THE HEROINE'S DIARY

<Celeste Montali's Diary>

"YOU'RE ALREADY a grown woman inside, and yet, you want to marry a child? That's creepy."

Ouch.

I didn't expect those vicious words from Sonata Florin, the eleven-year-old heroine of my favorite romance fantasy novel 'Unholy Marriage,' after I shared my life story with her.

By that, I mean revealing the fact that I came from another world.

That I only look like a child outside because of the body I possessed, but I'm a grown woman inside.

"Miss Sonata, please don't misunderstand," I pleaded. "It's true that I need to marry the boy you saved, but it's only for my survival."

Diether Hexford, the unconscious boy, is the novel's hero and Sonata's future husband.

[It's amazing how I met the hero and the heroine in this dangerous setting.]

We were shipwrecked off the coast of an unfamiliar island and met unexpectedly.

"How is a cradle snatcher the heroine of a romance novel?"

Again, ouch.

"It seems like you weren't listening to me properly, Miss Sonata," I said defensively. "You are the heroine of the novel and not me."

[Uhm, let's backtrack a little.]

***

JUST A week ago, I was living a miserable life as Choi Aera– a twenty-five-year-old Kpop idol-slash-actress embroiled in a bullying scandal.

The stress gave me insomnia.

One night, after taking my meds, I slept peacefully only to wake up as a different person inside a fantasy world the next day. To be precise, I possessed Celeste Montali– the first wife of the novel's hero.

[And a character destined to die later.]

It has only been a week since I possessed the twelve-year-old rich commoner.

Even so, I've adjusted quickly. I hate my life as Choi Aera, after all.

[I was dumb and young in high school, hanging out with the wrong crowd. But I never participated in the bullying. I learned the hard way that being a spectator makes me just as guilty as the bullies.]

As a result of my reckless teenage years, my life and career were ruined overnight.

Waking up as Celeste was a blessing in disguise.

Luckily, I have the original Celeste's memories. I also have the acting skills I honed as Choi Aera to help me act like how the original Celeste did.

The only problem is I entered the novel way too early.

[Let's backtrack a little more.]

So, three days ago, I boarded a cruise ship with my new parents for vacation.

I locked myself in the cabin planning how to avoid my early death, actively avoiding spending time with my new parents.

Then... boom!

The cruise ship sank after a huge explosion.

I hit my head hard on the bedside table when the cruise ship shook hard, then I fainted.

When I opened my eyes, the first thing I saw was the heroine.

Sonata, Unholy Marriage's heroine, has purple hair and unique golden eyes.

[That's how I instantly recognized her.]

Then my focus shifted to the unconscious hero that Sonata is busy saving.

[The novel stated several times that only Diether Hexford has silver-blue hair on the entire continent, so I can't be mistaken.]

Anyway, I'm quite mesmerized watching Sonata suck out the poison from the venomous wound on Diether's arm. Experts from the modern world wouldn't recommend that.

[But the novel said Sonata is an expert in poison arts.]

Plus, this is a fantasy world.

"You're amazing, Sonata."

I realized my mistake as soon as the heroine turned to me with suspicious eyes.

[Oh, no.]

"I didn't give you my name yet. Did my father send you after me?"

[Let's come clean to earn Sonata's trust.]

"I know what I'm about to say may sound crazy, but I swear I'll only spill the truth," I said, hoping that my sincerity reached Sonata who is supposedly good at judging people. "Actually, I'm not from this world..."

And that was how I ended up telling my story.

Sonata, on the other hand, listened while cleaning Diether's wound.

"When I woke up, I'm already in possession of this body."

Sonata sat on the sand, put the unconscious Diether's head on her lap, then leaned against the boulder behind her. "So, I'm just a book character in some novel that you've read before?"

I gasped, realizing my careless mistake.

"You're saying this world is nothing but a world inside a novel?" Sonata asked, tilting her head to one side. "Fascinating."

Whew.

I'm relieved by Sonata's calm reaction.

"But..."

"Yes, Miss Sonata?"

"You're already an adult inside, and yet, you want to marry a child? That's creepy."

Ouch.

"How is a cradle snatcher the heroine of a romance novel?"

