Chapter 8. Mesalla

"He's your.....mate?" Joseph hesitated emphasising on the word mate.

"You can't tell a soul Joseph. No one in the pack must know about this. Please?" I said ignoring his statement.

"Why not?" He asked seeming dumbfounded by my suggestion. "You need your mate. Not just on a personal front, but to help build our pack. It's the one thing your father lacked. That is in fact something our whole pack has suffered for four generations. We can't repeat the trend Arlene." He said in a stressful tone.

I had thought about it all. How they would all associate Roman's pack with ours, how much bigger it would have gotten and how much powerful we would become. We would make a pack no one out there intended to have trouble with. But that didn't matter to me.

"This is exactly what I knew would happen. That all of you would get past him killing father and just accept him." I said this time tears clouding and flowing from my eyes.

"I am not excusing his act ma." He said trying to justify his words earlier, yet making it worse by adding a but thus nullifying what he just said. "but you know our history sweetheart. As a pack, we seem to carry that one misfortune. Your father had the chance to change it, but look at where he ended up."

I stayed quiet.

"We need this. We really do." He went on with a frown.

I was crying now. Uncontrollably.

"I am not defending him sweetheart, I swear." He attempted to justify himself some more. "But you were there, and last I checked, Roman had a lot of respect for your father. He must have acted out to protect his people, which I know on any given chance you would too.

And from what I see, if Nali tried to cause commotion, She did one hell of a job. Much more than she would imagine herself." He finished.

Our pack history was very strange. We had alpha and beta families that almost never found their mates for generations. Sometimes, this happened at a much later stage in their lives, when they were old and tired. It was what we called the Mate curse.

Our pack had always been vulnerable because of it. But I didn't think it was that important. The way I saw it, a mate was a lover and a friend and that didn't make me believe it would help make the pack better than it would be without mate bonds.

My father finding his mate, and me subsequently finding mine at the right age, almost seemed like the curse was breaking.

Joseph too was a victim of this curse. Except, he found his mate a few months earlier. He had been happily married to Mesalla's mother, Betty but then found his mate who is at the young age of eighteen. This has since put a strain on him and his family. He loved his wife from the time he met her, and now he was unsure about their relationship and whether to stay loyal to her or to be with his mate.

He had trusted me with this secret and it had been hard to see him suffer from it.

"Do you see her?" I asked knowing he would understand who I spoke of.

"Jane has been very understanding." He said thoughtfully.

"How so?" I asked curiously.

"She says she understands my position and is willling to give me all the time I need. I know now that you have a mate, some of this you can understand. I want to be with her, to share everything with her but its just....impossible."

I really didn't know what to say to him at this point. He was in a really tight spot and I could not tell if his or my situation was worse than the other.

"Does Mesalla know?"

"Of course not. I can't find the heart to tell him."

"We will avenge father's death. One way or the other. So quit trying Joseph. Just don't."

He gave a nod that was followed by "Yes Alpha."

Joseph left and at four in the afternoon Mesalla came by.

"I thought about it and I agree to the attack. I believe it is necessary and and we must go ahead with it. I am only hopeful that alpha Roman does not expect the attack because that will keep us at an advantage. Despite all that, I will appreciate being in the shadows and have you as the pack's beta take the lead." I instructed.

He was stunned by my last words. "You won't take part?"

"No." I replied. "I prefer to sit out. You can be ahead of the plans, keep me updated, and when you decide who exactly we should attack and what harm we intend to cause, let me know."

"Yes alpha. I will get straight to it then."

I was being a coward, I know. But the thought of fighting Roman didn't sit right with all of me. I would rather what would happen happens, and I didn't take a part. And I was glad Mesalla didn't persistently question it.

"Arlene?" Mesalla called out sofly disturbing my thoughts.

"Yes?" I replied curiously.

"I was wondering if you have a social life outside here. This house, the pack business and all?" He asked finally.

I laughed a little and he grinned at that.

"Well no." I responded. "But I would love a guide."

"I would love to take that up. What do you say we have dinner tonight?" He asked

"Gladly."

"Then I will see you at seven."

That night, I got dressed in a little black dress and a pair of sandal heels.

I never went out on dates much but I guess I needed to distract myself from everything. and I was glad Mesalla offered himself for that.

He got to my house at exactly seven and I loved what I saw. I guess this was a distraction enough.

"You look beautiful." He said warmly.

"You don't look so bad yourself." I said too.

We went to dinner and for the first time in months I freed myself with him around me. We talked, and laughed and talked again. It was so much fun.

The drive back to the house was quiet, but not awkward.

When we got to the house, he insisted to walk me in and I let him.

We were now both in the lounge where he stood in front of me motionlessly. I laughed. "What?"

"You're just beautiful. That's all." He said, looking more serious than I was.

He made me clumsy because right on, I dropped my purse and an attempt to pick it up and look back up found me having my face touching his. I felt an attraction, and it wasn't for him but here I was following it rather than pulling back from it.

Before I knew it, we kissed and without breaking away, he was asking entry by biting my lower lip softly.

I didn't pull back, instead our lips were gliding together the same way his tongue and mine were.

This felt right. All I had to do was imagine Roman's face and the sequence would be complete. I could not do it without his image in my head.

Within minutes. I was carried up the stairs and the rest of it was what would be history tomorrow.

The next morning, I opened my eyes to Mesalla's beautiful face. I guess calling him handsome didn't cut it. Looking right down his torso and to his hardened well built body, I realised he was gorgeous. If that was the case, then why was last night such a blur, I thought to myself.

"Why didn't you tell me?" He asked me just as I tried to move and was brought to a stop to how my body felt.

"Tell you what?" I asked feeling ashamed because I knew exactly what he was talking about.

"That you were new at this? A virgin?"

"Why does it matter to you?" I looked away.

"I don't know. Girls usually leave that for special people and I wouldn't exactly say I am that to you."

"Well I am not girls, I am me. And I am going to take a shower. I count on your discretion." I finished.

After a shower, and several thoughts of regret, I walked out of the bathroom.

Mesalla was waiting on me with the bed all made up.

"I will appreciate it if my father didn't know about this." He said sounding a little serious.

"I didn't plan to say a thing, but why do you say so?"

"Let's just say he has his won plans for my future. Especially if I don't find my mate." He answered quietly.

"You really should have faith. You just might find her you know." I said feeling bad that I had a mate that I didn't even want and here he was hopeless to meet his own.

"I don't count on it. But, I do count on your company." He now wore a sly smile. "And I mean this type of company." He walked towards me and planted an intense kiss on my lips.

Why I was doing this? I don't know. But the feeling of betraying Roman the only way I could gave me a satisfaction I could not describe.