He Wants To Forget Me

We are now inside. I showed him around the house and even showed him my room. He had a pretty expected reaction. I have photos of us in my room. I'm happy he didn't ask who is that or some stupid shit like that. It would've been annoying if he pulled some bullshit like that. Instead he just ignored them and asked about the other things in my room.

I showed him his room. It looks pretty bland but it's a guest room so what would you expect. We chilled out on the couch for a bit. I didn't say much to him. He tried getting me to talk about myself. It pissed me off so I just turned on a movie to shut him up.

I stayed up until 1 am watching 'Scotty Pilgrim vs. The Universe'. He fell asleep on the couch during the middle of it. It isn't all that unexpected. He always falls asleep during the middle of movies. He needs to move around to stay awake. I could never take him to the movies when I was younger because he would snore so loudly.

Luckily he doesn't snore no more. I knew i shouldnt just leave him sleeping on the couch so I reluctantly woke him up.

"Hey...Jones. Wake up. You need to go to sleep in your room."

He didn't wake up heck he didn't even react. He got even more comfortable. I knew what had to come next. Yes I did work out. I had a decent build. I can carry my own weight and little bit more if I'm completely honest. What I'm trying to say is that yes..yes I'm going to carry Jones to bed.

He wasn't heavy. He may have gotten taller and more built but he still feels the same weight as he always has felt to me. I carried him a lot when we were kids. Only because he was quite the clumsy kid. Always thinking things would work out perfectly well only for him to get hurt in the end. You know dumb clumsy kid things that result in scraped knees or elbows. In the end of everything I always had to be the one carrying him home. Don't get me wrong I got hurt too. I just didn't get hurt by doing stupid things. I got hurt by fighting other kids for picking on Jones.

I carried him to his bed and set him gently down. I may be angry with him but I would never just toss him on the bed. I won't lie and say I didn't stand there for a minute staring at his face. His scar is what left me standing there staring at him. It was a deep scar. I know how it happened. It was a horrible time if I'm being honest.

-

I remember it like this...

We were just playing tag when these guys showed up. They were older and much bigger than us. They wanted something from us and I can't quite remember what. It was horrifying. I was scared that Jam- Jones would get hurt, so i stood in front of him. What would I do if I had to go home to his parents telling them that Jones was taken?

I obviously stood in front of Jones shielding him from these men. They were holding pocket knifes. They looked intimidating of course but I couldn't let them hurt him. I remember repeatedly telling them that we wouldn't go with them. Jones kept telling me to be careful. I guess I made them angry because next thing I know...I was on the ground.

Blood was on the grass and on my shoes. I was horrified I thought I had gotten cut or stabbed...but I didn't feel any pain. I remember seeing Jones in front of me holding his hands up in the air. That's when I realized it wasn't me that had gotten cut. It was Jones. "How could I let this happen?": was the only thought in my head. I don't remember what happened next. All I remember is that Jones was in the hospital and the stupid bastards were locked away.

He didn't want to look at himself in the mirrors for days, so I did what any reasonable kid would do. I made a scratch on my face too. Well I guess it isn't exactly reasonable. It was quick but painful. It's the tiniest scar and is barely noticeable but Jamey felt better about the way he looked. I told him that he looked badass with the scar. Maybe word of encouragement would've worked better than making a scar on my face.

I remember my mother being angry but not super angry. She knew the reason but she told me never to do stupid shit like that ever again.

I feel bad about it now. It was my own fault for being stupid and causing Jamey that scar on his face. I wish I could somehow reverse it maybe somehow stop Jamey from protecting me.

-

I couldn't help myself. I touched his scar. This made him jolt right awake. He grabbed my arm quickly. He had his eyes widen like he had seen a ghost. God his grip on me hurt. His breathing was quick and uneasy. Once he realized it was me his eyes softened and his breathing relaxed.

"Sorry...You just scared me..."

"No its my fault but uh...can you let go of my arm?"

With that he quickly let go of my arm.

"Sorry for touching your scar...I just-"

Stupid little shit cut me off.

"No no...it's fine do you want to hear how it happened? It's not all that bad so im fine with sharing it."

"....Sure"

I should've stopped myself from saying yes. I should've know what he was going to say.

"I got it when I got bullied by these kids. They wouldn't leave me alone. Then one day they pushed me and I scratched my face on a rock. Funny story right?"

Did he really want to erase me out of his life. If he did then why the hell did he agree to live with me? I felt myself grow angry and upset at his fake ass story. My face must've looked upset because he immediately looked apologetic.

"Vanill-"

"Goodnight, Jones."

I rushed out of the room and straight onto my bed.

It took me a lot longer to fall asleep than expected. My mind kept going back to him. Stupid Jamey...Stupid Jones.

-

I woke up to the smell of surprisingly not bacon. It was the smell of crepes. Crepes has always been my favorite type of breakfast even when i was little. When I entered the kitchen I saw that Jones was making them.

"Goodmorning, Vanilla. Want some crepes?"

Was this his way of apologizing? If so it's not working. I'll still eat the crepes, but him trying to erase me out of his life just isn't doing it for me.

We awkwardly ate our breakfast in silence. Silence used to make Jamey anxious. He would shake his leg whenever we took tests in school. Seeing that the whole table is shaking at least somethings about him are still the same.

"You want to head to a bar tonight?"

"Yes!"

His face brightened. He shared a huge smile. I missed his smile, his true smile. The last time he smiled at me was the party; that was more of a forced "Please don't yell at me" smile.

I couldn't help but smile a little. Don't get me wrong I'm still upset with him, but I don't want him to be sad.

The rest of breakfast I spent talking to him. It felt like old times. I learned that he's at a college only a few subway stations away. I also learned he's studying to be a professional photographer. It's not really a suprise; his father bought him his first camera when he was twelve. He took pictures of whatever we did always. I wonder if he deleted those.

I wanted to ask him more like why he wants to forget me or why did he really move away, but I couldn't bring my self to.