THE CAT

I always suspected it was the devil himself. Because of that first accidental encounter in the alley, where I saw him in the messy situation he found himself in. It's not every day we see a cat tearing a man's throat out like that, as I saw it. It was a big cat, bigger than anyone else. But the appearance was that of a house cat, common indeed. I took care not to be seen, but an oversight made me drop a beer can from the garbage pile as I backed up and that was it. Those bright, lively eyes went right up to me and I couldn't do anything. I tried to run, but the animal was fast, I saw its shadow moving along the walls and I couldn't find it, it was always ahead.

I let him follow me home, what could I do? It was a white cat, with yellow eyes and always kept its distance, staring at me from a distance, suspicious. You must think I'm crazy to let the cat stay at home, after what I saw him do in the alley. And I don't even understand what got into me. I got attached to the animal and besides it didn't bother me. He showed up when he wanted, spent days, weeks away. I even missed it at times.

But that was before that night. I was sitting watching TV. It was 3 o'clock in the morning on Saturday, via an old movie, I think it was O Monstro da Lagoa Negra, that's it. When I started to hear a noise at the window, a knocking, it was getting louder and more frequent until I went to see. When I opened it, I came face to face with the cat. It was all bloody and had leaves and branches stuck to it. And strangely I didn't think the blood was his. At first I should be worried, I don't know. But that wasn't what crossed my mind, it was those damn eyes. Eyes wide and irritating. Cats didn't have that look, it was the look of a man, of someone who stares at you, challenges you, wants you to fight back. It brushed against me, went around the living room table, then jumped over it then took a bite of a green apple that was in the fruit bowl and then looked at me and said:

-My dear, Hank. Foolish young man who has not had many experiences in his life. You won't even be able to say that you were the first to see a cat speak, in this case this cat. The cat itself. King of cats. But he was the first nosy who saw me accidentally. So, been thinking all this time about how this would end. Because you know what you saw. He knows it wasn't a vision, nor was he crazy.

-Your thing, listen. I don't care what I was doing. Who would I speak to and who would believe? Cats don't go around slitting beggars' throats in the streets.

- Said the expert on cats. It's ok. I'm not here to discuss cat behavior with you. The cat was now strolling across the sofa, next to me. That long tail stretching straight as it stretched, digging its nails into the upholstery. He made fun of me, I'm quite sure of that.

-What do you want then? It can only have come from hell to take my soul away. Where was my mind when I let you follow me? I still took care, gave food, left it here at home.

-If you feel better, I would say that you would have no other option. This was destined to happen. Do you believe in Hank's dear fate?

-I didn't believe cats talked. What can I say now that I'm talking to one? I think so, I believe in destiny.

-I'll tell you what you have to do and also the advantages that our business will bring you. If you do exactly what I'm saying you will succeed and I will be able to fulfill my destiny on this earth. It's the following: -The cat told me everything and I did exactly as he said. I opened my restaurant, which opened on July 4, 1987. Don't ask me how, but the pussy banked everything. I, of course, was convinced that the animal was Satan and that I was now indebted, damning my soul and not caring.

Even knowing that the main ingredient on the menu was made with selected human meat. It worked that way. He picked people randomly on the street. He followed his normal routine. Supermarket, they took care of the food, the body and made reports. Those who fit the profile were chosen. Here came a second stage. I made contact with them. I enrolled in the gym that the person attended, bumped into bookstores, the bakery, casually, and then I started the ritual. With women there was even flirtation. I wasn't going to waste the chance. Even though he knew he would have to kill her later. It was for the restaurant. Its flesh would not rot and serve as food for worms, but it would have a nobler end. It would feed human beings. Of course, death had to be as natural as possible. So it was suffocation, poisoning or even lethal injections.

First you skin them, take off all the skin. This is the hardest part. Human skin is hard to come off, but the demonic cat taught me how to do it right. Then you cut off your head, feet, hands, you won't need them and then your viscera and lungs won't do any good either. Here comes the horn. I start with the forearms, they're cut in two lengths lengthwise, they're nice chunks and the arms, triceps, biceps; deltoids, trapezius, dorsal, lumbar, biceps, abdominals, cuadriceps. The human musculature, like the bovine one, is well defined, so it is easy to know the parts for the cut. But the preparation is something that requires a good experience. Human flesh seems to have no taste, so it has to be seasoned overnight and marinated. Use meat tenderizer and season with salt, pepper and cumin, onion and garlic and leave in a sizable, covered bowl. Then season it with rosemary and sage and that's it, just cook. I don't recommend frying the meat, I don't know why, but it doesn't taste very good. The best preparation is even roasted.

