Chapter 18 - S

Sasuke wakes up three more times before he manages to move enough to serve himself a drink. He's glad he chose the tub to fall unconscious and that the water is still working. There is a glass filled with water around his fingers and broken cups on the floor—his flabby attempt those first two times he tried to drink something but his trembling hands were unable to grab anything.

Taking a deep breath, he tries to form a mental list of the things he needs to do now. He cannot exactly try to return to the Elemental Nations with as little power he currently has after all. That'll be his present objective. However, with his current handicaps, that's something of a long-term goal more than anything else so he needs small tasks that will distract him or a short-term goal he can work on while he heals or he won't know what to do with himself.

The truth is that Sasuke's been going from goal to goal without stopping for so long, that he doesn't know what to do without one.

Escape from this world is one, that's right, but… he doesn't know how to accomplish that. Not yet. He'll have to think about something but while his chakra is almost non-existent, and it'll take him a couple of weeks to replenish his large reserves, he needs something else to aim for.

When his mind is focused on a task, he can be calm and collected. However, the truth is that Sasuke's not a patient man. He's never been. He calls Naruto stupid for being impulsive when he is the same. Everything to achieve what he wants. No matter what he hurts, who he kills. If he can obtain it quicker, then anything else will matter. If he stops—if he takes his time to rest, he's scared he won't be able to stand up and continue.

And now he needs something to calm his rising anxiety but Sasuke doesn't not what. He feels it close to reach but not enough to actually grasp it. Everything just itches. An itch coming from somewhere inside him but he doesn't know where to scratch it or if he needs to scratch it for it to stop bothering him and that's unnerving.

The path is no longer clear and he desperately needs something he can work for and occupy his mind in. Surviving is not sufficient. Not for Uchiha Sasuke. He could do that effortlessly without it being a goal. He needs something to think about before sleeping and the first thing once he wakes up. Something he can work for and occupy his mind in. It just now occurs to him, but… he has always trained. He doesn't have any hobbies, or things to spend his time. All his goals were able to be accomplished by being stronger so he did everything to obtain power. Training day and night. Kill Itachi, avenge his clan, kill Danzo, destroy Konoha, and create an everlasting peace with him as the only villain are goals simply solved by gaining more power.

He does need to regain his strength, that's true, however… somehow now is not the same. He wanted everything to end and bring peace, but why is everything complicated every time he thinks he has hold of what he really wants? Why can't he rest? He's so tired.

Not that he can stop now. He needs to return to his own dimension, though what can he do? Training can't be, he's barely able to move. Not that being stronger will help him this time and something inside him tells him he's already reached the maximum level of his power. He only needs more skill and experience but what will those be of help at the moment?

What am I going to do?

The thought comes tinted with a light hysteria and anxiety. There's a tightening in his chest that makes it hard to swallow and think. He feels as if a dam inside him is about to crumble, desperation's building too quickly, and he can't fight it. He really can't and that… that scares him in a way he hasn't been since the Massacre. When he was just a child whose world turned upside down and his hero suddenly morphed into the villain. Weak and useless, lying on the floor, trembling, with tears and snot on his face as his mind repeated once and again all the murdering his brother shoved into his brain.

He hates it. Hates it so much he can't breathe.

Sasuke clenches his hands to stop the light shaking that is steadily forming, his breathing coming in short shaky pants. His chakra reacts to his emotions, making a small spark appear erratically on his skin. He shakily takes in a surprised gasp as a wave of pain different from his own runs through him.

That's Naruto, he thinks. A familiar stubborn resolve as strong as the pain accompanying it comes forth and that can't be from anyone else.

The sensation leaves as fast as it came and an amused huff escapes him. He can clearly picture Naruto screaming in irritation at the pain he must be feeling.

Somehow, that resilience coming from someone in a similar position as his own manages to calm him. It comforts him knowing he's not alo—No.

His lips form a thin line and his jaw tenses. He won't break. Not in an unknown world, not ever. Sasuke breathes heavily a couple of times. He needs a plan. Something to follow. Stomach rumbling almost painfully makes him glance again at the food and this time he nods firmly.

Eat first.

He takes a last gulp of water and licks his lips before placing the glass aside. Deciding he's well enough to try to stand, his hands go to the tub's sides. His arms tremble as he pushes himself upwards. The sensation of pins and needles stabs his legs as he moves them but he keeps moving forward, sweat forming on his temple, making his oily and sweaty hair stick to his forehead.

Perhaps he's lucky he has spent many times working until collapsing because now knows too well the sensation of chakra exhaustion. That means he's used to the feeling and knows what to do in these types of cases. That's why he's going to eat something and then he'll do some light exercise to take the stiffness away from his muscles.

Then he'll take a bath.

It's not much but it's still something to do.

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