Kisses Before Rejection

[GIDEON]

Gideon looked at his mate, his heart breaking for the tenth time in the little time they had been together. He wanted to make things better for him, he wanted to hug him and tell him things would be okay.

But Gideon knew this wolf knew.

"It's tempting really. I must admit, little wolf, I knew you were smart, but this smart and observant? I must have done something good in my past lives to have you as my mate, little wolf—" Gideon said but once again the wolf warrior interrupted his line of speech.

Gideon had already realized that every word that came out of his mate's mouth was like a stab to his heart. It was all about him coming to terms with a reality he was determined to run away from. Maybe this was how it was to end for them, but why did it hurt each time?

Why did his mate make him feel like there were a thousand stab wounds in his heart? Why did all of this make him actually want to rethink everything he was currently doing? Someday, he would have to finally sit down and deal with his demons, but today, was just not it.

Today was about goodbyes, but the more he stood next to this wolf, the more he realized how much of a coward he was becoming.

"Won't you even call me by my name? I wish to hear it from your lips, the very lips that just mated mine. The lips that I can't stop thinking about. It's quite sad really, how I know that this was a decision you had made earlier before even stepping into Acrod.

"And yet some part of me still hoped that there was a future for us. A part of me wished we could be together even for more than a day. A part of me wanted things to be normal, for once, but maybe I hoped too much my love.

"Maybe I put too much pressure on the deities, and this right here is my punishment. Maybe there is just no other way, and as much as it hurts, I know I have to accept that. I was hoping you'd change our mind even after our bond, but now I know, it can't be done.

"At least tell me what you think, how you think. I don't know, but anything, Gideon, Anything. I don't want this to be the end because we haven't even begun," the warrior said dejectedly, his voice slowly breaking.

He was showing weakness to a different faction. He was letting his guard down and that was risky, but then the man in front of him was his mate. The man who didn't want him and yet wanted him with the same intensity, was the love of his life.

Gideon looked at the little wolf warrior he had taken a liking to. He studied his mate, gently breathing him in like this was the actual last time they would be together. He could feel his pain, because of the bond they shared, and for a moment, Gideon wanted to ignore the fates.

For that moment, he wanted to pretend that they were in their own world, just him and his little wolf, living their lives to the fullest, but that was an illusion. However much they both wanted it, there were so many dangers lurking around, and Gideon couldn't afford that.

So in response to his mate breaking right in front of him, Gideon kissed his forehead. That was the least he could do right now, because he knew for a fact that if he let himself drown in the warrior's love for him, there was o way he would go back to Greroth.

And Greroth was where everything could be fixed.

Greroth was his home. had been his home for the past few years. That place had taken him in when he was at his lowest and that was the home he would always know.

"Oh love. Please tell me you understand why I have to leave—" Gideon said to the warrior, in the hope that it would clear his own guilt, but what was the point when he could feel the whole of his body hurting because of what he was doing?

"I know you're about to reject me, but, before you reject me, I have one last favor to ask of you, and you can't deny me that, no matter what is going on in your head Gideon," the warrior said, trying to manage a smile, even when his heart was about to be crushed into pieces.

Gideon looked at his little wolf, a similar sad smile on his face, before asking him, "What is it little wolf?"

He knew this was risky, because the wolf could literally ask for anything, and it would be cruel for him to deny it. But what if the warrior asked for his hand? What of the warrior told him to choose Acrod?

What if the warrior wanted to go back with him, despite the innumerable times that Gideon had insisted that they couldn't? There were so many what-ifs in their situation, but right now, Gideon wasn't thinking of the possibilities.

He was thinking of how the man in front of him could be so strong and gentle at the same time. He was thinking of the way they could have had a beautiful family together. However, once again, his line of thoughts was interrupted by his mate's insane wish. What the fuck had he done?

"Will you at least kiss me before you reject me?"

"What? Oh, love" Gideon sighed sadly, before slamming their lips together, without so much as a warning. He knew if he gave the warrior a chance to think about it then they wouldn't do shit together, and that wouldn't be fair.

Gideon knew the warrior was trying to feel better, but there was never anything good about seeing a rejection coming and being forced to accept it. So he wanted to make things right for the warrior. At least then, he would have a better life, but would he?

Was there a guarantee for that, and if there was, what was it? Gideon knew that this was also his chance to express how sorry he was for doing this. He wanted to make the warrior understand that it was a necessary evil.

So in their battle of lips and moans, Gideon expressed himself, apologizing in the only way he could at the moment, savoring the wolf-like he was everything to Gideon. of course he was everything, but Gideon just wished he could have met his mate at a different time.

Probably when he was not an angry young man who wanted vengeance and death upon Udrad. He wished they could have met at a different time.

Their bond was so perfect it broke Gideon's heart, but this wasn't to bloom. he knew they would use the warrior to get to him, and he did want that. At least if he rejected the warrior, there would be no bonds between them and there wouldn't be a risk.

they would both be able to live their lives without having to worry about Gideon's enemies coming after the young wolf. Of course, Gideon could handle himself if ever the young wolf's enemies came after him.

But he was sure the little wolf would be hurt if Gideon's enemies went after him.

It was too risy and he couldn't let that happen.