Cradle of Love: C2-3

Chapter 2:

I was so lost in my thoughts that I had forgotten my reasons for landing in the guest room. This had been my life for the past four days, phasing in and out of a reality I had no control over.

A reality I should have made peace with.

A reality that I should not have even chosen in the first place, but like they always say, man is to error, but my error cost me, and I was ready to pay the price.

The question here was how long I would keep doing this.

I wanted her.

I yearned for her.

I longed for her.

Every bit of me was dragging me to her, but even I was not that stupid to just rush in after screwing up.

I needed her though. I only wish she could look at me with eyes full of love like the first time.

I was okay with that. She had every reason to be angry at me, and maybe after today, she would send a small smile at me.

I was that desperate.

I had also lost track of time somewhere between my thoughts and the world I was trapped in along with emotions that I needed to let out. Emotions that needed to be expressed, but even heaven knows my words would not be enough to express my agony, my desperation, and longing for the woman of my life.

The woman who I'd blindly go to war for.

The woman I'd shamelessly die for.

I only snapped out of my trance when I heard someone clear their voice behind me. I froze because this was not what I expected. And someone finding me in this room was going to be like a slap in the face and all my efforts would be useless, especially if that person was my beautiful woman.

In simple terms, I was screwed for the hundredth time in just four days.

Oh, how I prayed it was not Lia because somehow, I was so sure she would smash my face out of extreme anger. I wouldn't complain but that was not what I wanted from her, I wanted her forgiveness and I was committed to earning it; even, if it took me years, which I hoped, wouldn't be the case.

Luckily for me, it was my best friend, Ryan. We had been best friends since diaper days and he also knew what my troubles were. But this time he was shocked to find me in Lia's room rummaging through her stuff.

I knew it was quite awkward considering the tension that had been growing in this house, but him being here and now was raising more questions than me being in Lia's room. I looked at him wearing the same confused face as his.

He was supposed to be in Mauritius finding a way to pay off the debts we both had. We had been so lost in life that we had debts to pay like we were paying for every gallon of air that we took in, but that would come later after I cleaned up the guestroom.

"hey bro, whatcha doin' here? Lia will have my head if she realizes I knew you went through her stuff." Ryan greeted.

For someone who had been away for some while, this mofo was updated about the recent events, but then there was no way he wouldn't considering him, and miss beautiful would always gang up on me at times.

"Naah, what she don't know won't hurt her man. I know I screwed up with that blonde chick but I didn't expect a whole essay about that night here."

I knew justifying myself wasn't going to do me any good, but a man's gotta try, even if it's the last thing he does. That was my mantra.

"seriously dude, that's what you worried about right now?" he snickered.

"I don't know what to do to pacify her man." I really didn't know what to do. I had tried everything that she liked. I even cooked, after hours of studying stupid recipes, but she still left me with my food. I had worked my ass off the past four days that if this would pay our debts, I think we would be free, very free. But hey, this is us and this is me.

"if I were you, I'd clean this room and get out before she comes home. If she finds you here, it will be a different story altogether."

"you right man, help me clear up." I pleaded with him, only to watch him on his heels to the kitchen. Sometimes I wonder where I got him. But he was right, Lia would not be pleased to find me in the guestroom, that too going through her stuff.

I bet she wouldn't forgive me for a month, but I wasn't going to wait here and learn the hard way. I had to hurry since it was almost four o'clock and she'd be here anytime now.

"not today bro, you in this alone, and besides I feel hungry. You still have that weird bacon?" this little shit.

"only you can leave a dying man to his fate for food."

"hahaha really funny, anyway I'll be in the kitchen when you done." unbelievable. I definitely needed new friends.

Forty-five minutes later, my brain was fried with the amount of work it had done. My body felt like I'd been exercising for months without a break. I was tired, now I understood why the maids could request for breaks and even the janitors. I was never denying them a raise in salaries if they ever requested.

This kind of work was hell, thank heavens I was done. Damn.

As I finished, I heard the front door creak open. She was here.

The beautiful one was here and I had just finished cleaning up.

She was here and I was yet to change, but maybe staying like this wasn't so bad, after all, she could see my efforts.

Maybe then she would stop looking at me with angry eyes. Well, I have to admit I was always turned on when she was angry, but even the little man knew not to be excited when there was a chance we wouldn't even make it through the day.

She was here already and I was anxious. Maybe she could finally talk to me.

Just maybe.

The smell of bacon had me almost waltzing into the kitchen. Literally. If you were me, you probably would've done the same.