"It seems like you weren't listening to me properly, Miss Sonata," I said defensively. "You are the heroine of the novel and not me."

Sonata just remained silent.

"I need to marry the boy," I said hesitantly. Argh, Sonata's silence is making me talk more. "For my survival."

After all, the novel stated Diether's mother adored Celeste.

Of course, I'm aware that the child died at Diether's hands.

[But since I know the 'future,' I can change that gruesome fate.]

"You keep saying I'm the "heroine" of this world."

"That's right– you are the heroine, Miss Sonata."

"I've been reading all sorts of books since I was three," Sonata said. "My experience as a reader tells me your interesting life story as a "transmigrator" makes you more of a main character."

"Huh?"

"The fact that you're here now already changed the story that you know," Sonata said casually. "Don't you think you've already become the heroine of this world?"

That's... valid?

"I hope I'm wrong, though," Sonata said while looking at Diether. "Marrying a child is already bad enough– but it looks like you're going to practically raise your husband, too."

My conscience is clean, but Sonata's harsh words make me feel guilty.

[I need the Hexfords.]

There's a reason why I avoided my new parents.

[I'm pretty sure this is the tragic accident that killed Celeste's parents.]

I also know that Celeste's greedy relatives would steal the poor child's inheritance by faking her parents' will, and I don't have the energy to deal with that.

[The best course of action is to marry Diether Hexford and live comfortably.]

"In the original story, Celeste died early," I confessed. "A few years after Celeste's death, you and Diether Hexford got married."

Ah, I mentioned Diether's name out loud.

But Sonata just looked at me as if she wasn't interested.

"I have no intention of dying here," I declared firmly. "But don't worry, Miss Sonata. I will divorce Diether Hexford later."

[I just need enough time to save up money before running away.]

"I will run away as soon as I have the funds and means to do so."

"Are you confident that you can run away by then?"

"Huh?"

"Haven't you considered the possibility that Diether Hexford may fall in love with you?"

"That won't happen," I said confidently. "After all, it's you who's destined to be with Diether, Miss Sonata."

"The story has already changed, and will continue changing because of you," Sonata said with a straight face. "Why do you still insist on following the 'plot' of the novel that's obviously in shambles now?"

"Because it feels wrong," I argued firmly. "I'm already a grown woman inside, so why would I fall for my young future husband?"

[And those were probably my famous last words.]

***

I CAN'T really remember what happened next after my (almost) one-sided conversation with Sonata. In fact, I don't even recall falling asleep. But when I opened my eyes, I'm already lying on a bed...

... while holding the hand of a sleeping boy.

[Diether Hexford?!]

"Dear, you're awake?"

I turned to the beautiful lady sitting on the chair beside the bed.

Platinum blonde hair, clear blue eyes. The lady, who looks like she's only in her early thirties, looks at me as if she's about to cry any moment.

I'm pretty sure this is Grand Duchess Eleanor Hexford, the male lead's mother.

"Child, may I ask you some questions?"

I nodded slowly, acting meek.

"May I know your name?"

"It's Celeste Montali, ma'am."

"Montali..." Lady Eleanor whispered, obviously relieved. "Miss Celeste, are Zekiel and Helene Montali you parents?"

I pretended to be confused, then I acted like I'm having a panic attack. "My parents! Ma'am, do you know where my mother and father are? They're with me in the cruise ship...!"

[My past as an idol-slash-actress comes in handy now, huh?]

"Miss Celeste, I know it's hard, but please calm down," Lady Eleanor said, holding my shoulders in an attempt to soothe me. "I hate to be the bearer of the bad news, but you have the right to know. Your father... and mother... they didn't survive the shipwreck."

"That can't be true, ma'am. My parents... I need to see them first..."

To complete my act, I pulled my hand away from (the sleeping) Diether's grasp. Then I tried to stand up, but my knees gave up quickly.

That wasn't an act.

My entire body really feels like a Jell-O at the moment.

"You shouldn't move abruptly, Miss Celeste," Lady Eleanor said while helping me get back to bed. "I already identified your parents' bodies, and I already took care of all the necessary procedures. You can check them later, so please take a rest for now."

"Ma'am, I'm grateful, but I'm confused," I said, acting anxious. "Why are you helping me?"

