Chapter 46

I woke up in bed of our house when the two are busy to make a soup for me. I sighed when I feel my baby kicking. Malaking pasasalamat na mahigpit ang kapit ni baby. I feel the pain in my arm, nadaplisan lang iyon.

The two boy's started to scold me but my mind is in him and his first love. It kills me but I didn't want to remember it now. Luckily, the enemy didn't kill me and my baby of I will regret this forever.

"I packed your things, you'll be in U.S for a year but don't worry. Kasama mo ako don while I'm still working in the organization. They won't track me there, I'll be a father temporarily while you're still need to heal and gave what you want. Some cravings, pain and etc." Mahabang sabi ni Hans nang biglaang hinanap na si France ng asawa nya.

"Hindi ako pwedeng mapagod." Sabi ko sa kanya na ikinailing nya.

"You're stubborn girl, sayo pa talaga nang galing? Paano kung mapahamak yung anak ninyo, what will you do? Miscarriage is not easy." Galit na sabi nya nang sinimulan nyang subuan ako ng chicken soup.

Good thing, hindi ako nasuka sa amoy niyon at nakailang ulit pa ako nang painumin nya ako ng tubig. "Do you want anything before we go?"

Hans had a chopper kaya hindi na namin kailangan kumuha ng ticket. "Don't worry, your pregnancy is healthy and earlier, I visit your OB. It's fine, don't be afraid, I'm the one who drive it. Hindi ko kayo hahayaang mapahamak na dalawa."

I still can't believe that one day, he will take care of me and be a responsibility. I am always get mad when he always suspicious about Lucas. He's right, after all, from the beginning but I am still involve of that planned. I still can't process any thing about his Family and First Love. I don't know when and when I will be immune of this pain, of this love. The love full of pain and the pain is always there. I'm not ready for all those pain because of my pregnancy.

We stayed in U.S in 4 months. Hans gave my cravings and I am happy with that. I appreciate him and his feelings for me when he confessed on my 7th month pregnancy. First, I am shocked and didn't know what to do. But we are still friend's and I also cut the connection except for Krisha who knew everything about his cousin.

We slept apart, and not in the same room. Ni hindi mo naranasan maging awkward kapag kasama sya dahil matagal ko na din syang kilala. He's always there when I'm breaking down, he's there when we buy clothes for the baby. My happiness is not a hundred percent. This is not my dream, not to Hans but to him. I want him to be with me, thru ups and downs but now I can't believe when I think about him, the pain is always still visible for me and it's not good for the baby.

In good news, the baby is healthy and I am happy with that. "Anong ipapangalan mo sa anak mo?" Sambit nya on the other day, kakaligo ko lang ulit in the evening.

Nag isip ako. "I still didn't know what will his name. Pag iisipan ko na lang siguro kapag nanganak na ako."

October is my due date on the 4th. And my tummy is so big now. Inilalayan ako ni Hans paupo ng kama ng hawakan nya ang tyan ko.

I feel the baby kicked when we laughed. I felt sting on my chest when I still remember him. Imagining this situation with him, ang mga ginagawa ni Hans ay dapat si Lucas. Iyon ang mas nagpapasakit ng isipan ko. I choose the positive side when I touched my big tummy.

"Blooming ang Mommy, We are excited to see you." Bulong nya na para bang maiintindihan ng anak ko.

Mabilis lumipas ang panahon when I feel the nervous of my system. Nararamdaman ko paunti unti ang hilab ng tyan ko, kinukuha noon ang lakas ko. Still another day I am happy and excited at the same time.

We are waiting for the baby to come out. Sometimes I listen to the music with my head phones at pinaparinig ko iyon sa anak ko. Nagiging malikot na rin sya and continue to kicking. It hurts sometimes but feel good. Minsan ay inaalalayan na ako ni Hans tumayo dahil sa bigat ni baby. It's my first time to get pregnant and it's so big.

I ponytail my hair in the mirror while wearing a blue dress. I'm on a normal birth so we decided to gave birth on Hans house. Masyadong malayo ang Hospital, maybe in time, not on my due date, I will feel the pain because of Labor.

"Ok ka lang ba?" Nagpa-panic na sabi nya nang hawakan ko ang tyan ko.

I can see his eyes in panicked, still has a feelings for me. Alam ko naman na temporary lang iyon sa dalas naming mag kasama.

Napangiwi ako ng maramdaman ko na naman ang sakit. "Ah.. it hurts." Nabitawan ko ang suklay at agad nyang kinuha ang cellphone para may tawagan.

The midwives and etc are here now because of call. Hans knew the girl who will guide me because of feeling labor.

"You need to follow the construction." I nodded when I closed my eyes.

F**k it's so hurts. Napahawak ako sa tyan ko ng maramdaman ang sakit na iyon. I'm in labor, it hurts when I feel my baby moving inside my womb.

After an hour my water broke, luckily my baby is excited to see the world and I gave birth on him in just a minutes. I heard his cry same with my tears falling because of happiness.

Napasandal ako kay Hans na nasa likod ko nang ibigay nila sa akin ang anak ko. I looked his beautiful eyes like mine but his facial features are his father.

Hinalikan ko sya sa noo habang nanlalabo ang paningin ko. I can't believe that I will be a mother in this early age, but I didn't have regrets when I saw him looking at me, stopped crying.

"CONGRATULATIONS, what your baby's name?"

I smiled by myself, still crying when I remember his father "Ellios Ren V. Alseiti."

"Chloe."

My mind was interrupted by his call when I looked at him. My face was emotionless and remember that he's here at the Coffee shop, sipping while looking at me at his serious face.

"That enough for you to know, I'm already done to you." Sagot ko bago kunin ang bag at umalis na doon.

Pagkalabas ko ay agad akong sumakay sa kotse ko. 7 years of suffering is still not yet done to me. My brother is gone and I don't know if he is alive. Nang matapos ang huling pagkikita namin doon ay sinubukan ko nang alisin ang mga alala nya sa akin.

I'm still feeling betrayed because of him. Kahit kailan, hindi ako nag tanong at hindi ko sya pinagdudahan. Nagsimulang tumulo ang mga luha ko nang malinaw pa rin sa isip ko ang babae na hinalikan nya 7 years ago.

Mabilis akong nakarating ng bahay at doon nag a abang ang anak ko. Wala si Hans doon ng makarating ako, probably working.

"Mom, are you okay?" Pinigilan ko ang sakit nang nararamdaman ko matapos ang ilang taon na tinago ko.

Inayos ko ang malambot at itim na buhok nya. "Of course, your mom is okay. Let's get in?"

Pinanliitan nya ako ng mata kaya natawa ako, nakuha nya sa akin ang reaksyon na iyon kaya nakikita ko ang sarili ko noon sa kanya. "Sure po."

I am getting better for now a days without him. Taking medicine because of my depression. Kung wala lang siguro ang anak ko ay matagal na akong sumuko. I got revenge when after a month of giving birth to Ren

My mind was clouded and it was proved that my father is involved of killing his family, together with Gutierrez. It's not satisfying if the two boys and fake pretending Gutierrez in the beginning are die with my own hands. Especially, they died but we did not know who's the killer. Probably mysterious guy, but I have this instinct that I knew it was him.

"Mom, can you teach me how to cook and bake again?" Tumango naman agad ako sa kanya.

"Oo naman, ano ba ang gusto mong ulamin natin for lunch?" Ngiti ko sa kanya nang tinanggal nya ang hibla ng buhok sa mukha ko at inilagay iyon sa tenga ko.

He smiled shyly. "Sinigang, can we?" His eyes sparkled, sinigang os his favourite.

"Sure."