As I neared the kitchen, I heard Lia and Ryan making a conversation and laughing. That knucklehead knew how to make Lia laugh but could not be of help to me when I was desperate, but at least she was laughing.

I know it's wrong to eavesdrop but I could not help it. So I listened to her talk of her day and how happy she was.

"so lee, how was your day?"

"twas good grandpa." she laughed and I struggled to hold a laugh at that.

Ryan hated it when Lia called him grandpa but if it would cheer her up, he would not object and I was thankful for him. I watched them bicker on and off and chase each other around the kitchen then to the living room.

Ha, this meant the bacon was still untouched and that I could sneak in and steal some. Heaven knows Ryan would never let me eat his bacon despite calling them weird. And they were sweet, really sweet.

I was still anxious but also excited as I mischievously devoured the bacon. Damn, yuummmy. I was onto the last piece when I heard Ryan shout at me.

"you sick son of a hoot, no sorry aunty. You stupid one-legged bacon stealer I'm going to feed you to the crocodiles in the Mississippi and send the crocodile to a faraway land nobody will find your remains!!!!"

Oh god, that same lame attempt at insulting me again. I doubt there were even crocodiles in that river. I found myself laughing so hard that I had to drink some water. It was impossible not to really. But first I had to think of a way to get out of here, alive.

"forgive me today lee but I'mma kill your old ugly and big-headed boyfriend. And can I just sell his witty self already?!!."

Okay so now I was in trouble. And I could not use Lia as my shield. So I ran or better yet attempted to before tripping and falling so hard on my butt it hurt.

"don't worry grandpa, you could put him up for sale on eBay." she laughed. Seriously this woman will be the death of me if only I knew.

"oh god, my butt hurt!" I cried as I tried getting up.

"serves you right for stealing my bacon."

"Why do I even keep stealing your food?" I mumbled as a sad memory crossed my mind.

The last time I attempted such, I ended up knocking my foot on the staircase and head on the wall before bouncing back to the floor. My life as a thief in this house was getting harder every day but I was not about to give up stealing Ryan's food.

The guy could be the best chef if he wanted to. Instead, he enjoyed kicking my ass for stealing. I was brought back to reality when I heard cameras clicking.

Great, just fvcking great. This shameless duo just had to capture my not so pleasant memories.

I huffed angrily and stormed to the shower, after stealing the last piece and of course smiling to myself. Hey, that's the payment for my hurting butt.

Despite having so much fun, one thing was sure though.

I had to face my woman, beg for her forgiveness till she forgave me, but until then, I would keep trying to pacify her with everything I had, every bit of me. I thought to myself as the cold water ran down my back the many ways I could.

*****

Chapter 3

It was just a matter of time before my past and present caught up to us and I just wanted everything to be okay before that as it would be very hard focusing on my problems with her mad at me. I lived a life that could end at any moment. it was like my next breath was determined by an unknown force, but such was the life people like me lived. it was ruthless, insane, cold, the kind of life that beautiful souls like my beautiful woman had no business knowing. I don't really now what it was that scared the hell out of me.

The probability that my woman would come to know that I lived a double life, or the fact that she would be dragged into a battle she had no way out of. I was scared that she would hate me if she really knew who I was and I could not have that happen, not at this point in time when all I wanted to breathe was her. When all I wanted to try out over and again was her.

I needed her.

She was everything to me and without her, it was more than clear that my life could take a horrible new turn, one I was never ready for. It never really mattered but what I hated was the ghosts from my past coming to haunt my present. I knew there would come such a day, but until then, I was willing to play Nintendo with all of them.

I knew that someday I may be forced to make a choice between leaving her and saving her, heaven knows I would always choose saving her. I would save her each and every time I f I had to. I had gotten used to being her white knight and I was not going to stop being that for her. If I had to ear the white hat for everything to be in order, for her to be safe, if I had to even be the villain in her story for her to be safe, then I would, without a second thought.

And I would spend the rest of my life asking for her forgiveness. I was sure that choice was better than completely losing her. She was my lifeline. She is my lifeline. She is me just as I her, I hope she would understand when the time came for me to leave her. When the circumstances had me optionless, I really hoped she would understand, but today I was not leaving, and I was sure tomorrow I was still not leaving.

However, the future would always remain unknown to everyone. Maybe if I had to leave her, I wanted it to be on good terms but for now Ryan and I had to pretend to have a normal life. We did not want her involved in whatever was going on with the both of us. That was the best thing for everyone. I had a diamond that I would keep safe at all time.

