Chapter 16: Strangely drawn to you

Shanguan Zu Jin's POV

Li Susu's expression was amusing. I shouldn't doubt her anymore. We successfully end Wu Jinmai's life as the tyrant empress.

I know everyone won't believe her except me and Eunuch Liu, who cares for the late empress.

We know her very well, and Li Susu's behavior is the complete opposite of Wu Jinmai.

I can also compare their behavior even before the late empress changed as soon as she ascended the throne. The power and fear overcome her and turn her into a monster.

"It's your choice. You didn't know how I'd established myself after Wu Jinmai stripped me of my title as the Censorate. I will give you a warning. I'm not someone that you can withstand when I become your enemy."

I look at her in the eyes and show her how serious I am. I know I'm threatening her. That's what I'm doing.

I knew she was serious about taking me by her side. I will use that chance to observe her.

If she is like Wu Jinmai, who got overwhelmed by the power that the throne was holding, I'll stop her.

"Have you ever heard of this phrase? The emperor was the loneliest man in the world. Don't you agree with this phrase or not? Li Susu?"

She looked serious when she said those words. Wu Jinmai changed her emotions quickly and faked her smile.

It's really hard to switch names, especially when we're having a serious conversation.

"Forget what I said. If that's what you want, I will do as you say. I believe in what other people say. The fewer people who know your secret, the better," she murmurs.

She was trying to stand up and get off me, but I held her even tighter. Li Susu's expression was feeding my fantasy that Wu Jinmai never gave to me.

A stranger wearing the face of the woman I love might be a good combination to heal my wounds.

I nestled my face in her chest. She really smells like citrus, while Wu Jinmai's favorite perfume was plum.

"Are you not going to let me go? If you don't, I will take this seriously. I might think that you're flirting with me. You wouldn't like it when I assumed just like that," she stops talking.

"Don't give me reasons to believe that you chose me over Zhang Yi Hua. In my timeline, harem doesn't exist anymore. Having another woman or man while you are married is considered taboo, so if I were you, let go," Li Susu stated.

I raise my head and look at her intently. "Who collects three husbands?"

She scoffs and raises her index finger. "Wu Jinmai," she answered right away.

That made me laugh, and I loosened my embrace a little. I used the back of my index finger to caress her nose and pat her forehead lightly.

"From now on, you're Wu Jinmai. Didn't I tell you that? Don't even forget that. You must think and act like her. Your strategy and behavior will be different as you want reform while she's walking in the path of destruction."

I pulled her closer until she leaned on me. I preferred this citrusy fragrance from her perfume. It's more calming, unlike the strong scent that Wu Jinmai uses.

"Her etiquette as a woman should remain. You have to be careful because this empire was already in chaos."

She sighed and smiled sadly. I remember the day when I stabbed her. Li Susu was crying and telling me how hard it is to live in a world that she's unfamiliar with.

To live in a woman's body who is stained with innocent people's blood—that's too much for her. I brush her shoulder down to her arms.

"It must be really hard for you. Am I right?" I whispered. She blinks.

"Not really," she says, faking a smile as she hides the truth.

"You have to be strong, resilient, and brave. Wu Jinmai lives a life that is full of blood and sin. I will protect you, but you need to move forward and make sure that you won't be like her," I remarked.

Li Susu raises her hand and stops halfway. I held the back of her palm and let her feel the warmth of my face.

"Promise me, Li Susu."

I look at her and make sure she'll be convinced of what I've promised. I will protect this stranger who wants to atone for someone else's sin.

I'll be the greatest pawn she will ever have if she doesn't lose her way. I'll protect this woman who wants to protect this empire and its people.

She neared her face and pressed her soft lips against mine. My eyes dilated. I gulp and open my lips.

I held the back of her head and started moving. I know something is wrong with me, but I can't stop myself anymore…

'I don't care if I'll be used like a dog. I really want her!'

We both gasp and breathe heavily as we drift apart. "Then protect me and stand with me. I want to live, Shanguan Zu Jin. This time, I won't run away from my problem anymore. Stand with me, please?" she whispers.

Her eyes were serious when she begged me to stand with her. I smiled and claimed her lips again.

"Don't look at me as an ally, then. How about your true, one-and-only husband? How about that?" I proposed.

She softly laughs and wraps her hands around me. "I'm glad Wu Jinmai steals you away from Zhang Yihua. You asked that. You better forget about marrying her. I don't share my husband. Did you get me?" she whispers in my ears.

"Let's see if you're competitive enough," I remarked.

She faces me and pinches my cheeks. "You sneaky rascal, don't try me because I won't ever lose again."

After sorting things out and deciding what kind of relationship we'll have, we move back to her quarters.

Eunuch Liu welcomed us and didn't ask anything. It's dinner time, and they serve us this... I look at the two different dishes and the two different side dishes. Wu Jinmai coughs.

"Staying with me means you'll experience the abstinence that I'm doing, especially when it comes to food. I only eat a single dish and a side dish, so it's the same as yours, Shanguan Zu Jin," she explained.

I blink and try to smile, even if I'm quite pissed. I've come from a noble family, and these… are too little for a single meal.

"Eunuch Liu!" Wu Jinmai called.

The door opens, and the maidservants start to place another set of dishes and side dishes on the table. The maids and Eunuch Liu withdraw afterward.

"I apologize, my dear husband. I'm just messing around. You need the energy and good health for that sperm to swim, right?" Wu Jinmai utters.

"Sperm…?" I ask.

"Stop talking about words that no one will understand. Especially in court meetings, Li—I mean Wu Jinmai. Did you understand?" I asserted firmly.