The Fallout

#Chapter6 The Fallout

Silence befalls the room as his biting tone echoes in the air, although I swear, I hear the most subtle of growls come from Colton's way, so close beside me and make sure I don't look at him. Instead I stare at my hands in my lap and pray for this to be over. Shaking internally and genuinely fearful for my life. Never have I actually wanted to be left to go back to the orphanage to spend time in my room with Vanka, but now it's so calling to me.

I don't want anything as much as I want that right now, well except maybe this weird primal urge for the guy at my left to calm down a bit and stop plaguing me. I can feel him, overly so. Way too in tune and aware of him, even if he is three feet away. My body and mind are doing some weird things in relation to him and as terrified as I should be right now, I don't feel it when he moves closer and somehow calms me without even looking my way. One backwards step of maybe a foot and he soothes my nerves back into warm gooey submission, that inner heat spreading as he gets close enough that his scent sparks some internal fire in me.

/"Then your son will die too, and we lose our future leader. You cannot break the bond without severe consequences. The choice has been made. Fate has chosen for him and you must obey./" The Shaman comes back, undeterred by Juan's anger and stands as though to press the point. He's low toned and confident in his wisdom and does not seem intimidated in any way. /"He can choose to sever the bond if he wishes, but history has shown us that mates who do… both die! The only other option is denial to consummate. They choose to walk away, no mark is made, no union at all, and deny the bond completely. It will never die, and they will live lives craving what the other can give them, no matter who they end up with. IS that what you want for your son?/"

All eyes turn on Juan, so much tension in this room as the elders internally talk so that I cannot hear them. Colton paces and I can tell he too is privy to what is being said. They are his pack after all, and two are his blood. Father and Uncle. He doesn't seem happy and the waves of his anger are all lapping over me and affecting my own sanity. Dampening the heat, replacing it with his rage.

I can't take it anymore, as minutes tick by and my nerves fray to the point I feel like I may scream, some internal burst of nervous crazy wooshes out.

/"I'll leave. I don't want this either./" I blurt it out, into the deathly silence as hysteria gets the best of me and literally every single face turns to me in shocked response like they suddenly remembered I was here in this corner.

I know I just spoke out of turn and disrespected everyone in this room, but I'm sat here wearing my own dried blood, shredded emotions and exhaustion pushing through. My heads a mess, and in the space of thirty minutes I discovered that being a virgin doesn't mean you cannot get crazy urges to strip naked and jump someone's bones, even if that someone you previously avoided like the plague. I've pictured him naked at least twice without even meaning too since he gave me every intimate one of his memories and some of those are him showering.

What?

/"What?/"

Both Colton in my head and his dad verbally, in unison and I panic that I just spat this out loud.

/"It was the plan, my intentions. I mean after my … the um, tonight. My turning. I was leaving. Going away and it doesn't have to change./" I sound insane. Babbling like a fool with verbal diarrhea and aware of the way all eyes are eating up my weak presentation of my crap contribution. I should have just run when I had the chance and screwed the running ceremony.

/"That won't break the bond. We'll still be connected, still linked. It will just make us miserable. Don't you see? What happened tonight, it changed everything, for both of us./" Colton sounds deflated and I get the visual of him and Carmen together kissing, right from his head to mine and have to shake it away as insane jealously claws at my insides from out of nowhere, proving his point. Irrational, illogical but there it is, and he didn't even mean to project his sad thoughts about her my way.

/"Then what? Because all I am hearing is hopeless submission or death!/" My anger snaps, and out of somewhere deep inside, my bravado peaks and pushes me to my feet, voice strong and frustration seeping through. An inner surge of tingling electricity as my emotions peek and Colton looks at me in a very odd way. Suddenly stopping and staring insanely into my eyes while furrowing his brow dramatically, screwing up that cute face.

/"They're not amber/" he comes out with the most random reply and I blanche at him like he has two heads and no idea what he's talking about.

/"What?/" I stammer as he paces towards me.

/"Your eyes… when your inner wolf peeks. They're not amber. They're red. No one has red…. we all have amber./" He stalks towards me, grabbing my hand and spins me to him so he can inspect me closely. /"Show me/" He urges, and I gawp at him in bewilderment. Confused at the side—tracking of this conversation and feeling like I just fell through a reality hole.

If I knew how to do it on command, then I would, but as I only transformed for the first time and have no idea how to call my inner wolf into my eyes again, I just stare at him, completely dumbfounded with the importance of a color.