I would do that, always.

Just her, only for her, my woman.

I knew and know I am not worth her tears, I just wanted her back in my arms. Even if it meant doing everything she asked of me including doing her stupid routines with her. I had to think of something and think fast. Anything for her. Memories of how we met flooded my mind as I thought of everything in the past six months of my life.

Six months ago my company, Garner Stats was on the verge of being bankrupt and in just a few months, I would have to close the company and send my thousands of employees home. It was not a choice I would ever make willingly and maybe I would never have to make such a choice, ever. I never wanted to do that, not even in y wildest dreams, but then that time, for the first time in so long, I had lost hope.

I had given up and for a moment there I never cared what would happen to my people, to my family, to everyone who so much as cared about me. I was in my world, a world that I would always regret going to. I had dragged a lot of people down that time and I would always regret that. If it had not been for Ryan, I would never have gotten back up.

Ryan, being my second in command, had brought me the quarterly reports and they were not pleasant at all. Nothing was good. The graphs were all going down and most of the investors had started thinking of other firms to invest in. The family business was going down and if I did not act fast, I would have a thirty storey building with several departments empty.

It would just be another building in the city and I would have been the reason for the fail. That would have been my fault. I would have been the downfall of my company, an organization I had worked so hard to maintain after papa ad left in our care. I would have disappointed him and that would have broken him more than it could have me. I had neglected my work over the last few months and despite Ryan's persuasion, I ignored them.

Nothing made sense to me and I was okay that way. I was drowning in depression, I was drowning in my obsession of a woman who never cared enough to give me her attention. I was drowning in a whole that had long been dug, one that was always there and waiting for me and I was just too dense to notice.

So, in love that I ignored all the red alerts.

So happy that I was ready to go over the cliff with someone who never gave a damn about what would happen to me and mine, a fate that would haunt me, forever. It is sad what a broken heart can do to a person's brain and how it affects everyone around the person. I had fallen so deeply in love with Reyna, the she-devil herself.

For the two years we had dated, I gave her everything including my sanity and ways of thinking. She had meant the world to me. I treated her like the princess she had wished to be, spoiled her to the extent that mama began complaining. But I was already in too deep and there was no way out for me. Reyna claimed love, but being the man that never knew what love felt like, I accepted.

All I saw was her. In the shower, in my meetings she occupied my mind. She was etched into my subconscious, she was a part of me. Reyna was not just any girl, she was my obsession. I lived for her, just as I would have died for her. I was always at her beck and call and even became like a puppet to her. I was a puppet in love, and I was not complaining.

I gave her family the good life and even helped her with her work. I used my connections to make her happy. And happy she was, just not with me. I spoiled her but she maxed out my credit cards playing dress up for the boss of her company. Her boss was one of the investors in my company, lucky me. I only came to realize this when she attended one of the meetings with her boss, and he introduced her as his fiancé.

To say I was shocked was an understatement. All I saw was red but I had to continue the meeting pretending nothing was wrong. I had to text Lexi, my twin, so she would take over the meeting. She reluctantly chipped in but not before telling me I had lots of explaining to do. If only she knew what was going through my mind, she would have understood.

After that incident, I grew lazy and despite Lexi and Ryan's efforts I still lost interest in everything. Lexi would warn me each morning, make me wake up but as soon as she left, I would go drink my life away. She grew tired of pestering me and of taking over the company while I was away. It was only when she threatened to sell all her shares to Reyna's company that I made efforts to get better after four months of wasting away.

I knew she was serious because Lexi never had interests in the company, all she ever wanted to do was live her life. I went to rehab, actually, she dragged me into rehab and after three months I was well. I was back to normal but my company was on its way down and it would soon be wiped off the face of the earth, just another company in the history books.

I was on a mission to get my company up and all the other options I had sought did not work. There was one last option, the only option that would make my company come back to life. Seeking help from Jay. Jay was the guy who had solutions to critical problems. Nobody ever really saw him except for his closest circle, but that did not matter. I really needed his help.

Ryan and I went to some of his guys for help and we got what we needed. He gave us a seventy-five-million-dollar loan. The company later on came back to life despite the hefty price that my bestfriend and I had to pay. Days after recovering the company, we went out for drinks along with Lexi and her lustfully hot girlfriend, Mia.

As the drinks kept coming, I excused myself to the washrooms. I was almost useless but it was a night of celebration, besides we had the drivers waiting for us for when we decided to head home.

Then I saw her, the most tempting woman of the night, but she was not alone.