Chapter 5 - Resentment

" why can all this happen? Why are they doing this to me? Why?.... (So many questions were raised in my mind.)

In his subconscious, on the line between life and death? The girl sat in the dark, and hugging her knees.

"You really are very pathetic." The sound was heard.

"pathetic..." I answered weakly.

'Maybe he's right? I'm so Pathetic.' I thought.

I don't know who is talking to me, and I don't really want to know either.

"Say? Do you want revenge on them." his invitation.

"Revenge? I don't have that kind of hatred." I answered, it was true, and a very stupid thing to say.

"Why...

"Why? I don't know. It's just, I don't understand? Why is he showing a facial expression like that."

"That's very strange? He killed you and your mother."

"I know.. but." I can't hate, maybe that's what I want to say, but I can't say it.

"Like that? Looks like you're just a naive girl... don't you think it's just an act? Maybe he's laughing now."

"Maybe you're right.." that's true, naive and stupid.

"Then... don't you hate them?

"I don't know..." maybe I'm frustrated right now, or maybe it's because I'm desperate.

"It's so pathetic, not even being able to take revenge on those who did something like this to you and your mother."

"I know..." of course I could admit that, but I ignored it. Why do I from hate now? Besides, it's too late, isn't it?

"No... you don't know. This is what you should know? They killed your mother by torturing her, just like you did."

"....."

"He slandered your mother as a traitor, then burned her alive naked and exposed her to the public."

"I don't want to hear that.." I said? Maybe I said that reflexively, or because I didn't want to hear the truth.

"His cries were not heard, all his kindness was ignored, he was even killed on the orders of the figure he loved."

"Stop.." That's very unfortunate isn't it.

"While you just stay in this place? And you harbor any hatred towards them."

"Please be quiet..." why am I trying to make him be quiet?

"Open your eyes, and look at this."

Then a magic projection appeared around the girl, and depicted a video showing the moments of her parents' death and torture. Seeing that, the girl's eyes shook violently.

"not stop..." maybe I said that, but I kept staring at the truth.

"It's really sad isn't it... you."

"Stop, please! Don't provoke my anger further..." provoking my anger, maybe that was his goal.

" Having no hatred, having no anger... do you know? right now, you look like a failure.." right, he was just provoking me. I know that, I don't want to hear it? But don't know why, I fell for that provocation.

"A failure as the only daughter she had? - How ironic, she shouldn't have given birth to a child like you." The voice said it again.

"Failure." I muttered that, my eyes shook, my body trembled. Maybe I'm angry, or am I aware of it? No, I definitely don't accept that, I don't think I'm a failure.

"I? failure.." but why am I scared.

"Yes, that's right, you are a failure..."

"I'm a failure, I can't hate, I can't be angry." Just because of seeing that sadness.— "I... I was a stupid person, just because of that, I.. I.." I said that, but actually? what do I want to say.

""Hate them...

"Let out your anger...

"Take revenge and destroy them as they destroyed you." The sound grew louder and scarier.

"Hate them, take revenge... I have to take revenge on them, with this anger, I..." I seem to have been provoked by him.

"Say? Do you hate them... do you want revenge on them." He said it again.

Somehow, I rise in certainty? I stared at the void, I showed my anger, my hatred, and my greed.

"I... I! I want revenge on them... I want to destroy them, with this hatred, I will..." I shouted, maybe that was the first time I said that hostility with a smile.

"VERY GOOD, THEN COME TO ME? O CHOICE HUMAND." The voice was very loud, it was able to destroy my ears, my mind, and my consciousness.

Maybe I saw it, or did I feel it? My subconscious was shaken, it was like emptiness, but it was cracked in destruction. I fell, and the figure called out to me.

.....

"WELCOME! in the palace of desires, O miserable human." The voice was heard.

I standing in front of him? Madness filled my mind and fear enveloped me.

"Good job! Your hatred was conveyed to me—.." I thought? Why does a figure like him exist in the world?

"Human! Come to me and kneel to the lord of this desire." He ordered arrogantly.

Then without saying a word I immediately knelt down following his orders, my body shivered with fear, I didn't even feel ashamed of my naked body.

And at the same time crazy thoughts are spinning in otaku? I thought what if I didn't obey him, would my death be more painful than before.

"O human? Recognize, I am the lord of desires 'Zyvaness'—. The figure who will guide you." he said again.

the girl feel it? Without knowing it, every letter that the figure uttered contained a word that actually contained the law of chaos within it.