Lady Eleanor smiled sadly at me. "I'm a good friend of your late father, Miss Celeste."

[Let's pretend I don't know Lady Eleanor is still in love with Celeste's father– her ex-lover.]

"Perhaps, are you... Lady Eleanor?"

"You know me?"

"My father often mentioned his friend, 'Lady Eleanor,' to me. Father didn't have any noble friends in our town, so I thought he was just lying," I lied. "B-but I didn't expect we'd meet like this, my lady..."

Lady Eleanor's eyes brimmed with tears. "Miss Celeste, would you like to be my daughter-in-law?"

"Is that even possible, my lady?"

I'm just acting dumb.

I know noble children in this world could get married as early as ten years old. But a child marriage is considered a political marriage. Hence, it's not consummated until both parties are of age. And they're strict about that rule.

"A child marriage is allowed within the nobility. I would love to adopt you as my daughter, but my husband would never allow it, so I'd like you to marry my son instead," Lady Eleanor explained. "But don't worry, Miss Celeste. You just need to marry my son in order to use our family name. You're free to divorce him anytime."

"That offer sounds too good to be true, ma'am," I said hesitantly, hiding my excitement. "Why are you being good to me?"

"You saved my son's life, Miss Celeste."

Huh?

"Diether briefly woke up earlier," the Grand Duchess explained. "He said a girl around his age saved him. He couldn't remember what the girl looks like, but you were the only person beside my son when the rescuers found him."

What happened to Sonata then?

I'm curious, but since my survival comes first, I just shrugged it off.

[Sonata is the heroine– she'll be fine.]

"Miss Celeste, was my son mistaken?"

"No, my lady," I said, shaking my head. Then I turned to Diether Hexford who's still sleeping peacefully beside me. "I saved this boy's life."

And that's how I, Celeste Montali, became Diether Hexford's fiancée.

***

IT HAS only been two weeks since I arrived at the estate, but everyone is already treating me like I'm the daughter of House Hexford. I particularly grew close with Riette, the maid that Lady Eleanor assigned to me.

My appearance definitely played a huge part in charming the people around me.

[Celeste's pastel pink hair and baby blue eyes make her look soft, and that makes everyone feel like they have to protect me.]

But I can't use my appearance on Diether who keeps avoiding me.

And that hinders my mission.

[The reason Diether killed Celeste in the novel is related to his mommy issues, so I need to fix his mommy issues by helping him get close to Lady Eleanor.]

Fortunately, an opportunity arrived.

After I heard the name of the guest who arrived at the estate this morning, I sneakily followed the servants that brought refreshments. Then I hid behind the bushes while watching Diether and the guest who are having tea in the garden.

Don Baldwin, the guest, was Diether's older cousin from his mother's side.

"I heard that the child is the child of Aunt Eleanor's ex-lover, Diether."

"..."

"You have to get rid of that child, Diether."

[Excuse me???]

"It's only been a week, but I heard Aunt Eleanor is already enamored with that child. Auntie probably sees her dead ex-lover in that little girl."

[Well, he's not wrong...]

"At this rate, that child will steal all of Aunt Eleanor's love and attention from you."

[So, this little bastard was the one who made Diether hate Celeste!]

"My poor cousin, don't forget that your father only forced Aunt Eleanor to marry him. You weren't born out of love."

[Why would you say something like that to a child?!]

"You're the son of the monster who tormented Aunt Eleanor, so how do you expect your mother to love you?"

[This snake...!]

"Unfortunately, you were also born ugly and weak. No wonder Uncle Daniel is disappointed to have a son like you."

My hand subconsciously reached for the stone near my feet.

"I'm the only one in the family who can tolerate your existence, Diether. Hence, you should listen to me. Get rid of that child– ouch!"

Don Baldwin was forced to stop sprouting gibberish after getting hit by a stone. It was the stone that I threw at him.

Then I ran to Diether.

"Don't listen to him," I said, covering Diether's ears with my hands. Then I copied what Sonata said to him in the novel. "I don't know about your parents, but there's at least one person who's glad that you're alive. And that's me, Diether. I don't regret saving your life– and I never will. Plus, you're handsome and cool!"

Diether's pretty sky-blue eyes widened as they twinkled beautifully.