In these 6 months the restaurant has been open, more than 8 thousand dishes have already been served. The venture is a success and my friends, it has not been easy to keep up with the demand. I couldn't keep killing people anymore. In addition, there were sanitary inspections and several people I had to get my hands wet to get my hands on and make the business legal with meat distributors and slaughterhouses, you know?

But how to continue killing these people, with the rigor that our process demanded at the speed at which the restaurant was growing? Recruiting more killers. And that's what we did. In the beginning everything flowed in the best way. But then we started to notice that the bodies started to appear with perforations and deformations, which made us waste time and money, as we had to kill more people and cremate the bodies that could no longer be used for slaughter. It wasn't until Arok the cat started overseeing the slaughter that the whole thing settled down. It's not easy. We didn't even know that the thing was going to take on that proportion. At least I didn't know, but Arok, I think he did, the rogue.

One night in 1990, it had been 3 years since we opened. We serve a Thai family. I noticed that from the beginning they were suspicious of me, the restaurant, everything. When the dishes arrived and the girl, whose name was Letícia, I knew because that was what her younger sister called her when they were fighting, she started to eat, she screamed and dragged her chair away. It said: -How disgusting, how disgusting! That it! There was a nail on her plate. So far so good, I could argue that it belonged to one of the cooks. But the worst came later. What they asked for was soup and there was the target of the young woman's fierce disapproval, it was not a simple fingernail but a human eyeball floating in the soup. Ai couldn't say that it was the cook's lax. It was a scandal. The restaurant was closed, of course, and we had to explain. We hired a good lawyer who argued that one of the slaughterhouses that supposedly sold us the meat had delayed sanitary inspections and, as it was later investigated, its slaughter methods were below expectations in terms of quality. We pay a stratospheric fine. But we managed to get away. We just couldn't continue with the restaurant.

I went to Spain with the cat. Zaragoza was a good place to live. Live well, as we wanted. As for our restaurant plan, good. It wasn't exactly what we wanted, but we did it. It worked for a while. Akura took me to a restaurant on a Sunday afternoon because he wanted me to try the food.

-What do you think?

-It's divine. Wonderful. I've never tasted anything like it.

-So, smart. Because this was my first customer. The restaurant opened in 1309 and still exists today. Godofredo, the man who founded it, was smarter than you and believe me, he never needed help while he was alive. It was responsible for the deaths of more than 600 people and was never discovered. Each place was given a name. In London he became known as Jack the Ripper. In Hungary he was responsible for some deaths attributed to Isabel Bathory. In Germany, Fritz Haarmann, the Hanover vampire, was also blamed for some of the murders of Godfrey.

-And how did this Godofredo manage to live so long? Isabel Bathory and Fritz Haarmann are more than three hundred years apart in history's timeline. How is this possible?

-Good afternoon sirs. What will you want? -I looked up, scared and looked at me an old man, decayed, with a pompous mustache and bald. Decrepit. It made me want to just look at him.

"Look at Godofredo," said the cat to my astonishment. -Prepare the flagship of the house, the one that only you know how to do. Remember?

-Anything for my lord. And to drink?

-A Cabernet Sauvignon would be nice, thanks. You know I was just here explaining to this bastard, some bastard that in my desperate attempt to find you a replacement, I owned one of the most respected restaurants in America, as you did to be so good at your job. Do you believe that in 3 years you managed to go bankrupt with your business? Well, there are people who are not really good at business. What do you say, a year of apprentice here with you, do you think you can work it out?

-Yeah, I'm old my Lord. And I think the extra years you gave me are already slipping away.

-I'll give him an extra two hundred years if you teach this one. What I need is rest and if I don't find anyone I will have to leave the office and tell my master that I failed. As a wizard I cannot afford to fail. You know, don't you?

-Yea. I will see what I can. But looking at it like that, did you make a good choice? Doesn't seem like the type for this particular service.

- That's what I have left, my dear. I can't risk too much in this kind of business. Let's see where it goes. What is bringing us? Is it veal? It smells great.

-Perfectly sir. Specially chosen for you. They are French, pure. 8, 10 and 12 years old. All sisters. All have a seal and stamp. I know exactly who they are. Although by the smell I recognize them. You'll like it very much, sir. I knew I would come back one day. Enjoy your dinner.