8. Heaven makes you poetic

My eyes opened to a white ceiling, plain white without a crack. White was a color of peace, harmony, innocence, purity, positivity and safety, but this ceiling represented nothing as the color white suggested. The perfect white wall made me feel uncomfortable, like if I stared for one more second I would go insane. I got up and looked around my surroundings, trying to understand where I was.

The room was white, everywhere I looked. There was no furniture. I walked further and further trying to find an exit to this mysterious white place, but it felt like an endless maze. I looked around for a button or signs out but to no avail. I started to run forward with hope that was breaking away with every step I took. I almost lost hope altogether until I saw the silhouette of a woman. I stepped slowly, carefully.

"Hello? Are you stuck here too?" I said softly. As I walked closer to the woman I saw who she was.

Her red hair was braid back into a bun, on her head rested a beautiful crown. She wore a mantel over her golden gown. However, the mantel did not overshadow the beauty of her gown but rather enhanced it.

The mantel was lined with fur and the inside was made of beautiful red silk material designed in a beautiful, intricate pattern. The mantel also made her appear as a power authority, almost as if she could make anyone fall on their knees in front of her.

Her gold gown made her look like a goddess. The gown had a simple off shoulder, and the waist was held with a white silk ribbon. If you looked closely you could see the intricate work put on the simple ribbon. The waist down was a beautiful work of gold net which made the dress look so much more majestic than it was. At the bottom of the gown were several butterfly shaped patterns, all of them were flying up. It was just...

Magnificent.

The woman turned around and her hazel eyes pierced mine. It was the woman who had led me back to the palace, it was the woman because of whom every night I wished I wasn't born, the woman for whom I am fighting: My Mother.

My Mother gracefully walked towards me, smiling softly as she lifted her hands to tuck away a loose lock back into my hair. Her hands were warm unlike her skin which was pale almost translucent.

She took my hand and sat me on a hard slab of white stone. We sat in silence, something which we used to do a lot. When I was small, unaware of my mother's need for silence, I would chat on and on about nonsense. My Mother controlled her annoyance about my chatterbox personality days until one day she couldn't take it anymore and shouted at me.

After that day I never talked to my Mother unless it was urgent. Whenever we had to go to a charity event my Mother became a Mother I always yearned for. She would talk to me softly, hold my hand and teach me how to do things without snapping at me. I never hated my Mother, I knew she had problems channeling her emotions which I dealt with too.

She had to face a lot of difficulty and complications during and after my birth; I was an underweight child. She did a lot for me, from feeding me boiled food, nourishing, and bathing me all with her own hand. This is a Mother's responsibility, but a queen's responsibility is also to look after her other children: her kingdom.

Somehow, my Mother did both and did not toss me over to the Nanny like other queens did.

I also blame myself for her death. If I was never born then my Mother would have lived happily. I always find myself wondering about the possibility of this scenario. I looked at the white room again and thought aloud,

'So what they showed in Harry Potter was true! My Mother is my Dumbledore and I am Harry Potter!' I heard my Mother's laughter echoing in the white room.

"I never seem to catch up on you and your Father's elite sense of humor." My Mother commented with a small smile adorning her lips.

After a few moments of silence my Mother spoke up again. "You still hold grudges." She said softly. "I don't hold grudges, I just remember facts." I replied back.

"Dear, don't fight for something that is already yours." My mother said thoughtfully. Unable to understand her, I asked what she meant.

"You are fighting for your crown rather than defending it. You already are the Queen, you don't need to prove yourself to your Father. Queens do not worry about anyone taking their crown away. Crowns are a gift from God, they are custom made. Your crown will never fit anyone else. Don't go on standing for everyone's expectation of being what they want. Be what you want."

I was astonished by my Mother's advice, it was true that all this week I have been walking on expectations that I had been trying to fulfill, all to make everyone happy. I looked down at my palms which were devoid of any scratches. I felt my Mother's hand on my shoulder, pulling me towards her. I leaned willingly, enjoying this comfort which I always yearned for during my childhood.

My Mother asked me about my life in the castle and I filled her in with everything, though I had a feeling that she knew everything already or even more.

"Dear, after listening to your tale, I can say two things. Firstly, what you see isn't the truth, there are many things that can remain hidden and never come out."

Again unable to understand what she was referring to, I asked her to explain more. My Mother thought for a while then suddenly a floating apple appeared in front of us. It was a ripe and red apple.

"You see this apple Giana? Snow white got handed one of them. She didn't know that the apple was poisonous until it was too late. In real life people are like this apple, you may think they are sweet, kind and loving, but you never know their true personality. Measure your steps carefully." My Mother explained to me. Once her explanation had finished, the apple disappeared.

I didn't feel scared from what my Mother had said, it made sense. I knew what I had to do. I didn't need to run around my Father, asking for my crown. I should have been indulging in the work already. I didn't need anyone's approval, all I needed to do is start working and gathering allies. For once I knew what I had to do.

"Second bit of advice, if you become the Queen, the parliament will ask you to marry a man. Now you can't 'Princess Diaries' this. You need to show the parliament about the Coledonian 4th law of the ruler's succession where the last rule states that both males and females have equal right of succession. Your great grandmother Mary did this for all the coming line of successors, but this rule has been hidden from the media. You don't need to marry a man to prove that you are capable of being a Queen. Your quality and intelligence is all you will need. My dear, never give up your crown to anybody. You are a Queen, think like a Queen. A Queen is not afraid to fail. Failure is another step to greatness. Don't be afraid to face discrimination, no one can hurt you because you are a diamond dear - they can't break you. Be the Queen for all those girls who are shut down in their houses." My mother concluded.

I felt stunned at all the meaning behind me being the queen of Coledonia. I was not only doing this for myself but for the coming generation so that no one looks down on women. So that everyone knows that we can do the work just fine or better. This was so much more than revenge, this was for all the women who deal with criticism for being who they are, this is for those women who tried to raise their voice but were shut down by society.

"Do I have a choice?" I asked, not really wanting to know the answer. "You have. As your mother I will be happy if you stay, but as Queen I will tell you to go and do what you are destined to do."

"Will I be able to talk to you ever again?" I questioned.

"Whenever you feel your heart is telling you something then know that it is me. I am a part of you and you can always find me here" Mother replied softly, pointing at my heart. I guess heaven makes you poetic.

After saying this my Mother hugged me. I felt my eyes drooping and I fell into another slumber.