FALSE SECURITY

The sights from the rooftop were strangely scenic. Since all the surrounding buildings were at most three or four-story high, the apartments towered above all of them, offering an all-around view of the area. Nora's previous shelter was a skyscraper downtown, but back then she didn't have any chances of admiring the views. She had other things in mind.

During the last six months, not even once did she feel safe. And yet, even after the crazy chain of events that had unfolded a couple of days ago, she now felt a glimpse of peace. Were things really going to be okay from that moment on? She knew it wasn't going to be that simple. Truth be told, not a lot had changed since they escaped the city center and arrived at the apartments. They might have found a new ally, they might have a new shelter; but the stakes were as high as they were at the starting point. Perhaps even higher.

They weren't safe. If anything, she felt like the world was giving them a false sense of security. It slumbered, waiting for a chance to crumble apart. It was only a matter of time. She couldn't allow herself to lower her guard.

She looked out to the horizon. The entire city stood still, like frozen in time. No movement dared break its lethargy, no sound shattered the silence.

'Ever since this entire mess began, I never noticed… Has the city always looked so… sad…?'

Nora didn't like the old world, but the new one was depressing in an entirely different way. She let out a deep sigh, and walked away from the handrail.

…

William had attempted to keep the shelter as functional as it was before the original community got disbanded, although they were obviously understaffed. Still, less people had less necessities. Survival should still be possible with proper task management.

He was the one in charge of keeping the building in good shape, performing maintenance just like he used to do before. Nora didn't truly understand why maintenance was such a big deal until the previous night. A rampant horde had passed through the area, although William said it wasn't a common occurrence in that district. It took a lot reassuring from him to be able to stay calm, and the same thing could be said regarding Claire, who by then had already been moved to the top floor. She had never encountered one of those hordes before, so it was only natural for her to freak out. Ironically, Lilian was the only one who remained calm through the entire event.

The building's overhangs had prevented the shamblers from climbing up to the higher floors, but the barricades all around the ground level had suffered noticeable damage. Wood was dislodged, metal was bent; the horde had crashed itself against the structure, and would have flooded the lower levels had they managed to break inside. And apparently, if they get too close to you, it's over. She knew that very well.

The defensive barricades were the only obstacle causing the nocturnal hordes to diverge away from the building's interior, and those were something only William had experience fixing.

On the other hand, he wanted Claire to help with the crops on the courtyard once she recovered from her injuries. Her condition had improved enormously, but her left leg still looked like it needed proper rest and care.

And finally, there she was. Stranded on the rooftop, walking around all day, keeping watch. And it was no wonder William wanted her to stay up there. They had every reason to be paranoid of incoming danger.

Nora recalled the conversation they had the day before, when everyone met on Claire's room to distribute food and water.

######

"This is all we can spare for now." said William, after placing three cans of food and two bottles of water on the small table by the bedroom's entrance. "Tomorrow we'll be a bit hungry, but we need to hold on to what we have for as long as possible. We should minimize looting trips as much as we can."

Nora sat quietly beside Claire's bed, with Lilian standing by her side and clinging to her as usual.

"Yeah, that makes sense. We'll bear with it." she replied.

"How is she doing?"

Nora turned her attention towards Claire, who reciprocated her gaze and then looked at William.

"I'm… better, I guess. My leg still hurts, but I think I'll be alright…" Claire frowned for a moment. "Thank you, by the way… For taking care of me…" she bit her lips and looked away. It was obvious she wanted to say something else, but for some reason she hesitated. To Nora, it didn't come as a surprise. Claire had never trusted people too easily, and the end of the world had only aggravated it further. Kindness was a rare sighting for her, creating nothing but emotions she chose to bottle up instead of letting go.

"That's fine. Focus on resting for now." William laid his eyes on the bedside table, which had a small pile of books on top of it. "But also try to use this time wisely if you can. You'll need to be able to help once you recover, we need all the hands we can get."

"R-Right…!"

He turned around and left the room, only to come back a couple of seconds later.

"Actually… I should tell you all about something. Specially you, Nora, since you're one keeping watch."

"Me…?" she felt she already had an idea about what he was about to tell them.

"I don't want you to look out for shamblers, I want you to look out for people. No matter if they look hostile or friendly, everyone is an enemy. Got it?"

"Is it related to the people who attacked us the other day…?" she felt dumb for asking such a question. Of course it was related to them. But she wanted to hear more details.

"Yes. Those guys… The ones we met on the other side of the river, and the ones who invaded the shelter, they are all a part of the same group of survivors. We've been on bad terms with them since way before you three arrived at the building."

