her back at him.

"It's true! All the girls from my friend's class are fangirling over him! He's really young!"

"Shut up, Jason. You're annoying."

Jason leaned back on his chair and sighed, frustrated. "Fine! You're gonna see with your own eyes! He has to come now!"

I frowned. Right. Mr. Robinson used to forget a lot of things, but he'd never been late at his own lectures. This is odd. Maybe he's right. Maybe he really quit.

"Then... why did he quit?" I asked Jason, feeling how the anxiety clenched my heart.

"What? You're believing him?! Ivy, what the hell?" Emily said, exasperated, but I ignored her completely.

"Dunno. I heard something about winning a lottery. Maybe he's in Greece now. You know how the old man loved Greece."

Jason grinned and I smiled. Well, if he really quit, then at least he's enjoying himself.

"If you know so many things, oh, you mighty Jason, then do you possibly know about a creep following young girls such as Ivy around this part of town?" Emily asked him, and I poked her ribs with my finger, making her throw me an annoyed look.

He frowned, looking straight into my eyes. "Are you being followed? Why didn't you contact the police? There are a lot of creeps out there. You should totally go straight to the police."

"No, no, it's fine. It's just... a strange feeling. It started a few weeks ago. I don't think there's someone following me." I said, emphasizing my words and looking at Emily, who was pursuing her lips like she thought she did nothing wrong.

I sighed. I told her to not say anything about this. Why is she so annoying?

The class was much more talkative than before. They seemed... curious. Excited. And I had only one thing in my mind which could've made sense: the new teacher. I sighed. I wasn't excited in particular. I was disappointed. I liked Mr. Robinson. Psychology wasn't so interesting for me in high school, but after I finished it... I sensed the urge to take this course. I felt like it was my fate to do something regarding it. I had a goal in my life, and I decided to follow it.

Emily wasn't into Psychology, not even now. She came because she didn't know what to do and her grades were pretty high to came to this university. Her parents were happy either way. She could've inherited her father's company after it, so it wasn't really a problem for her.

Neither for you. You have tons of money as well.

I shook my head. It wasn't my money. It was Caiden's. And I was intending to use it only when it was necessary. After I finish university, I'm gonna donate it. There's no point in using it if I have money by working my own job.

The door opening made me come back to reality and I blinked slowly, remembering something crucial.

My glasses. I forgot about them again!

After Caiden put me to sleep, when he left for good, I realized that the dizziness he gave me had an annoying adverse effect: my sight became so bad that I had to wear glasses. We were staying in the back and so, I couldn't clearly see the new lecturer's face.

"Emily." I whispered and she turned her head towards me, confused. "What is he looking like?"

She shrugged. "I have no idea. I forgot my contacts."

Damn.

I sighed.

And then the teacher started talking.

"Hello. My name is Shawn Harris. Nice to meet you all. I'm going to call out your names, so I can be familiar with your faces."

A lot of girls started giggling and I blinked slowly, my brows furrowing. Beads of sweat were trickling down my face and I could feel my hands sweaty.

I know that voice. I know that voice. I know that voice.

The lecturer started calling out names and I grabbed Emily's arm, making her flinch, surprised by my desperate gesture. "What the hell, Ivy?!" She whispered, annoyed.

"Do you recognize the voice?" I asked her, biting my nails, nervously.

"Uh... no? I mean, do you? What's with his voice?"

I took a deep breath and let go of her arm. No. I'm just imagining things. It's nothing.

I shook my head and she shrugged at me, turning her head towards the lecturer, even though she couldn't see him, just like me. I sighed, waiting patiently to finish this lecture, so I could go closer to him, to see his face.

I have to see his face. I really do.

He called out Emily's name and she said "here" with a bored, plain voice, and I realized that my name was coming right after hers. I took a deep breath and waited patiently for him to call out my name.

But he didn't. He stopped and the whole class started whispering, not sure of what was going on.

"Ivy Moore." He said, and I could've sworn that he said my name with a weird intensity.

"Here." I answered, with a voice full of emotion, even though I didn't know why.

What's happening? Why am I like that?

"You okay?" Emily asked me and I nodded.

I didn't want to talk about it. Actually, it wasn't like I could talk about it, because I had no idea what was going on. After this, he continued calling out the rest of the names with no incidents.

The rest of the course he talked about what we had to prepare for the exams and what books we should buy, by his recommendations. He also recommended coming at him whenever we had inquiries or if we wanted to borrow a certain book, even though he only had a few copies of each Psychology books we needed that year. Then, he dismissed us and the people got to their feet, walking down the stairs and hurrying up to get out of the class.

I tried to hurry up as well, but when I arrived in front of the huge blackboard, he wasn't there anymore. I sighed, frustrated.

I really wanted to see his face.

"Ivy! You coming? Our next course starts at two p.m., so we have plenty of time until then." Emily told me, with Jason next to her who was waving enthusiastically at me.

I smiled. This boy is really cute.

"Nah. You two should go ahead. I'm gonna... go to the library. I have a book I want to borrow."

"Want me to come with you?"

Jason placed his hands on his neck and faked suffocating and I had to gather all of my strength to not burst into laughter. "No. It's fine. I'll catch up with you guys later. Cya."

Emily blinked twice and shrugged. "'kay. If you don't come I'll just order you a hamburger. Is that fine?"

"It's perfect!" I said, smiling at her and then turning my head, walking towards the library.

I walked slowly, trying to delete every suspicion I had about the new lecturer. This is not healthy, Ivy. You promised yourself you're going to let go. Why are you doing this to yourself? You're pathetic!

I squeezed my eyes shut for a few seconds, planting my feet in front of the library's doors. I sighed, opening my eyes, and entering the library. There was no time to think about these kinds of things, which were clearly impossible. I had to take a Psychology book, go to the next courses, study hard and then go straight to the club. Tomorrow is my birthday. I have to party!

I walked slowly towards the place where the Psychology books were held, and I stopped in front of a lot of tiny shelves, full of books. I lowered my body, taking a book, and starting to read a bit from it. I needed a better book. This was looking exactly like the one I had home...

"Do you need some help?" Someone asked me, and I got to my feet quickly, looking to my left and right.

"I'm on the other part. I could see you searching a book down there. Want some help?"

I sighed, pressing a hand on my chest. "You scared me. You know, when you want to help someone, you can't talk from the other part. It seemed like a ghost talked with me."

He chuckled and the sound made my heart squeeze painfully. This sound...

"I apologize. I didn't know that frightens you. You were braver before."

I frowned, walking slowly around the shelves. "What do you mean?" I asked him, confused, as I kept walking, hoping he wasn't moving from there.

"I think you know what I'm talking about." He answered.

There is no way. This couldn't be...

I turned the corner quickly, but there was no one. I blinked slowly.

Why did he leave? He said he was on the other side!

I sensed something moving behind me and I pivoted quickly. My eyes widened as I was staring at his face.

No way...

Caiden was smiling at me, his black eyes boring into mine. "Were you looking for me, Ivy?"