Phenomena: Personalities and Individuality

Multiple Personality Syndrome:

Simply: It is said that it is a self preservation mechanism created by one in order to cope.

Half true.

A phenomenon when personalities from your previous selves clash with your current self. Though they possess no memories from their old life their personalities remain.

They are not created, rather they are remnants of previous existence, that should have been wiped but latched on to the soul like parasites, resurfaced for the coping.

So it is: A self preservation mechanism of the soul when the threshold of pain surpasses the norm of the current self. It tries to bring out personalities of previous selves that can either block or take the pain. Their actions from then on are nothing but an imprint of the old selves, though still a fading effect, etched into the core of said personality.

But the downside is the conflicting nature of these multiple personalities making it difficult to know which is the real you.

Unlike us, though the anguish and memories are there from all those personalities, the bar in place suppresses the personalities that become their own entity. Even so their voices are sometime clear, though I am still unsure of how or when they project them.

Nevertheless I doubt the bar is omnipotent to hold them back forever.

The good thing for us is that those personalities have an effect on our current selves. The rationality, the suppression of emotions, the ferociousness and more, everything making our current being somewhat numb to the new worlds we find ourselves.

I say somewhat because not all people with personalities have the pain imprinted in them, some look to the positives—if there is: not one conjured up in their minds—making their new selves rather sentimental to the things around them.

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Sub: Consciousness of personalities.

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Consciousness, is it the soul or the personality of a soul in a point in each lifetimes?

A soul carries experience in each lifetime, and like partition separates the consciousness which is the personalities that once existed. In a sense it is the same for those cleaned as they are striped of those experiences and made new.

The old personality is taken away and a new inputed, you will never be the same you.

Question: could the consciousnesses be merged? I’m not sure, harmonization is vital and still there would be conflict in finding which is the real you as memories, experiences and decisions contradict.

So far cohabitation of their personalities/consciousnesses within a single bother is only possible because of the bar in place.

… In theory merging personalities is a possibility, but only if one preferable consciousness dominates the other assimilating the experience into one. That said if the fight for dominance is not one favorable, either a wrong personality taking over or a backlash in which the bar is broken and all will be loose. The sheer amount of information the make the mind collapse…

Then again no matter how you think about it all of them are you since it is of you.

*Age four:

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End it all.

What’s the point of being alive?

You’ll start over again.

Happiness will so be in reach.

Where is the happiness in endless hell?

Die

Die, Everything is pointless

End it, I hurts so bad.

Kill them

Be your old self again

………

……

…

How many personalities are sounding in my head? A choir? Stadium? Coliseum? I don’t know. Too many to distinct a single one. Their voices like hands try to devour me.

At this age I’d had a bit more freedom as they don’t chain me up even if I’m locked in.

Today I find myself outside in the yard. Just like the years I started to walk, finding myself here—with the little freedom I get that is if I’m not locked in—-nothing in particular in mind just staring into the endless space, still in my out-outgrown rag a small kitchen knife in my hand. It sheen was dulled but it drew me in.

The voices. So loud…

The bar seems to have weakened. But why(?), the impact of the events in my now-life doesn’t affect me. So why are their voices even louder?

The knife slowly up pressed to my neck.

Kill myself.

I don’t see the need. It not like I haven’t done so in a few of my lifetimes. All this will happen again. Not the same situations I face but I would be carried into another life to face even more torment. The situation now hasn’t had much of an effect on me, to push me to do that. If I did kill myself it be better to have done so repeatedly and endlessly to avoid having to live longer in those lifetimes. That said in itself is another hell, torment and hustle so I’d rather go with the flow of lifetimes and when my time comes yet again I will take it. It’s more like a delay to going into another life.

If only I could stay in the threshold forever, better yet my being disappear altogether.

Pointless.

Slowly lower knife.

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Abnormality: Possession, multiple personalities

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There is another theory to the phenomena. As I am not sure of what exactly it is that makes it happen this is but a guess.

The body; being able to interpret the experience etch into the soul is the main factor to this.

Not all souls make it into the threshold, for reasons, unknown.

If a soul (evil or not) manages to integrate itself into a body (one already with a soul), the phenomena can happen (what we call possession). Though the chances on retaining its memories a slim, a factor I am yet uncertain of, but to take a guess the body is not able to process that information and it’s trapped within itself.

Then comes the problem. Each of the soul have their personalities and that pushes them in a fight for dominance over the hosting body. The clash could affect the central processor of the host, the brain, as it is tossed between the personalities’ informations and thought processes at a rate it can’t keep up. And the result is the slow deterioration of the host.

It hasn’t happened to me before but if it does I’m certain the bar will either eliminate or isolate it as it not one of my personas.

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Construct: Physical and Ethereal

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The soul is no more than a culmination of experience and memories.

And the body, one that is possessed by memories and experience. An interpreter of some sorts, to put it. So it stands to reason that being wiped clean before descending might be the best choice. Putting aside the clashing of personalities, there is also the failure that comes along with it.

The body is but a husk, a vessel to hold a soul. So how does our kind do it? How do we have every memory and experience packed into a single physical form without truly being conflicted, even with the bar in place, drowning into the depths of insanity from the voices?

I have no answer to that…

But the only thing I can think a plausible conclusion is there has to be a similarity between all those selves—a wave length of some sorts, or maybe the factor is the soul itself. I can’t say it’s true because there are times even I can’t tell which is the real me. So there maybe a bar on us that keeps them in check only letting out little at a time, at convenience… Possible act of assimilation.

Well, why consider ‘wavelengths’ when they are you. That will be more of a concept for two different souls residing in one body for them to reside in the hosting body harmoniously.

Then again there is that possibility: two separate souls residing in one body, fighting for dominance over the other: Possession, achieving that very familiar effect. That is if the souls had not been into the threshold or that the shuffle might have ended them into the same being.

On a side; there is also one yet understood. There’s possibility of a soul been split—partitioned into separate bodies. There maybe a case of resonance with each other.

——Something for future thought.

As of yet I have not proved the existence of the ones called gods. A higher being may exist, probably, even if you count the few lifetimes I had been in those religious organisations. But the mechanics of the world I have seen as of yet make the possibility low. I have no idea how our existence came about, the world, the animals and so on. But I know to halt the infinite thought loop of these question, the Ideal being has created.

As of yet the only fact I see is all events called ‘divine providence’ is nature giving to us.

And yet the existence of the supernatural beings: demons and spirit like borns… could they be evolution of souls to a higher state of awareness(?). Absorbing the ‘emotions’ permeating around and given life through it. Tearing themselves away from the cycle and staying in that state, creating unexplainable phenomena?