I feel guilty for stealing Sonata's line because it was the line that made Diether fall in love with Sonata.

But it won't have the same effect, right?

[There's no way a child would fall in love with a stranger just because of a few kind words.]

"You peasant!"

Ow!

Don Baldwin suddenly grabbed and pulled my hair after calling me a 'peasant.'

[This snake has a death wish, huh?]

***

AFTER I got treatment for the scratches and bruises I received from having a dog fight with Don Baldwin, I told Lady Eleanor the things Don Baldwin said earlier.

[Now she's shocked.]

"Your Grace, thank you for being kind to me, but I need to leave now," I said, acting hesitant. "I can't stay here anymore."

"What do you mean by that, Celeste?"

I thought of all the mean things Knetz had said to me ever since I debuted as an idol.

And, just like that, tears rolled down my face.

"Your Grace, I don't want to steal your love and attention from Lord Diether," I said between sobs. "And please don't let your feelings for my father stop you from being a good mother to your son."

Lady Eleanor covered her mouth with her hands.

"Your Grace, if you're only kind to me because you see my father in me, then please stop," I said in a cracked voice. "Lord Diether and I don't deserve all of this."

I wanted to say more, but Lady Eleanor suddenly burst out crying.

"I'm so sorry, Celeste," Lady Eleanor said, hugging her tight. "You're right – both you and Diether don't deserve to suffer because of me."

***

I WAS surprised to wake up and see Diether holding a bouquet of red roses while standing in front of my bed.

The child's face is as red as the flowers.

[Cute.]

"I don't think I've thanked you for saving my life yet, but Mother said it's better late than never," Diether said shyly. "Thank you for saving me, Celeste."

I feel bad for taking credit for Sonata's hard work, but I need to survive.

"And thank you for defending me from Don."

"You're welcome, Lord Diether," I said, smiling while accepting the flowers from him. "What happened to Lord Don?"

Diether sat on the chair beside the bed. "Mother asked Don to leave the estate. From now on, anyone from House Baldwin is banned from coming here."

Good riddance.

"Don blamed his inferiority complex for his behavior," Diether explained. "He also said he tried to manipulate me into thinking that he's the only person who cares about me in order to control me like a puppet. He's probably aiming for my inheritance."

[Yep, and that bastard did worse in the novel.]

"I... had a long conversation with Mother after she kicked out Don," Diether said nervously. "Mother apologized for being neglectful of me all this time. She then promised to be a better mother to me."

"Have you forgiven Lady Eleanor?"

He nodded, his face lighting up. "Mother already apologized and promised to treat me better, what more could I ask for? I'm just happy that there are at least two people now who are grateful for my existence."

I smiled and nodded. "Good for you, my lord."

Diether looked at me, his face flushed and his eyes bright. "Celeste, I heard Mother brought you here to be my wife."

"But don't you hate me?"

"I did, but it was more because of Don's influence," Diether confessed. "However, now I know you're not here to steal my mother away from me. In fact, you're the bridge that connected us together." He smiled charmingly. "Thank you for coming into my life, Celeste. You're my lucky charm."

BADUMP.

No, my heart did not just go 'BADUMP' for a child!

"This time, I want to be your lucky charm," Diether said shyly. "I heard you lost your inheritance to your relatives. My mother and I can't help you with that because my father forbade us from meddling with your family affairs."

Of course, the Grand Duke would refuse to help.

[After all, the Montalis are the relatives of Lady Eleanor's ex-lover.]

"But Mother made a deal with Father. I don't know what the deal was, but Father allowed us to get married."

[Lady Eleanor probably threatened her husband with divorce.]

"If my name could be used as your protection, then feel free to use it until it no longer serves you purpose," Diether said, then he offered his hand to me. "Celeste, shall we get married?"

I immediately grabbed Diether's hand. "Let's do that, Lord Diether."

Diether kissed the back of my hand, and I may or may not blush.

***

I'M NOW fourteen years old, and still happily married.

I spent the last two years establishing my position as Diether's wife. Thanks to my cheerful persona, everyone in the mansion fell in love with my charm.

[I used to make a living in acting cute, after all.]

