Chapter 19

We arrived back at the house around 2 pm. Mom came out of the house and was standing on the porch as we got out. Mallory said a quick goodbye as she headed for her house. As I turned to my mom, I had to force a smile on my face so as not to seem suspicious as she leaned in and hugged me.

"Oh, my darling Perri! Did you have fun? How did you like the college? Were the dorm rooms comfortable? Oh, my baby girl, I'm so sorry I was not here for your birthday. Do you forgive me?"

"Of course, Mom. Hey, we are still doing dinner tonight at The Waterfront, right?"

"Yes, we are. I really do wish I could have been here, but I also understood you are all grown up now and wanted to spend the weekend with friends. You will have to tell me all about it tonight over dinner. I need to make a quick run into the office to grab some papers I forgot and clear up a few things. I will be back at five so we can head out about 5:30. OK?"

"Yea, that sounds good. I am going to put my stuff away, take a quick shower, then maybe take a nap. It was a really long weekend."

"Alright dear. You go rest and I'll see you in a bit. Love you darling."

"I love you too Mom." 

She gave me a quick hug and headed to her car. I got the rest of my stuff from my car and headed into the house. I quickly took care of my stuff, started a load of laundry, then hopped in the shower. When I had finished getting ready. I planned to nap but I just couldn't fall asleep. I checked the time and saw it was only 2:55 so I grabbed my sketchbook and headed for my car.

Before I got out, I set an alarm on my phone for 4:45 so I would have plenty of time to get back before we planned to leave. I grabbed my backpack, slung it over my shoulder, and headed for my cave. 

I sat down on my favorite rock and glanced out at the ocean. Whenever I was struggling, this place always calmed me. Maybe it's not about the ocean at all but more the lighthouse out on the island. Lighthouses are a symbol of safety and protection. Maybe that's why I am comforted when I come here.

I pulled out my sketchbook and started to draw. I wasn't paying attention to what I was drawing, I just let my imagination flow. Soon I was digging for some colored pencils and added some color to my picture. 

I looked down at my completed drawing. This one was on the light side. Not much was happening in this drawing. A woman kneeled in front of a small garden next to the lighthouse which made an appearance in all my drawings. You couldn't see her face, just the back of her head. She had a long light blonde French braid that ran down the middle of her back. A little girl maybe around the age of five kneeled down next to her smiling up at the woman's face. 

I sat staring at the picture trying to figure out why it felt like I was missing something important. Something else should be here but I just didn't know what it was. I was startled by the ringing of my alarm going off. Wow! Time went by fast, too fast sometimes. I gathered all my things and put them back in my bag. As I stood, I just stared out at the lighthouse. Suddenly the feeling of something missing was overwhelming. I needed to get out and occupy my mind with something else. 

On the way back to my car I tried to think of safe topics to discuss with my mom tonight. Suddenly my phone started ringing. I pulled it out from my pocket and looked at the caller ID I saw it was Eric. I smiled lightly and answered.

"What happened missed me already? Or just checking in to make sure I didn't skip town and run for the hills?" I made it back to my car and as I opened the door he responded with a light laugh.

"Haha very funny Periwinkle. Actually, I called because Colton and I just had a long talk with our mom."

"Eric why? You knew I wasn't ready yet! I don't want people to know. What if they say something and the police come looking for my mom! Did you think about how this would affect me? I'm not that little girl you knew all those years ago. You can't just go tell your mommy everything that is going on in my life. It wasn't your place to say anything without asking me first."

"Don't hang up on me just hear me out, ok?"

"You have two seconds, so you better make it quick."

"She wants to see you."

"Of course she does so if she comes to the same conclusion we have she can all the authorities."

"No, Perri that's not it at all. She just wants to help. I promise! My mom will not say anything until you are ready. She wants to invite you to come over to our house on Saturday."

"I can't do weekends I have to work, and I already took this past weekend off. Sorry."

"OK, fine. What day works for you then?"

"Well, I'm not sure if Linda put me on the schedule for any extra days considering I took off for three. I can find out when I go in tomorrow."

"Colton said you normally don't work on Wednesday. He said Linda doesn't have kids work that day. We could do dinner then."

"Tell the little prince he has a big mouth." I paused for a moment. Just like Colton needed Eric, I needed Mal, who did Eric have? Maybe his mom was his support. I couldn't be mad at him for that. Not that long ago my mom and I shared everything. I took a deep breath before I responded to him "I will talk to Linda tomorrow. Right now, I'm already running late I have to go do my birthday dinner with my mom."

"Didn't you just get home like a few hours ago? Where did you go running off to already?"

I slid into my car and started driving back towards my house. "I was at my cave. My brain needed a break and it's the calmest place I have. Well usually."

"Did something happen? Is everything ok?"

"No, nothing like that. I just finished a picture and I felt very unsettled. Like I was missing something." I shook my head and laughed a little. "I know you probably think I'm crazy. It's just a picture."

"Not to you it's not. Maybe the next time I see you I can look at your drawings. I'd like to see what you draw."

"Well, they aren't that good. Just a habit of mine."

"Yes, but that habit is what is encouraging you to pursue a career to become an illustrator so you must be pretty good. And I will be good practice for you."

"What do you mean good practice?"

"You know eventually you are going to have a lot of people giving you constructive criticism on your work. So let me see it. Who all do you show it too now?"

"Well once in awhile my mom but she is busy a lot. I guess really only Mallory has seen it."

I pulled up to my house seeing mom's car already in the driveway. I quickly gathered my things and went inside. 

"Hold on a sec Eric." I looked in the kitchen but didn't see her, so I headed to the back of the house. There I heard the shower running. So, I knocked on the door just as the water had turned off. "Mom?"

"Yes Perri?"

"I'm just letting you know I am here and ready. I ended up going to my spot for a bit."

"OK Hun. That's fine. I'll get dressed quick and we can be on our way."

"Alright I'll be on the porch waiting for you." I started to head back outside. As I sat on our porch swing, I put my phone back up to my ear. 

"Sorry about that, I'm back."

"So, you have only shared your work with two other people? Hello! You want to be a famous illustrator you need to get your work out there a little more."

"Well, when I took art class my teacher saw them too so, technically three people have seen my work."

We both laughed at that. I guess I never realized how small my world was. I really did want people to see my work, I was just afraid it wouldn't be good enough. It was time for me to step out of my comfort zone and put myself out there more.

"OK Eric. You win this one. When I see you again if I have my stuff with me I will show you my work."

"If you, have it? Come on Periwinkle get real? When do you leave it behind? You will take any opportunity to go to your cave, so I bet you always keep it with you."

"Yea, your right." I giggled again. It was so easy talking to Eric. I was literally just mad at him and within minutes he had calmed me down and now we were laughing together. 

Just then my mom came out of the house. "Alright Hun, time to go get your birthday evening started!"

"OK Mom. Just give me a sec." I turned slightly, giving myself the illusion that I had some privacy. "Hey, I'll talk to you later. Moms ready so I gotta go but I'll give you a call tomorrow after I get done work."

"Alright, I'll talk to you later Perri West."

I shook my head "I'll talk to you tomorrow, Eric Hendrix!"

We both laughed as we hung up. I turned back around to my mom with a smile on my face ready to go but I stopped when I saw her face.

"Mom! Are you ok?" She had stopped with her hand in her purse and looked at me with a shocked expression on her face. "Mom, you're scaring me. You look as if you have just seen a ghost."

"Who was that you were just talking to Perri?"

Suddenly realization hit. She heard me say his name! What was I going to do now.