Changing the Future

It was a fine line. I had to get her to not do drugs but still go to the party when she got pregnant. Maybe I could go with her to see who the father was. We never knew and she told us she was too high to find out. Then I thought about having to fight for custody with the baby daddy. I guess I will have to fight that battle later.

If it could save my sister, it would be worth it! She ended up dying at age 18 at a rehab center. My mom adopted my nephew and raised him as her own. It finally pushed her to divorce my stepdad and try to better her life.

This time, I would try to make some money, so my mom didn't have to work so much. Then she would see how abusive James was towards us and divorce him sooner. I thought about the future for the rest of the afternoon.

All the teachers had the news on and told us we were living through history. We learned more that day by watching TV than we would have otherwise.

I walked home with my friend Alice, she lived close to the school, so we would walk until we reached her house, and I would walk the rest of the way with my younger siblings.

 I picked them up after school recess since my high school let out at 4. The elementary let out at 3, but a lot of kids stayed later because their parents had to work till 5. We did not live close to school, so we walked almost 3 miles every day to get home.

We would stop at a convenience store and get some water on the way. Sometimes someone would feel bad for us and buy us snacks. People were nice in our little town!

I noticed when we got home that my stomach wasn't upset at all today! That proved it. I was lactose intolerant. No more diary! I was already thin for my height, but I needed to start eating healthier. More fruits and vegetables and less fried foods and desserts.

In my past life I had gained 100 lbs. after high school due to my polycystic ovarian syndrome or P.C.O.S. Since I already knew about it at this time, I would get my mom to take me to the doctor. We had low-income insurance, and I should have gotten that checked while I still had it. I lived with it for 10 years before I was finally able to get it taken care of. I also had Hypothyroidism that turned into Thyroid cancer. I eventually had to have a total Thyroidectomy and a Hysterectomy. Then at 40 died from Ovarian Cancer! I needed to get my hormones balanced ASAP!

I felt bad for the way I used to treat my boyfriend in high school. He eventually became my husband, but we broke up after high school because my hormones drove me crazy. Poor guy! He was so young and innocent when I met him. I put him through a lot, and he still chased after me. He was a great guy!

This time I vowed to treat him better and not break up with him. I caused him so much heartache and we had so many pointless arguments because I got mad at the small things. I was young, hormonal, and insecure. This time I had the maturity of a 40-year-old and knew better.

I made the younger kids a healthy snack of celery and peanut butter with raisins, or ants on a log. Then I told them to do their homework. My stepdad would come home soon and make us dinner. He was a great cook! It was one of the 2 things that he did well. The other was playing guitar. He was so good he could play behind his head! That was how my mom met him. He played guitar for the church band.

She had divorced my father and wanted a good Christian man. She saw James at Church and he was a single dad, so she assumed he was good with kids. They married quickly and he moved in with us. Before that, he was living in a garage apartment with both kids. He rented it from his friend at church and did odd jobs like painting houses to make money for food and rent.

My mom was the one with a mind for business. She had been a single mom for years and we never went without anything!

Dinner was a stir fry with rice and spring rolls! I loved homemade Asian food! I was spoiled because James was Thai. He came over when he was a child and his mom remarried to a man in the military. When he came to America he had a Thai name, but he told us he opened a phone book and picked a name at random. That was how he ended up with James.

He named his son James Jr, but he went by Jimmy. The funny thing was James' middle name was the same as my brother's first name Christopher! Christopher's middle name was James! It was after my grandfather. I was supposed to be named James if I was a boy, but I came out a girl, so my mom changed it to Jasmine.

My little stepsister was Caitlyn Ray, and she was a little Ray of sunshine! She was always happy and bubbly. She made friends easily. My younger sister was Amber May. She hated her middle name. She was a typical middle child who always felt neglected. I was the oldest and always had to be in charge and responsible for my younger siblings. Christopher was my mom's baby boy and was spoiled. I had to try and change their future for the better.

In my past life, Christopher started doing drugs in middle school and later went to jail. When he got out, he met a crazy girl from Arkansas and had 2 kids with her. He was in and out of jail in between the kids. We would have doubted he was the father except they looked just like him!

I hope if I introduce my brother to games or sports, I can keep him away from drugs. I hope it doesn't prevent my future niece and nephew. Maybe they will have a different mom and he won't have to go through a messy divorce and child custody battle.

Caitlyn and James moved in with their mother after my mom and James finally divorced. She was a much better parent than James. I'm not sure how James got custody in the first place. She was already raising a daughter from her first marriage. 2 more mouths to feed wouldn't be that much more.

There were so many things I wanted to change, but I had to be careful not to cause negative effects. The future can be unpredictable, but I already knew the major events. I could try and better my life and those I loved.

I thought about the stock market. The only person older than me that I trusted enough to help was my Uncle Darren and his wife Aunt Claudette. Uncle Darren was a preacher. His wife is my favorite! Don't tell the others. Lol! Inside joke, because my dad used to tell us each, we were his favorite and not to tell the others. It was one of the few good childhood memories I remember from my dad.

I could try to get Uncle Darren to invest in Home Depot. He was also a contractor, and he went to the Home Depot a lot! I heard something once, "Invest in something you use, that way every time you use it you get a little bit back!" It seemed like a good idea. Hopefully, I will see them soon and can bring it up. He was the only one who started a college fund for me when I was born, so I knew I could trust him.