The only people I didn't manage to charm were Grand Duke Daniel Hexford (Diether's father) and the vassal families. It's because they can't accept a commoner as the successor's wife.

Hence, to ensure that I won't get kicked out unprepared, I went to a dessert shop called 'Candyfloss' and meet Carmine– a flamboyant woman in her mid-twenties with flaming red hair.

'Candyfloss' is secretly an information guild, and this woman is the head.

"I won't ask how you found me," Miss Carmine said while lighting up her cigarette. "I'm more curious about what the future Grand Duchess Hexford wants with my guild."

[Sorry, Sonata. I'll use the same trick you used to strike a deal with Miss Carmine.]

There's only one reason why she chose Candyfloss: this is the same guild that helped Sonata run away from her biological family in the novel.

"I'm going to run away from House Hexford in a few years, so I'll need a new identity and a hiding place later," I said bluntly. "If you arrange that for me, I'll tell you how to destroy your father's guild, ma'am."

***

CELESTE Montali was fifteen years old when she died in the novel.

It happened when Diether lost his mind after Lady Eleanor took her own life. Since Diether had always been jealous of his wife whom his mother loved more than him, he killed her the moment his mind snapped.

But it turned out that Diether was drugged by Don Baldwin that night, hence Diether actually didn't know what he was doing then.

So, the hero wasn't punished by the law.

[It's hard to punish the future Grand Duke anyway.]

Fortunately, I already got rid of Don Baldwin. Even so, I'm still nervous now that I'm fifteen.

"Young Lady Celeste?"

Sir Albert, the Grand Duke's personal knight, blocked my way.

[Where are my servants...?]

I smiled to hide my nervousness. "Yes, Sir Albert?"

Sir Albert smiled coldly, then he raised his hand. "Good night, young lady."

***

WHEN I opened my eyes, the first thing that greeted me was Grand Duke Daniel Hexford's cold face.

Wow.

[Diether really got his good looks from his dad.]

Of course, this isn't the first time that I saw the Grand Duke in person.

[Father didn't attend our wedding, and he's barely home since he's always working in the palace. But every weekend, we're forced to have lunch with him. Despite that, I still get impressed by his visuals.]

"Divorce my son."

Okay, that snapped me out of my daydream.

I sat properly, my knees touching the ground while my hands are tied behind my back.

[I can tell I'm in a shabby warehouse, but why would my father-in-law bring me here when he has many other empty villas?]

"I'll buy you a noble title and compensate you well after the divorce."

[I know the Grand Duke would give me a hefty amount of money, but I don't want to get on Diether's bad side.]

"Father–"

"I found a better match for my son," Daniel Hexford said, cutting her off. "She's the only lady suited to become the next Grand Duchess."

"Father, I can't divorce Diether yet," I said weakly. "Not yet, at least."

My father-in-law was about to ask something when, suddenly, the door burst open.

"Father!"

My husband arrived, a blood-covered sword in one hand.

[He's fuming.]

"How dare you do this to my wife, Father?" Diether yelled angrily, grabbing his father by the collar. "Is it not enough to torment Mother that you have to hurt my innocent wife, too?!"

[I'm not exactly innocent, Diether...]

"I wouldn't have resorted to this had you divorced your wife when I told you to do so."

"Stop it, Father," Diether said, his jaw clenching hard. "I will NEVER divorce my wife."

I flinched.

[But we need to divorce later, Diether.]

"Son, attend to your wife first."

It was my mother-in-law who had just arrived.

"Celeste, are you alright?" Diether asked, kneeling down in front of me. He dropped his bloody sword on the floor and untied me. Then he gently took my hands in his, frowning while looking at the ugly marks around my wrists. "You're hurt..."

"I'm alright, Diether," I assured my husband before he goes ballistic. "It doesn't hurt much."

Diether looks like he's about to cry, then he nuzzled his face against my shoulder as if he doesn't want to show me his vulnerability. "I'm sorry, Celeste. I failed to protect you. If something bad happened to you, I would never forgive myself..."

"It's not your fault, Diether," I said, wrapping my arms around my husband's shaking shoulders. "I'm fine, so don't cry."

SLAP.

I was startled by the loud sound that echoed in the room.