The girl can't do anything? He realized that every letter the figure said contained a 'law' and a word containing 'chaos'. then that existence utters a complete sentence which contains an absolute command in it.

The girl was just silent and scared. Even his naked body was now soaked with sweat. Despair, fear, and resignation. It suppressed his very existence.

He thought of gaining strength by asking that existence for help, but that was naive without any sacrifice.

" say? What do you want to do, O chosen human. said the existence again.

Then the pressure directed at him disappeared because of the words 'say it,' and that was his order. Feeling the lightness given to her, the girl took the opportunity to speak.

But unfortunately, fear had sunk deep within him. He tried hard to speak, but his mouth trembled too hard to resist.

' please talk, please...please...please.' his lips trembled and his teeth clashed.

"SAY..." a loud voice sounded, and strong anger seeped into his body.

With those two overlapping fears? made the girl break very loudly, suddenly without her realizing it, the girl spoke loudly and fluently.

"Dear to Lord of Desires, Mr. Zyvaness. This lowly human desires power to avenge this hatred." he answered, and it was very smooth. However, just a few words he said made his jaw feel weak and he couldn't feel any muscles or bones holding it together.

But the orders continued, and made him continue talking even though he didn't want to. It was fear, desire and mouth speaking at the same time.

Drool coming out of his exhausted mouth? he couldn't resist the orders of that existence.

"Say! Are you worthy of that power?" the command sounded again.

His already weakened mouth answered him again.

"This human deserves it! In any way, and on any terms? This human will fulfill it." Her red lips trembled even more and were moistened by the saliva that came out.

" say! Do you want to serve a great figure like me. "

"I will serve the great lord 'Zyvaness'..."

"Say! What is your name now.."

"Neya! That was this human's previous identity..."

"Say! Do you want to accept a new identity."

"All orders from the great Lord 'Zyvaness' are absolute."

"Okay! From now on your identity will be known as 'The animus'— Vanma."

"neya, no? The animus 'Vanma—.. accepted that identity." he answered. Then the identity phenomenon was formed on his back which had a symbol of chaos painted on it? A random circle containing eight arrows like clockwork passing through its boundaries.

" Come closer to me." He ordered again.

And that girl? Vanma walked closer to the presence with his body shaking with fear.

"Say it again! Swear allegiance to me." said the existence, touching the chin of the girl who was kneeling under his feet.

"The animus, Vanma! swears to serve and remain eternally loyal to the great lord 'Zyvaness'." The answer staring at that existence. A black figure with silver light shining on both sides of its eyes and a wheel of darkness spinning within it.

"That's quite a good proposal! Then accept this power from me." The existence kissed the woman's lips and inserted a dark 'Core' into her.

That was the silver blood that that existence possessed! And the blood flowed into Vanma's body and made him a new figure.

"Very good! Your existence accepts my power... Vanma? From now on your existence is mine alone."

"Yes! My lord." The girl accepted it with happiness.

"Right now you are not human, nor a demon? But the line of death and life."

"Whatever it is, and everything this servant has belongs to the master. A gift from my master is very happy." He said it passionately.

Then, by waving his hand, the presence created a large chair right under the steps of his throne.

So majestic and terrifying, dark and domineering? And a statue of a headless fairy curled up on its back, with six pairs of wings spread majestically behind it.

"The throne is proof that you are my servant? Sit down and feel your power." He ordered, and Vanma moved from the top of the stairs to approach his throne.

Then she sat on the magnificent it throne.. at that moment, a black dress formed and covered her naked body. Even a black crown was placed on her head with a black veil covering her eyes.

" be happy and hate everything in that sad world. The voice echoed throughout the room.

"Pay attention everyone! The first servant of 'The Animus'—Vanma, has risen to this world." He stood with his arms outstretched, and terrifying cheers rang out everywhere.

But Vanma couldn't see where the sound came from.

"Vanma..." the voice sounded again with words that contained chaos.

"Yes! My lord."

"Show me, whether you are worthy of that power, or vice versa."

The existence waved its hand, then the girl's figure disappeared somewhere.

"Yes, my lord! This servant will show you." Vanma disappeared from the palace room, leaving a voice that echoed loudly inside.

....

Then right in the forest, where is the girl's body lying? The figure 'The Animus' appeared beside him.

'Dance beautifully? Vanma.' the figure closed his eyes.

And above the high sky, covered by dark clouds? The masked figure stood floating in the air.