Regret

The two of us are walking toward my mansion in silence. Despite the fact the day was filled with failure, I feel more flustered than upset after Jeshan's display in the food court. Recalling it makes me want to curl up into a ball and scream into a pillow. The heat in my cheeks never fades, even though we've been walking for almost 30 minutes now in awkward silence. At last, Jeshan speaks up. "I'm sorry for making you feel awkward in the food court. I should've apologized in private, so-"

I quickly cut him off. "Don't you dare bow your head again!"

He pauses and stares at me, confused I think, but nods. "Alright, I won't since you're demanding it." I sigh with relief as we continue walking. Another couple minutes of awkward silence passes before Jeshan speaks up again. "Training..." He mutters.

"Huh?" I tilt my head and look up at him.

"You wanted to know my hobbies... It's mostly just training. I want to be an adventurer." I don't say anything for a moment, as several thoughts run through my mind when he says that. I immediately wonder why he wants to become an adventurer, thinking it's because he wants to change his looks, prove he's not who people think he is by becoming strong and famous, or becoming so strong that anyone who messes with him will get a beating. I mostly think it's because of him wanting to change the way people see him.

However, something else is on my mind entirely, and I just say it without thinking. I smile at him for a moment before looking down and mumbling almost silently. "It must be nice...having the freedom to choose to do what you want in the future..."

I can feel Jeshan's gaze on me as he speaks. "Did you say something?"

I look up at him and say the next thing on my mind quickly, giving him a genuine smile as I always do. "I said I'm glad I got to learn more about you, even if it's just a little bit. I hope that someday I can make you feel comfortable enough to show some real emotion around me. For now, I just want you to know that I'll never look at you the way all those people around us were looking at you today. You'll always be just Jeshan to me."

Jeshan pauses, not saying anything for a moment, and we just look into each other's eyes as we walk, listening to the sounds of the nature around us. He never ends up responding to my statement before I can see my mansion from afar. I stand in front of him and stop him from walking any farther when I see the mansion. "I'll walk the rest of the way from here. Thanks again for today. Even though it wasn't as good as it could've been, I still loved every second of it. Well, mostly." I giggle. "See you at school tomorrow!" I then dash off toward my mansion; waving back at Jeshan as I do. He just stands there and waves back awkwardly until he's out of sight.

I hum happily as I walk toward my mansion, thinking to myself, "I'm not giving up yet. This is only the first day I've tried going out with him to do things. Maybe next, I'll take him to a manga café! And if he doesn't like that, I'll take him to a library! He definitely seems like the type who would enjoy reading." I giggle to myself, silently pumping myself up before regaining my elegant composure as I walk into the mansion.

"Welcome back, mistress." All the maids and butlers are there to welcome me home as always.

"Good to be back." I tell them all before walking down the hall and into my parents' office. It isn't until I walk through those double doors that I realize something is off. What really makes it apparent is that instead of working, my parents are both simply waiting for me when I enter. "Hello mother and father, is something wrong?" I tilt my head, giving them a worried gaze.

"Welcome home Sara. There's something we'd like to talk to you about... We..." My mother rests her cheek on her hand, glancing over at my father.

"We were wondering why you were simply out alone with a boy rather than having this so-called 'great protector' you told us you would have when you asked to go out for the day." My father finishes.

I pause and my eyes slowly widen as I hear that. "How do you..?" As I'm about to ask how they know that, I hear the double doors open behind me and I turn around to see none other than Edward standing there, bowing to my mother and father. My eyes widen with rage as the realization hits me. "You were spying on me..?! No wonder the maids and butlers knew I was about to walk through those doors!"

"We asked him to spy on you sweetheart." My mother admits sadly.

I look back at them, my wide gaze now with shock instead of anger. "You what..?"

"We were curious as to what this almighty protection of yours was. If we knew it had just been a simple boy, then we would've sent in a couple of the other servants as well." My father admits.

I immediately become furious once more. "He's not just a simple boy Dad! If Edward told you everything, you'd know people fear him because of the way he looks, so he really is the best protection poss-"

"Sara!" My mother shouts.

"What?!" I shout back.

"Do you really think telling the boy to use his looks to scare people off is going to make him feel any different about you? You may as well be treating him the same as everyone else around him. Isn't that why he's had to switch schools so often?" My father continues to speak calmly.

I pause as I realize he might actually be right. "Is that why he acts the way he does around me..?"

"From now on, please tell us exactly who you're going with whenever you go out so we know if we need to send anyone with you, alright?" My father more or less demands rather than asks. I simply nod my head, too upset at my realization to really understand the meaning of my father's demand.

"Alright, you're dismissed sweetheart. Are you hungry?" My mother asks.

I turn and start walking out of their office. "No, I already ate, so I won't be coming to dinner. Please leave me alone for the rest of the night..." I walk out before I hear if my parents even respond or what expressions they wear on their faces. I just walk to my room, kick off my shoes, drop my bag on the floor, and then lay face down on my bed. I bury my face into my pillow, just lying their as my father's words replay in my mind. As I think of the fact that Jeshan might actually hate me, I slowly start to cry.