Lady Eleanor slapped Daniel Hexford on the face– hard. The Grand Duke's cheek quickly turned red, but he didn't budge.

[Omo...]

"I will not divorce you since we have an agreement, but I can't live with you anymore, you cold-hearted bastard," Lady Eleanor said callously. "I'm leaving you– and I'm taking Diether and Celeste with me."

***

CASNIA ISLANDS.

It's our new home.

The Grand Duchy of Verwin, the territory that belongs to House Hexford, occupies the Alaree Peninsula. It's one of the three peninsulas in the Alson Continent where Zerua Kingdom is located.

Casnia Islands still belongs to my father-in-law, but it's okay since it looks like the Grand Duke has no intention of following us here.

[As the king's younger brother and aide, Father needs to stay in the Royal Capital anyway.]

"Celeste, are you okay with this place?"

I turned to Diether.

We have toured the island all day and, right now, we're watching the beautiful sunset while sitting on a boulder by the beach.

"I'm worried you might get bored since life is slow here," Diether said worriedly. "Moreover, I'll be returning to the Academy soon, so..."

I smiled and patted his shoulder. "Diether, I heard this island has a subtropical climate."

"That's right. What about it?"

I grinned, remembering how Sonata made Casnia Islands the center of tourism in the entire kingdom. "My dear husband, I think it will be possible to grow coconut trees here."

In the novel, Sonata discovered a small island where coconuts could grow fast...

... and found the next Saintess.

"Do you want to plant trees?" Diether asked excitedly. "It's good to have a hobby, my dear wife."

Ah, he thinks I just found a new hobby.

[This 'hobby' of mine will lead you to the Saintess that will help you in your career later~]

"That's right, I found a new hobby," I agreed with my husband, grinning. "My dear husband, once I succeed, I will support you and Mother financially so that we don't have to depend on Father anymore."

Diether, who probably thought I was joking, laughed. "Then I'll be a good house husband, my dear wife."

That promise may or may not have made my heart skip a beat.

***

IN JUST three years, I became the richest woman in the Zerua Kingdom.

All the businesses I started while copying what Sonata did in the novel became a huge hit. Thanks to that, I finally paid what I owed Miss Carmine. Most of all, I have enough savings to run away from Diether.

But that's not the only reason why I'm eager to leave the family now.

"Are you crazy, Diether?" I complained between gasps. It's not easy for me to breathe since I have a fever. "The king summoned you to the Royal Palace!"

Tonight is the night Sonata's adoptive parents are being honored at the Royal Palace. The heroine's adoptive parents were war heroes who died during the recent war against Corrupted Monsters.

[In the novel, Diether and Sonata's love story began after Diether "accidentally" consoled Sonata during the memorial service.]

"How can I leave my sick wife?"

"I'm not dying, Diether. If you leave now, you can still make it if you use a portal–"

"No," Diether said, cutting me off. "I'm staying."

"Why..."

I trailed off when I realized I didn't want to hear the answer, but it's already too late.

"Are you asking because you really don't know?" Diether asked cheekily, kissing my forehead. "You can't be that dense, Celeste."

Of course, I'm not.

[Diether is in love with me.]

I shut my eyes tight.

[I'm so sorry, Sonata...]

***

THE midnight Diether turned eighteen, the gift I sent him was the divorce paper I signed in advance.

And then I, Celeste Montali, completely vanished from his life.

Sonata Florin, you're the heroine of this world– so Diether Hexford belongs to you.

***

SONATA closed the diary that Celeste Montali had left for her.

[I don't remember you, but congratulations on running away, Celeste.]

"You can't use this room, Lady Sonata."

Sonta raised her head and looked at the man standing in front of her. "Does this room used to belong to your first wife?"

Diether clenched his jaw, but he didn't deny it.

"Then do you want your new wife to use a guest room and become a laughingstock?" Sonata asked, smiling as she stood up. "Lord Diether, if you can't treat me like your wife, then at least give me the basic respect I deserve. It was you who asked me to marry you, remember?"

Diether avoided her gaze as if he was denying reality.

[Celeste Montali, this is Diether Hexford now– he's already twenty-one years old, yet still in love with you.]

This was how Sonata's married life started after the heroine vanished.

[And this unholy marriage began a few months ago...]