"I see… But why? What do they want, exactly?"

"When they t-tortured me… they kept asking about a weapon stash, or something like that…" added Claire with shaky voice.

"There's a police department in the area, not too far from here. Well, there was; it's barely more than a dilapidated building now. Both their group and ours got there almost at the same time, we were marginally faster. A fight broke out, people died… Enemies were made." he explained. He didn't seem happy about recalling those events, his narrow eyes and frowning demeanor were clear signs of it. "They had been operating in the nearby districts for a while, probably since the beginning of the pandemic. I don't know where they came from or what kind of people they truly are, but so far, they've been acting like animals. Stealing what they can, killing whoever they please…"

"That's horrible… Why are they doing this…?" asked Nora. "Isn't there a way to survive without resorting to such things? This place should be proof of that…!"

"Indeed, and look how it ended."

An uncomfortable silence filled the room.

"Possible? Yes, by all means. It needs tolerance, teamwork, cooperation and mutual understanding. Everyone needs to work together and seek a common goal. It should be, and it probably is, the most efficient solution to this crisis. But it requires the creation a new law, in a lawless world. You get where this is going, right?"

"Hmm…"

"Not everyone is willing to go the extra mile. I think I've told you this before, but morals don't mean shit anymore. If you kill someone, you eat their share too. That's pretty much how they work." William run his hand through his hair, closed his eyes for a moment, and let out a deep breath. "It's easy to guess why they obsess over the weapons."

"Can't we just… turn them over…?" suggested Claire.

"That's basically like signing up for our own execution. If they get those weapons, we're all done for, I highly doubt we'll be spared. And if they don't get them, they'll keep coming back until they do. It's a dead end."

Nora lowered her sight. Deep down, she knew all along something wasn't quite right. The pieces were slowly falling in place, but it didn't make the picture any better. If anything, the picture was grim, that puzzle looked better when it was unsolved and scrambled.

"Our only chance of getting out of this is to outlive them, somehow. To pray that karma gets them where it hurts, before it gets us. And if we want to do that with as few people as we have, we can't afford to get any nasty surprises. Do you understand, Nora?"

"Y-Yeah…"

######

Nora shook her head. She needed to focus. She kept walking around the rooftop, taking laps around the perimeter, expecting to see movement at any moment. According to William, this other group of survivors was considerably more numerous than they were. Were they waiting for them to lower their guard? Were they licking their wounds, scared off after losing several of their members? The more she looked at it, the more ominous the quietness of the city became.

William had repeatedly told her that the shamblers weren't a real threat in that world. And Nora finally understood why. As much as they infested the streets and ran wild during the night, as refined as some of their senses were… They were nothing but a force of nature, one powerful enough to drive mankind to the brink of extinction. And like most forces of nature, they were predictable.

Humans are not.

******

Claire looked out the double doors, into the courtyard. After several days of rest, she was finally able to walk around, although she was aiding herself with a makeshift crutch. Her legs still felt weak, and she had a noticeable limp.

She thought she'd have a chance to get to the courtyard and inspect it in detail at William's request, but the sudden heavy rain prevented her from doing so.

"Can you walk around already?" asked William, coming out of nowhere. The drumming of the rain had drowned out the sound of his footsteps, so she didn't hear him approaching. Claire abruptly turned around, startled.

"Ah…! Jeez, d-don't scare me like that…!" she complained, unconsciously taking a shy step away from him. "Yeah, I can walk now. I should be able to function as usual soon…"

"I see. That's good to know."

He walked all the way up to the exit door, to the point that the rain was falling just a couple of inches away from his feet. He stared at the plants outside. An awkward moment of silence ensued, disrupted only by the downpour.

"S-So… What's exactly growing out there? I didn't really have a chance to check it out yet…" Claire said the first thing she could think of. Being alone and in silence with William made her feel anxious.

"Potatoes, carrots… Most of the crops are root vegetables, but there's also a couple patches of greens, and some beans. Apparently, most of this stuff can grow with limited amounts of sunlight. Also, some of these will need fertilizers, but most of them should be fine in poor soil."

"I see… That's smart, given the circumstances."

William brought out a cigarette and a lighter from his pocket, and started smoking before he continued talking.

"My wife chose them herself… She's actually the one who came up with the idea of planting crops in the first place. And we did manage to get a couple of harvests in the last six months, so I suppose it wasn't a bad idea after all. Not too plentiful, but worth it nonetheless."

