**Within My Shell**

Life can be a monotonous cycle—I know this because I'm living it. It's a relentless journey of hard work and pain, where one must wear a facade, concealing their true self. The world demands self-awareness, a constant reminder I experience daily. Grinding skills becomes a necessity, an endless repetition that feels like treading water. And then there's the discomfort of enduring judgmental stares and conforming behavior, a stark contrast to the freedom I once had at home.

It's been merely a week since I started my job, and already, I find myself yearning for the carefree life I left behind. Happiness seems elusive, leaving me torn between conflicting emotions. But this brief period of time has taught me invaluable lessons.

I've come to realize that a shell can be a shield—a protection of sorts. But what kind of protection? That's for each person to decide individually.

Is it a shell of pain? A way to shield ourselves from the wounds inflicted by the outside world? Or perhaps it's a shell of stares? A means to protect ourselves from the prying eyes and judgmental glances?

Outside my shell lies everything—every kind of pain and every kind of pleasure. It's a world filled with unpredictable experiences. Yet, inside my shell, there exists pain and pleasure, but of a kind that is acceptable to me. It's familiar, manageable, and ultimately, my own.

The question remains: am I truly happy?

Maybe the answer is yes, or maybe it's no. Happiness, like life, is a complex and ever-changing entity. And as I continue to live within my shell, navigating the trials and tribulations of existence, I come to understand the intricate nature of the world.

Life persists, unforgiving and demanding. But I, with my shell as a companion, endeavor to find my own path—a delicate balance between self-preservation and authentic expression.