Vicki & Danni

Vicki

      There seem to be so much to do an say with hardly any time for any of it! I sat baffled at how quickly Eva ran outta here. For a while I just needed a minute so I let the tears roll as my head fell back. I squeezed my eyes shut to stop the burn of my tears when I noticed Chase at Eva's office door frame...

    "You okay V" she said as walked in an sat on the edge of the desk in front of me. I lifted my head sighing "girl... what did I get myself into.." I let out as I exhaled. Chase kept her eyes fixed on my face "look at me... stop blaming yourself an pick yourself up" she brushed my hair out of my face then lifted my chin. "Look around you.. look at all you've accomplished... even well before Danni existed.. you made it through your mothers bullshit.. you can make it through this too" she bent down to hug me. I nodded as I held her back "thank you.. I know. I know... it just hurts" tears just ran down my face as I sat blank, feeling empty an confused.

    "Let's go to your office boo" Chase stood in front of me and gave me her hand. "I got you friend... come on" she stated as she helped me up. I drifted into my thoughts as we made our way to my office. "I  just don't know what possessed me to go this far... why wou-" we stopped dead in our tracks as we saw Danni coming up to the door. I turned to hug Chase and asked her to grab my purse for me.

Danni came in, walking straight towards me "you okay... you been crying" she asked as she grabbed my bag from Chase. "I'm fine baby.. let's just go. I'm ready to be home already" I answered as I begin to leave. "Okay..." she let out a small sigh as she followed me out waving to Chase.

     As Danni got into the car she spoke "rough day so far" I reclined the chair back a little an closed my eyes. I felt the car jerk to a stop an Danni put the car in park. "Yo what's up? You haven't had more then 3 sentences for me since our last real conversation... I feel like I'm fighting tooth an nail for something that you don't want for real. You're building this perception for me and I'm so confused because one day it's love the next it feels like hate" Danni turned the car off as she continued "we aren't leaving this spot till we figure this out" I sat up and looked around.

     "Danni we can't sit here... can we just talk at home ...please" I tried my best to look at her without frustration. Danni started the car back up an sped home, as soon as we pulled into the driveway she hopped out and made her way to my side. With a stern face she finally addressed me "so let's talk.. I'm not taking this in the home that we share one more day" I sighed stepped out the car. "Danni. Why do you feel like you have any right to demand anything of me? Like do you even hear yourself sometimes" I leaned back against the car trying my best to remain calm. I took a deep breath again preparing myself for her response.

"What so now I'm possessing you? Now it's an issue that I want to get to some type of resolve" she said with confusion an hurt in her eyes. "I don't know who or what you want anymore Vicki and that scares me" I wanted so badly to hold her an comfort her but something in me just said just wait. "I want to not feel lied to. I want to not be upset with you. I want to stop feeling negatively about us. I want the life I was promised... I want you Danni... but you don't want only me" I fought back tears as I went on "you want Everything without consequence an life just don't work like that. You can't love me, want me, Need me even an than turn right around and say you fuck other people just to please me. I never asked you for that. When did I ever even make you feel like that was an option? Like what was I doing or saying that gave you this form of insecurity" I asked looking directly at her. I waited for her eyes to reach mine "be honest.. we are here now" I said as I searched her eyes for truth.

Danni's eyes were sad but immediately went cold as she replied "insecurities? Yo you can't be serious right. Haha ..why would I be insecure about anything" she questioned. "I don't know D that's why I'm asking... what did I do or had I done to make you choose other people instead of just coming to me" a tear fell an she placed her hand on my cheek. I moved my head away from her hand "just be honest with me... please" my eyes pleaded with hers as I mouthed "please" my head dropped.

                                     Danni

     I took in a deep breath, preparing myself to be honest. Not only with her... but with myself.

I lifted her chin to look me in my eyes again then spoke "Vicki... Before you.. I was so lost. I was so done with everything. I sat around wasting my time with a lot of bullshit and even more bullshit ass people.  So it was easy to act like nothing and no one else mattered. It was never a thought in my mind to get married and settle down..but ...When I met you ...Victoria ... life was just different. MY life was different! All of a sudden made sense.. I don't know what I got out of any of that dumbass shit for real. I mean seriously if you ask Eva I never had a nice thing to say about Alia. Every time we talked I would tell myself that's it she's done. Then the day before I saw Eva I just decided enough was enough. So I called her and told her I was done for good an ready to just be in Asiahs life only. When I saw Eva I can't even begin to explain what it was.. It just was, ya know" Danni leaned against the car in front of me getting close enough for me to really see her eyes, as the sun started to set. "I never mea..." she hung her head clearing her throat a little. "I never tho... I'm so sorry" Danni tried to look back up at me but couldn't as she started bawling her eyes out.

    "Are you in love with her... I already know y'all love each other... but are you in love with her" Vicki asked as she lifted my head to look at her again. I shrugged my shoulders and shook my head. "I don't know honestly... I don't even know how to answer that if I knew" Vicki's hand released my face an she pushed my chest. "I'm ready to go inside now" I stepped aside to let her head inside. I reached for her hand to pause her for a moment "I am sorry Victoria..." she nodded without even looking back an pulled her hand away. 

     All I could do was lean back against the car, trying my best to process every bit of my parts in all this... Mess!