William hadn't talked too much about himself. Based on what Nora told her, he was living in those apartments with more people until a certain incident left him as the sole remaining survivor. Which probably meant that his wife was no longer around. Claire realized she shouldn't bring the subject up at all, unless he did so himself.

But what was the deal with him? Claire didn't know what to make of it. So far, almost everyone around them was a selfish piece of shit, everyone did everything they could to take advantage of others, to secure a position of power and leave the weak ones to fend for themselves. In a sense, that was to be expected. In a world where all forms of order had crumbled down, the rule of the strong was often the only thing remaining.

She had gotten used to distrusting everyone. But this man puzzled her. He had stepped down from his own position of power, risking his life to save theirs. Yet his intentions were unclear. She highly doubted his actions were driven by goodwill. At least, not just goodwill.

"I really hope we can at least get another harvest from these plants. It'd have made her happy if they did… Can I count on you?" he asked.

'Could this be… his way of mourning…? Hmm… Well, I suppose the harvest will help everyone anyway…'

"Y-Yeah, sure. I'll do my best."

"Thank you."

Those last two words felt warmer, and more honest than anything preceding them. Claire's head was full of nothing but mixed feelings. She didn't want to trust him, yet she felt like he had somehow earned her trust so far. There seemed to be a cold emotional barrier separating them, but somehow, she understood the kind of pain he was probably going through.

She remained motionless, deep in thought. Eventually, William finished up his cigarette, and started fumbling with something on his waist, under his jacket. Claire couldn't see what it was.

Some seconds later, he turned to face her, and he was holding a pistol. She froze. Even though he wasn't aiming it at her, she felt a strange aura emanating from the weapon. Was that the same pistol she used some days ago? She wasn't sure. She gulped.

"I heard about what happened." said William.

"W-What do you mean…? I-I don't know what you're talking about…!"

"Don't play dumb. Nora told me."

'Damn it, Nora… Why…!?' Claire bit her lips and avoided eye contact. Of course, she knew what he was talking about.

"S-So? What about it…?"

Even when looking away from him, she could tell he was drilling her with his own gaze.

"You want to be able to protect them, don't you?"

"Huh…?" Claire resumed eye contact again.

William's arm was reaching out to her, offering her the grip of the gun.

"Do you want me to teach you how to properly use it?"

She was scared.

"R-Really…? I-Is it o-okay…?"

William nodded. A gun's purpose is either to intimidate, or to kill. And neither of those things should be okay. Part of her was willing to go that far and beyond in order to protect the people she cared about, but another part of her was terrified of the concept.

It was a difficult choice to make. So why? Why was she so eagerly holding the gun she had been offered?

…

"That's right, now line up the sights like I've told you, and pull the trigger." said William.

The target was easy to hit, a piece of cardboard with a cross scribbled on it, hanging from the opposite wall of the room. All the steps so far had been easy enough. Checking the safety, reloading, unloading… William had told her how to find the best posture to aim, explained how to hold the weapon correctly to improve accuracy and reduce recoil… So far so good.

Why was the last step so complicated? She only had to pull the trigger. It was just a piece of cardboard. She didn't hesitate when faced with a bunch of potential murderers, but she had doubts against a practice target?

Her hands started shaking violently. She took her finger away from the trigger, fearing she might fire accidentally. William's hand rested on her own trembling hands.

"It's okay. Calm down, breathe."

"I-Is it…? Is it really okay…? How do you know…? How do you know it's okay…?"

******

Claire didn't look like she realized at all, but when William rested his hand on the weapon, he had engaged the manual safety. She started sobbing, and her breathing got rapid and panicked. He definitely didn't want her to fire a gun in that state.

She had become a bundle of nerves in a matter of seconds, William felt sort of bewildered. He knew she killed one of the invaders, shooting him down and then strangling him to death. Was that experience the source of this panic attack? He had the feeling there was something else to it.

It didn't escape William's perception: what Nora had originally described as a timely bout of anger was likely a façade, an emerging consequence of some more complex circumstances he wasn't aware of.

"Are you thinking about what you did the other day…?" he asked. He waited for an answer, but Claire didn't say anything. She just kept shedding tears and focusing her eyes on the gun, as if mesmerized by it. "Listen… I've told Nora the same thing before, but the first time is always the most difficult one. It gets easier afterwards, and—"

"It doesn't." she interrupted him.

"What…?"

"It doesn't get any easier… It fucking…. doesn't….! Damn it…!" her knees failed her, causing her to drop down to the floor. Struggling to talk while crying, she let go of the gun.

William observed for a while. He picked up the gun and stored it again on its holster.

