Papers with Lots of Words

"Repeat after me: I do solemnly swear to not discuss anything that I see, hear, or can plausibly confirm that happens here to anyone outside of this compound and anyone without a need to know and proper clearance."

"I do solemnly swear to not discuss anything that I see, hear, or can plausibly confirm that happens here to anyone outside of this compound and anyone without a need to know and proper clearance." Fucking oaths. Mal thinks, ruminating about the first oath consuming four years of his life.

"Please sign and date here, here, here, and here. Here's your badge, keep it on you and visible at all time within the compound. If at any time you are outside the compound, please ensure it is out of sight and on your person at all times. Mr. Viscer, he's yours."

"Thank you Sergeant Mackey. Come on Mal, time to get you prepped for your date."

"Luke, you and I both know this shit ain't making me feel any better. How long did you say the surgery would take?"

"Y'know, for a man resigned to spend the next two months in a device-sustained state of life, with no control of his actual body, you ask a lot of questions about 'how long' everything will take. Relax! You're in my hands, and I'm the one that's running your pod while you're here. Look, I'll make sure nothing happens to you, your parents were already notified that you've been pulled back into active duty, so hopefully they and your two sisters won't panic when they can't find you. All of your bills have been paid, everything else is on pause due to military orders, you're free right now man! And all of this for just two months of your life completely gone. Playing video games nonetheless! Better deal than the last time you took a government paycheck, huh?"

"Yeah, sure. Except the fact that this time you're shoving a metal cylinder into my neck where my brain stem should be. Are you sure this thing is safe?"

"Yo, what happened to Mr. Big Bad Sailor Dude? We're *pretty* sure it is. I mean, again, first human trials. But we didn't kill any rats with this prototype, so you've got that going for you!"

"Oh yeah! Real comforting… Fine, fine, I'll calm down." Mal takes a deep breath and stops his hands from shaking again. "So, I'm going under today, then not waking up until the trial is completed, right?"

"That's the plan. We still have to prep some more paperwork, including your will, insurance, loss of rights to human autonomy for the period of the trial, and your NDA for anything you experience. Nothing big."

"Wait, what?! Loss of rights… dude, the hell?!"

"Oh, it's standard operations man. Basically, you're signing off on the fact that we're allowed to do whatever is necessary for the trial to your body. Since you'll be under and we're just examining how your body is handling the device and the inputs, and preventing atrophy, there's really no big concerns for you. It's just to make sure that if we have someone snooping through the legality of the process, we can be sure nothing will fall back on us and the government can take control of the situation before it causes any issues."

"Oh, when you put it that way... " Mal sighs, his frustration and nerves slowly loosening. "Alright, so, where's the paper work?"

"This room. Take this stack, read through it, or don't, I don't care, and sign every line that's highlighted or tagged. I'll be back in like half an hour and check how far you are." After he says this, Luke pushes Mal into a small room with a chair, desk and stack of papers that goes from his belt to the lower part of his ribs.

"Oh sweet merciful heavens, why did I sign up for this?" Mal grumbles as he sits down in the chair and starts reading the multitude of documents that are currently preventing him from the biggest leap of faith in his life.

…

An hour later, Luke walks in and sees Mal with his head on the desk and the stack of papers next to him reversed from its original position.

"My bad man, had to calibrate your equipment a little bit. Bunch of monkeys I work with decided you were three inches shorter than the measurements I gave them."

…

"Mal, you okay?"

…

"Yo, Malchazar?!"

"SWEET MERCIFUL FUCK!" Mal skyrockets up and backs against the wall.

"Shit!"

"What? Who?! I'm fine, I'm fine!"

"Mal, what the hell?! Scared the shit out of me!" Luke gasps out, still panting.

"Ooph, sorry man. Bad dreams. I was attacked by an evil tribe of paper documents." Mal eyes the stack of papers suspiciously.