Unexpected Pain

How dare he!

Coward.

Fool.

How dare he to do this me. Steal yet another thing from me.

After everything he'd done to me, his only child. Man's cruelty truly does know no bounds. My fathers cruelty followed me into my immortal life as it had in my human one.

The man had once again found a way stab me in the back, and twist the knife in even further.

In mere seconds the ground had shifted beneath my feet, all my newly acquired power and superhuman strength failed me. I found myself frozen on the floor, fists clenched and stunned to silence staring up at my father in muted horror and something akin to total frustration as he swayed gently in the air.

He'd hung himself. Like he'd hung me.

The most God fearing man I knew killed himself.

I couldn't even bring myself to laugh that the irony. He must have thought it was so poetic to kill his child then himself the exact same way. The man must have been sick in the head.

A gaping hole seems to have opened up in my chest, no emotion passed beyond, as soon as any feeling blinked to life, that hole swallowed it.

Killed my feelings, made them nothing lifeless much like my father here. Much like myself.

I'd found strength in my rageand my pain it's what fuelled my bloodlust, and that is what kept alive now all my emotions seem to have been eaten up by this hole in the centre of my being.

What was I supposed to do now? This numbness I knew would not last forever and I could not seem to swallow the scene me, even as my new sight took it all in with prefect clarity. I could not bring myself to accept this.

He'd killed himself? Why? Why would he do something like this?

Something that was sure to send him right to hell. I had so many questions. I wanted to know why he did this to me?

Why he betrayed me? Sided with the corrupt Mayor and the town council hungry for blood and gossip. Why he a man of the law stood by and did nothing to help me?

Why he killed me?

Now I'll never know. He'd robbed me of that truth as he'd robbed me of my life.

I suddenly felt like I was drowning, my lungs pulled tight, caught fire and my chest heaved as a sob clawed itself out of my chest and like the collapse of a great big dam, I wept.

And wept. And wept.

I couldn't understand how this could hurt me, how my fathers death could cause me such sorrow. I'd come here to kill him and my mother, to right the many great wrongs they had committed against me. I thought I'd let go of the weak human girl, that I'd changed and become something new and someone powerful.

A creature unchallenged.

A woman unrivalled.

I was to right this wrong and move on, having abandoned the mortal girl I'd once been and continue on as the immortal being Scarlet Grey.

Yet I felt none of my unrivalled strength now. I was back to being a broken child crying on the floor of my fathers library, weeping for a man who did not deserve my tears.

How I hate this man.

How I hate what his choices had me become.

And, if I am honest. Really honest with myself I missed him, the man who raised me.

The man who read to me every night, the one I'd follow around all day and the father who'd take me fishing with him. The father I could trust to love me and protect me from any and all harm.

How I miss my papa.