"Look, I don't know what have you done in the past. But whatever it was, you had a reason to do it, right?"

Her crying intensified. Yes, I did. Those are the words she looked like she wanted to scream at the top of her lungs. He sighed.

"Stay faithful to that reason, and don't get carried away by your emotions. Focus on the path ahead. We're going to need your help, alright? That's all the advice I can give you right now."

He started walking away, leaving Claire to compose herself in peace.

"If you're feeling better tomorrow, we'll continue this lesson where we left it."

'Seriously, just what the hell happened to you all…?'

If he said he wasn't curious, he'd be a dirty liar. Even though he had personally shared some details here and there about his own past issues, he knew virtually nothing about those three, besides the fact that they came from another shelter and they ran away after it got overrun. Yet it was way too obvious that something serious was going on in their minds. But both Nora and Claire seemed reluctant to disclose anything.

Of course, he wasn't going to ask them directly. At least, not yet. He had no right to stick his nose in their personal lives. Although, if their emotional outbursts started to become a serious obstacle for their survival, he'd have to have a serious talk with them. So far, they pushed through the adversities, but he wasn't happy with the risks taken.

One way or another, they were hiding something. Even they should be perfectly aware of how obvious that was. William had no idea if whatever that secret was would end up being bad news for him. He'd need to remain cautious of them, just in case.

...

Days went by without issues. Well, without unusual issues would a more precise way of describing it. And William wasn't buying it. Nora reported no signs of activity, besides shamblers standing around or hugging the walls of the building. He didn't notice anything strange either.

By all means, he would expect Jacobs' group to retaliate again in a short period of time. Had something happened? Perhaps some internal quarrel they hadn't resolved yet? He had no idea, but the waiting was getting on his nerves.

He had paid a swift visit to the weapons cache, and was carrying not only a gun, but also a combat rifle strapped on his back; at all times. Claire had finally gotten more comfortable with a pistol after some additional lesson, and carried it for self-defense as well. Nora refused to wield any guns for the time being, and just chose to stick with the hammer she had somehow managed to bring back from their initial trip. He figured he would keep insisting over time, and sooner or later she'd yield.

The only one he wasn't able to gear up at all was Lilian. As a matter of fact, he couldn't even talk to her, any interaction was like trying to talk with a rock. The girl avoided him like the plague, frowning and pouting whenever she saw him coming, and shutting down outright if he got too close for comfort.

At least she was able to be of use when she followed Nora or Claire around. Nora assured William that Lilian was able to provide assistance when keeping watch. Apparently, even though her communication skills were somewhat impaired, her senses were perfectly normal, and she'd let her know in case she noticed anything out of the ordinary. Claire claimed she would help when carrying things around, setting up containers to pick rainwater, cleaning, etc.

Weirdly enough, he barely got to see any of that. Whenever he saw her, she was either extremely aware of him and focused only on avoiding him, or doing strange things, like staring into the distance, or up towards the sky.

He didn't worry too much about it though. As long as she could prove useful when she was around the others, that was already more than he initially betted on her.

Despite the fact that everyone was on edge, life in the shelter seemed to carry on. He found it almost nostalgic, seeing people wandering around the building again. He hoped things would stay as they were, although deep down, he was but certain that more hardships were waiting just around the corner.

******

It was early in the morning.

Nora walked faster down the hallway. Two apartments away from her own, that's where Claire was staying. She figured it was probably okay, but something about that situation felt strange. Not even once had such a thing happened over the last week.

She knocked on the door, causing a shaky, groggy voice to mumble from the inside. She heard some strange noises coming from the apartment, as if someone was stumbling with things on their way, and then the door swung open.

Claire fumbled with her glasses, trying to put them on. Her eyelids struggled to stay open. She had a disoriented look on her face, and her hair was a mess. She had just woken up.

"Y-Yes…? Ah, Nora…? What's up…?"

"Um, hey Claire. Sorry to wake you up this early, but… Have you seen Lilian?" asked Nora. She couldn't hide the worried, jittery tone in her voice.

"Eh…? Lilian? Wasn't she sleeping with you?"

"She's… not in my room."

"That's weird… I wonder what—"

Claire stopped talking as she heard hurried footsteps coming from the nearby stairwell. Suddenly, William emerged from the darkness. He didn't look happy. Eyes wide open, sweaty, frowning… He looked very agitated.

"W-William…? Is something wrong…!?" asked Nora as he came to a stop right beside them.

"We've got a fucking problem…!! The ground entrance was wide open! And I'm damn sure I left it closed last night!"

"Eh…!?"